eFestivals FC

[Avalon_Fields]

There's an ace eFestival team out there already:

@Foot1ball @Football Guru @SoccerSteve @GoaldenBoots @Shooter123  @messi @ronaldo @pele @Beck_ham @mourinho @Bobby Firmino

[the wonderwhy]

1 minute ago, Avalon_Fields said:

There's an ace eFestival team out there already:

@Foot1ball @Football Guru @SoccerSteve @GoaldenBoots @Shooter123  @messi @ronaldo @pele @Beck_ham @mourinho @Bobby Firmino

Don't forget @Muzzy Izzet

[Hugh Jass]

7 minutes ago, jump said:

Stupid question, what's TAA? My head is going to tits and ass.

Trent Alexander Arnold - an English footballer about to be cut from the squad for the upcoming European Championships.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

The very last time that I played football it was for a Sunday league team. I had been out until the wee hours the night before and wasn't due to play football that day at all. I know this because I don't actually play football. However, some people that I knew had formed this football team and were short of a player, so they drove to my house to 'get me'. I told them that there was no way on earth that I wished to play football for them as I had been drinking heavily and just wasn't able to do that. I can't recall how but the bastards did in fact eventually manage to talk me in to it. All I experienced throughout the match was pain - both physical and mental. However, one lad had been out until 5am that morning and they had also got him out f bed to play. He made me feel a little better about my situation because every now and again he would actually vomit on to the pitch. Now there was one more element to this nonsense. We were playing a team from a very rough pub in a very rough part of Birmingham. Before the match even started they had informed us that we weren't to score a goal because if we did they would beat us up.And then one of or side did one of the maddest things that I have ever witnessed - his love f football / glory /call it what you like, got the better of him ad he went and scored a goal. He was chased by a rabble of their team who wanted to hit him. However, they weren't the healthiest and he managed to get away and hide somewhere. I can't recall how things went on from there but we probably promised them that we wouldn't do it again sort of thing.

Anyway, while I am very flattered to be made a sub of the efests football team, please may I ask to be dropped from the squad. I never want to play football ever again. Not that there was actually going to be a match. I still need that certainty.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

Just now, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

The very last time that I played football it was for a Sunday league team. I had been out until the wee hours the night before and wasn't due to play football that day at all. I know this because I don't actually play football. However, some people that I knew had formed this football team and were short of a player, so they drove to my house to 'get me'. I told them that there was no way on earth that I wished to play football for them as I had been drinking heavily and just wasn't able to do that. I can't recall how but the bastards did in fact eventually manage to talk me in to it. All I experienced throughout the match was pain - both physical and mental. However, one lad had been out until 5am that morning and they had also got him out f bed to play. He made me feel a little better about my situation because every now and again he would actually vomit on to the pitch. Now there was one more element to this nonsense. We were playing a team from a very rough pub in a very rough part of Birmingham. Before the match even started they had informed us that we weren't to score a goal because if we did they would beat us up.And then one of or side did one of the maddest things that I have ever witnessed - his love f football / glory /call it what you like, got the better of him ad he went and scored a goal. He was chased by a rabble of their team who wanted to hit him. However, they weren't the healthiest and he managed to get away and hide somewhere. I can't recall how things went on from there but we probably promised them that we wouldn't do it again sort of thing.

Anyway, while I am very flattered to be made a sub of the efests football team, please may I ask to be dropped from the squad. I never want to play football ever again. Not that there was actually going to be a match. I still need that certainty.

Spellings a bit shit in places because my keyboard is fucked a little.

[jump]

15 minutes ago, Hugh Jass said:

Trent Alexander Arnold - an English footballer about to be cut from the squad for the upcoming European Championships.

Gotch, I didn't catch on because of the abbreviation.

[Somto Unigwe Raphael]

53 minutes ago, thewayiam said:

Don't put me in defence Haha. Though days are long gone

If you want I could put you up front and move @Mouseboy11 to the LW, think he can do a good Heung-Min Son type performance out there. @Matt42 moved to RB, think him and @The Martini Police could form a good connection, on the same wavelength.

You can be our Edinson Cavani. A veteran of the forum but still got a lot to give.

[squirrelarmy]

@Matt42 on the right wing? He will love that. 

[blutarsky]

1 hour ago, jump said:

Stupid question, what's TAA? My head is going to tits and ass.

Correct. 

[blutarsky]

I’ll put my hand up got a spot in midfield. Love a bit of Friday afternoon post work kickabout 

[thewayiam]

1 hour ago, Somto Unigwe Raphael said:

If you want I could put you up front and move @Mouseboy11 to the LW, think he can do a good Heung-Min Son type performance out there. @Matt42 moved to RB, think him and @The Martini Police could form a good connection, on the same wavelength.

You can be our Edinson Cavani. A veteran of the forum but still got a lot to give.

As long as I don't have to use my head haha

[Ayrshire Chris]

I assume this is an amateur team so sadly I have to rule myself out, despite the fact that most successful teams have traditionally had at least one Scot. For several years I took payment from a national broadcaster as a radio pundit so technically I am professional 😉. 

[Avalon_Fields]

28 minutes ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

I assume this is an amateur team so sadly I have to rule myself out, despite the fact that most successful teams have traditionally had at least one Scot. For several years I took payment from a national broadcaster as a radio pundit so technically I am professional 😉. 

Are you Archie MacPherson then? 😆

[Ayrshire Chris]

14 minutes ago, Avalon_Fields said:

Are you Archie MacPherson then? 😆

No, I was used mainly for my incisive in depth analysis, knowledge  and expertise of one particular club. 

[Somto Unigwe Raphael]

21 minutes ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

No, I was used mainly for my incisive in depth analysis, knowledge  and expertise of one particular club. 

Is this you?

 

 

 

Edited June 1, 2021 by Somto Unigwe Raphael

[Ayrshire Chris]

45 minutes ago, Somto Unigwe Raphael said:

Is this you?

 

 

 

Eh no. I took calls from idiots, didn’t make them! 

[Quark]

2 hours ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

Eh no. I took calls from idiots, didn’t make them! 

Scottish football broadcasting hit its apex, its absolute peak, with this.

 

[Andy0808 v5]

Give it to Russy til’ end of the season.

[squirrelarmy]

Going to hijack this thread to let you know about the eFests Euro 2020 Fantasy Football League. All details here:

 

[stuie]

On 5/31/2021 at 10:26 PM, crazyfool1 said:

and the fudge before it ..... 

This one the same author?

[Crazyfool01]

17 minutes ago, stuie said:

This one the same author?

Who knows … maybe connected .. 

[BlueDaze]

On 6/1/2021 at 8:56 AM, squirrelarmy said:

Two holding defensive midfielders, Is this Southgates efests account?

well its not Peps....

[BlueDaze]

may i suggest:

@vintagelaureatein the sweeper role - his organisation is exemplary...

@Ayrshire Chris(despite his professional status) for his reliability - He is often in the vicinity of the ground, even when there is no match on (and i think he wears his kit every day just in case he gets the call)... 

@deebeedoobeemust be on the coaching/ground staff - pre match prep, choice of studs, pitch inspection etc..

 

[deebeedoobee]

4 hours ago, BlueDaze said:

may i suggest:

@vintagelaureatein the sweeper role - his organisation is exemplary...

@Ayrshire Chris(despite his professional status) for his reliability - He is often in the vicinity of the ground, even when there is no match on (and i think he wears his kit every day just in case he gets the call)... 

@deebeedoobeemust be on the coaching/ground staff - pre match prep, choice of studs, pitch inspection etc..

 

As long as that doesn't include washing dirty kit and kecks.

Can I be in charge of the orange segments for half time?

[balti-pie]

halftime pies seem a shoo-in for me but im slightly disappointed not to get a call-up in the classy distributor from the back libero role