Strangest/wierdest things you've seen at Glastonbury

[Neil]

1 minute ago, Neil said:

 i miss the balloon dANCE AND THE GUY WHO DID IT (I FORGET HIS NAME?).

MALCOLM HARDEE.

[Pinhead]

Didn't Keith Allen do that ballon thing as well for a while - sure I've seen a Glasto clip with him in the performance...

[CaledonianGonzo]

Yeah - there's footage of it in the Julien Temple movie.

[Pinhead]

RE: Cat and Mouse - I wonder if this was the same act I saw late on the Sunday iirc in T&C maybe back as late as 2007 (as I remember it being v. wet), and it was a woman who began with the old familiar (by then) metal chastidy belt and grinder that she used on it to create showers of sparks, then ended the act with a burlesque dance which included 'simulated' masturbation followed by going down on a dildo on a chair, which drew sudden gasps from a number of the female crowd who didn't believe she was actually going to do it, whilst all the lads maintained a silent thousand yard stare....

[Sawdusty surfer]

1 hour ago, Pinhead said:

RE: Cat and Mouse - I wonder if this was the same act I saw late on the Sunday iirc in T&C maybe back as late as 2007 (as I remember it being v. wet), and it was a woman who began with the old familiar (by then) metal chastidy belt and grinder that she used on it to create showers of sparks, then ended the act with a burlesque dance which included 'simulated' masturbation followed by going down on a dildo on a chair, which drew sudden gasps from a number of the female crowd who didn't believe she was actually going to do it, whilst all the lads maintained a silent thousand yard stare....

Could easily have been Empress Stah. 

[stuartbert two hats]

I saw someone stood still, not dancing for the whole of Confidence Man.

[Justcalledtosay]

18 hours ago, Skip997 said:

Only vaguely related, but there used to a lot more nudity on site among the punters/crew. Now you only see it in the Lost Horizon Sauna.

I remember doing a shift on the Glade crossroads a good few years back, and hearing reports of a naked man walking around the teepee field, this was considered a problem, which the organizers clearly wanted to stop. Now 100% there was nothing sexual involved, for a lot of full time teepee dwellers walking around naked is normal. Anyway later that day I bumped into a old friend (a full time teepee dweller) and was not surprised to learn that he was the "culprit".

Was sat outside the Bimble Inn on the Thursday afternoon for a good few hours this year and saw PLENTY of nudity meandering through Avalon.

[Zoo Music Girl]

18 hours ago, CaledonianGonzo said:

Puppetry of the Penis?  Fairly mainstream innit. Been a regular fringe theatre fixture for ladies on a night out for a couple of decades now.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Puppetry_of_the_Penis

I went to see this with my mum and aunt at Southend Cliffs Pavilion when I was 16.

[blutarsky]

I walked around site on Wednesday evening 2019 for a good hour or two wearing a hollowed out Henry hoover as a helmet. 

[justanotheronethen]

94 about 3AM in the market stalls sat for a while watching a bloke who looked like Emo Phillips slowly dry-humping a pile of blankets on a double mattress. After a while a bloke emerged from the blankets looking confused so I gave him a cigarette. I asked Emo how we was and his eyes rolled back into his head.

Me and the bloke went our separate ways

[Bike_Like_A_Mum]

I was doing a laughter yoga workshop on Sunday lunchtime in the healing fields. There was a kind of hessian runner which went through the middle of the tent but was rolled up a quarter of the way towards the middle. Half way through the class, it just suddenly rolled and unravelled to reveal a man inside. Haha. Was so funny, no-one realised he'd been in there the whole time. Obviously curled up in there after a heavy Saturday night. 

Funniest thing was, at the beginning of the class, the teacher was sitting on top of the rolled up bit of rug, effectively sitting on top of him. Brilliant

[Curlygirl]

14 hours ago, stuartbert two hats said:

I saw someone stood still, not dancing for the whole of Confidence Man.

I cannot fathom how this would be possible?! 

[MEGATRONICMEATWAGON]

To be honest, all the weird and strange stuff I've seen is out in the open. The art, sculptures, the stuff in the SE Corner, or the circus stuff, the half-naked people twizzling on poles, the nurses giving out shots from syringes, the nudists walking through the sun in broad daylight etc.

Probably on a personal level, one of the strangest experiences was when I was on my way to the SEC once with a mate and we stopped outside of a stand to roll a ciggie, high as we were off MDMA, we couldn't roll very well - it was also dark and we had our sunglasses on. A mum came along a minute or two later with her son in a pushchair. We started chatting about the festival as you do.

Then came along a man of about 45 with a lad of about 18 who turned out to be his son and they told us they had eaten some 'shrooms - not that anyone needed any telling, their eyes were as large as saucers. So, anyway, the mother didn't bat an eyelid at the father/son duo with saucer eyes, and we didn't want to be rude so we removed our sunnies and revealed our saucer eyes and we just gurned and smiled, and the 5 of us had a lovely conversation about the festival and who we'd seen.

Give or take about 4 generations of people, meeting randomly and chatting shit, then we all went off again in our separate directions. This was at about 11:30pm, somewhere before Avalon, before we hit the one way system after we'd seen Skrillex.

That conversation always stays with me and reminds me of the strange comings-together you can experience.

[paulshane]

I'm hoping someone else can confirm this actually happened, as I can't find any info on the internet about it, but it was in 1997 I think, whichever year Underworld headlined Other, and during the break, Keith Allen came on stage with 20 or so other performers and did a few short songs, culminating in a repeated verse of 'chris evans is a ginger c**t' over and over until they were all dragged off stage by security.

 

I was right at the front, and remember turning to the guy next to me and asking 'did that just happen?' and he looked equally confused.

I'm sure it did happen, but it was so unexpected that every day that passes , more doubt creeps into my mind 😄

 

[blutarsky]

2 hours ago, Bike_Like_A_Mum said:

I was doing a laughter yoga workshop on Sunday lunchtime in the healing fields. There was a kind of hessian runner which went through the middle of the tent but was rolled up a quarter of the way towards the middle. Half way through the class, it just suddenly rolled and unravelled to reveal a man inside. Haha. Was so funny, no-one realised he'd been in there the whole time. Obviously curled up in there after a heavy Saturday night. 

Funniest thing was, at the beginning of the class, the teacher was sitting on top of the rolled up bit of rug, effectively sitting on top of him. Brilliant

This could almost have been me. I worked in 2019 and had a big Saturday night with my final shift from 4 pm until midnight on Sunday. We wanted to make sure we made the most of Sunday so we will Timblin around and I just needed to get some sleep so lay down in the middle of a tent in the healing fields for 40 minutes nap while my wife waited to see a healer. I woke up in the middle of a laughter yoga class going on all around me. I wasn’t rolled up in a carpet though. 

[henry bear]

Friday 2017. Some random fella right at the front of the Pyramid, severely dehydrated, very territorial. Would not accept any offers of fluids, indeed got unnecessarily argumentative with all around him.

[CauliflowerEar]

5 hours ago, Bike_Like_A_Mum said:

I was doing a laughter yoga workshop on Sunday lunchtime in the healing fields. There was a kind of hessian runner which went through the middle of the tent but was rolled up a quarter of the way towards the middle. Half way through the class, it just suddenly rolled and unravelled to reveal a man inside. Haha. Was so funny, no-one realised he'd been in there the whole time. Obviously curled up in there after a heavy Saturday night. 

Funniest thing was, at the beginning of the class, the teacher was sitting on top of the rolled up bit of rug, effectively sitting on top of him. Brilliant

WOW

What a wild story! I always knew the real demented debauchery took place at a fabulously quirky and downright side splitting session of 'laughing yoga'. Next year, remind me to hang around the healing fields on a Sunday afternoon to really have my eyes opened. 

[philipsteak]

49 minutes ago, CauliflowerEar said:

WOW

What a wild story! I always knew the real demented debauchery took place at a fabulously quirky and downright side splitting session of 'laughing yoga'. Next year, remind me to hang around the healing fields on a Sunday afternoon to really have my eyes opened. 

Just put a reminder in your phone. 

Easy. 

[Upside down frowner]

At my friend's first Glastonbury about 6 years ago he came back to the caravan wide eyed around mid morning whilst we were still up chatting shit

'funny night,  I ended up at a place where ping ping balls were being fired out of ass holes and we were catching em in our mouths' pretty certain it was the unfair ground 🤣

[bamber]

I saw an Oak tree, split in two, by a lightning bolt, at the festival.

I did, It was 198x.

I walked up to it the following morning. South side.

Oak tree, split in two.

Near miss.

 

[kingbadger]

On 8/23/2022 at 4:44 PM, henry bear said:

Friday 2017. Some random fella right at the front of the Pyramid, severely dehydrated, very territorial. Would not accept any offers of fluids, indeed got unnecessarily argumentative with all around him.

Did he have an apple and some chewing gum with him by any chance? 

[Cleoclaptrap]

I saw a proper treadle Singer sewing machine abandoned on a Monday morning in Row Mead/Hawkwell many years ago.

This thing was huge and heavy and had obviously taken dedication to get it on site. It wasn't near any roadways and I can't see how it would have fit in a trolley so would have to be carried in.

So whoever had the crackers idea to take an antique sewing machine to Glastonbury was also a master manipulator getting other people to help. 

 

 

[CauliflowerEar]

24 minutes ago, Cleoclaptrap said:

I saw a proper treadle Singer sewing machine abandoned on a Monday morning in Row Mead/Hawkwell many years ago.

This thing was huge and heavy and had obviously taken dedication to get it on site. It wasn't near any roadways and I can't see how it would have fit in a trolley so would have to be carried in.

So whoever had the crackers idea to take an antique sewing machine to Glastonbury was also a master manipulator getting other people to help. 

 

 

Thats the sort of object that would be a laugh to try and roll down a hill and see the carnage it hopefully causes. 

[paulo999]

Quote

 

To start with nothing super unique - got into the Piano bar via the 2 berth caravan. It got very weird. This was Monday morning. So most people still there were crew - theatre I think. As the outside world was packing up, finally facing reality, the pano bar was a humming mess. I got so thirsty I thought it would be ok to just swig from the 5 litre water bottle landed next to me. It was pure vodka. Ouch. Crawled out of the back of the piano bar, blaring sunlight. Around were verrrry fucked crew and randoms.

Mondays are always the weirdest. Wild West.

 

[Pinhead]

Out of all the nights I've gone to Piano Bar, Sun into Mon has always turned out the maddest as they all abandon what little structure they have left there at the venue...