Best Bogs

[Doug85]

If it hasn't already been mentioned stay away from the loo's in Silver Hayes. I made the mistake of going there after i'd been to the BBC introducing stage on the saturday last year and it was as though someone had set off a sh*t bomb.   

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

14 hours ago, clarkete said:

I hope you're OK and that you do at some point decide you'd like to go again, as it's obviously meant a great deal to you. 

Having said that, I know probably dozens of folks who are unlike the regs here and have had lifestyle changes that meant they decided it was no longer for them. In some cases they still have the germ of an idea they may ever want to go again, but of course that's harder than ever each year. 

Take care, I've enjoyed reading your stuff ?

Hello clarkete,

I'm OK, thanks. Hope that you are too.

I'm not retiring from here. I tried that before (and stated it too) and just kept getting drawn back. Once efests has got you, I think it's got you, on and off, for life!

All the best.  

 

[Flying_Hellfish]

WV unless needs must. I'll go in the longdrops if I absolutely need to.. ain't no way I'm heading back up the hill

[slash's hat]

10 hours ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

Hello clarkete,

I'm OK, thanks. Hope that you are too.

I'm not retiring from here. I tried that before (and stated it too) and just kept getting drawn back. Once efests has got you, I think it's got you, on and off, for life!

All the best.  

 

I'm glad to hear from you, I was slightly worried you had gone on your trip covering Thailand when that storm was hitting. 

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

4 hours ago, slash's hat said:

I'm glad to hear from you, I was slightly worried you had gone on your trip covering Thailand when that storm was hitting. 

Hello slash's hat,

Thanks for your concern, it's appreciated. No, we don't leave for our holiday until latish in March. 

You can't get rid of me that easily! 

[pie_and_a_pint]

On 1/10/2019 at 10:16 AM, Doug85 said:

How did you get to use the backstage ones at acoustic? I worked it last year and feel as though i've missed out on going to any of these! I'm working again this time and going down on the monday so i'm making more of an effort.

 

In answer to the thread, the flushable loo's in the staff field or when out and about i'd go for the compost loo as when they are used right they are the best ones. Long drops are usually just when I need a piss! Something quite disconcerting about the longdrops, the amount of stuff that must get lost down there! I think i've got a fear of dropping my phone in or something. 

Popped to the Acoustic backstage bar for drinkies on Monday and picked up a wristband so I could go in once the festival opened. 

[giantkatestacks]

5 minutes ago, pie_and_a_pint said:

Popped to the Acoustic backstage bar for drinkies on Monday and picked up a wristband so I could go in once the festival opened. 

Gah can you get me one this year, can't get on site until Weds because of the kids. They won't let us in once the fest starts unlike the other crew bars. 

My fave central loos are the ones in the theatre field towards Ped Gate C. I used to love the long drops on the back entrance to Shangri La by Dragon but you can't get access to them now.

[Doug85]

On 1/12/2019 at 1:29 PM, pie_and_a_pint said:

Popped to the Acoustic backstage bar for drinkies on Monday and picked up a wristband so I could go in once the festival opened. 

I'll need to pop in on the Monday this year and pick one up then. I spent a large part of the Monday in 2017 in the Arcadia crew bar and the other in block 9 but didn't get any further wristbands. I'll have to ask around. 

Always wondered if I'd bump into some minor celebs or any of the acts in those places or the backstage part. Would be quite a story to tell the grandkids ?

Better than I saw Martin Roberts off his face in the Park anyway! 

[pie_and_a_pint]

On 1/12/2019 at 1:35 PM, giantkatestacks said:

Gah can you get me one this year, can't get on site until Weds because of the kids. They won't let us in once the fest starts unlike the other crew bars. 

My fave central loos are the ones in the theatre field towards Ped Gate C. I used to love the long drops on the back entrance to Shangri La by Dragon but you can't get access to them now.

Will do! Should be onsite on Monday or possibly even Sunday (depending on whether I decide to go to Tandem Festival that weekend and whether I fancy a night in my own bed inbetween!)

[BigChief]

I never really understand why and how people make such a mess of toilets at festivals, so I generally try squeeze one out whenever I wake up and before they’ve had too much of a chance to get messy again after being cleaned.

Not so keen on the long drops, the wind whistling around my bum seems to put me off lol

[Mr.Tease]

1 hour ago, BigChief said:

I never really understand why and how people make such a mess of toilets at festivals, so I generally try squeeze one out whenever I wake up and before they’ve had too much of a chance to get messy again after being cleaned.

You should try going to the men's toilets at Manchester Piccadilly train stations - absolutely foul! I've never understood how so many people struggle to use a toilet without partially destroying it in the process. I used to have to clean them when I worked in hostels, I have seen such horrors...

[philipsteak]

1 hour ago, Mr.Tease said:

You should try going to the men's toilets at Manchester Piccadilly train stations - absolutely foul! I've never understood how so many people struggle to use a toilet without partially destroying it in the process. I used to have to clean them when I worked in hostels, I have seen such horrors...

I work in a hostel though luckily rarely have to clean a toilet these days. Our housekeepers are pretty hardened to it all, but even they sometimes come downstairs with a look on their face like a young GI who has done one too many tours of 'Nam. If it upsets them you know it was bad

[Tommy Dickfingers]

On 1/10/2019 at 12:08 PM, shuttlep said:

I have a mate (true story not me )

 

 

who can only poop Naked, this includes Glastonbury, i have a photo to prove it 

I used to have to whip my top off. No idea why haha. Nar days I just need peace and quiet. Give me a portaloo any day of the week I’ll lock myself in and just get on with it. 

I’m a big lad I cannot stand going to them long drops, especially for a piss. My full head and shoulders are above the green doors. 

[Bisque]

On 1/12/2019 at 6:25 AM, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

Hello slash's hat,

Thanks for your concern, it's appreciated. No, we don't leave for our holiday until latish in March. 

You can't get rid of me that easily! 

Isn’t that when it starts getting wet? Just got back from there myself for a Xmas holiday & it was quite mild.

 

Anyway I go in any toilet that’s close by, I don’t risk it.

Would be awesome if some of the loos had bum taps though.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

53 minutes ago, Bisque said:

Isn’t that when it starts getting wet? Just got back from there myself for a Xmas holiday & it was quite mild.

 

Anyway I go in any toilet that’s close by, I don’t risk it.

Would be awesome if some of the loos had bum taps though.

Hello Bisque,

I'm fairly sure that the weather will be fine, although I'll admit that I haven't looked in to that part in detail. I'm going to three countries, so expect there to be some kind of variance. That said, I've been to that region several times before roughly around that time before, and it's been t shirt, shorts, and sandals, territory. To be honest, I'd like the weather to be favourable, but it was never a prerequisite to me going. I just happened to stumble across what I thought was a good value holiday, at the same time as getting a bit of a wedge of cash that I wasn't expecting. All I had to do when that heady combination hit me was to talk my wife in to it. Now, you'd think that would be easy. Not so, in my case. Far from it, in fact. 

As to toilets - not Glastonbury related (as someone on here accurately pointed out to me), my best experience ever using a toilet was at a festival (which I now think must have been Wychwood) where I went in to a portaloo. While sat in there contemplating life itself (whilst stoned - natch) I, all of a sudden, had to contemplate death. The reason for this was that I suddenly felt so spectacularly ill that I thought I was going to die, there and then. However, instead of shitting myself (although i was to be found in the best place to be if that was going to happen) I actually felt a wave of serenity sweep all over me. I was actually OK with the idea of dying right there, right then. And do you know what happened next? I'll tell you - I stood up, wiped my bottom with toilet paper, pulled up my underpants and jeans, opened the door, and walked out of the loo. I've never looked back since. I mean, would you? Fuck that for a game of soldiers!

[Ayrshire Chris]

Staying at worthy view this year and I recollect that their lavs are decent. So I will spend the next six months training my bowels to perform in the early morning so that they are synchronised that I don’t have to go when down on the site.  

The long drops next to strummerville and the ones in the woods next to JP are decent.  

As for the blue screen urinals, I’ve always been suspicious of the bbc cameraman in the crane camera at the back of the pyramid field. Taking a piss with his camera pointing down is disconcerting .  

[Havors]

34 minutes ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

Staying at worthy view this year and I recollect that their lavs are decent. So I will spend the next six months training my bowels to perform in the early morning so that they are synchronised that I don’t have to go when down on the site.  

The long drops next to strummerville and the ones in the woods next to JP are decent.  

As for the blue screen urinals, I’ve always been suspicious of the bbc cameraman in the crane camera at the back of the pyramid field. Taking a piss with his camera pointing down is disconcerting .  

 WV toilets were excellent last time. Consistently being cleaned as well for the most part. Theres just some big ass queues anywhere around 8-10am when people start rising. 

The showers were pretty shit, massive massive queues. Everyone has to get undresses in a tent and then walk naked up into the portacabin with the showers in. The shower itself wasnt too bad (hot enough), just the fact there was only about 15-20 showers for a couple of thousand men... not sure what the womens was like. 

The showers at pink moon camping in Isle of Wight festival were frigging excellent... they where like individual pods with a changing area and hanger/mirror in. 

Edited January 16, 2019 by Havors

[Gnomicide]

1 hour ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

As for the blue screen urinals, I’ve always been suspicious of the bbc cameraman in the crane camera at the back of the pyramid field. Taking a piss with his camera pointing down is disconcerting .  

Jesus, how big do you think the zoom lens is?

Or more to the point, how big is....  doesn't matter.

[Ayrshire Chris]

1 hour ago, Gnomicide said:

Jesus, how big do you think the zoom lens is?

Or more to the point, how big is....  doesn't matter.

If they can zoom in on an artists face on the pyramid stage from up in the clouds at the back of the pyramid field then a line of blokes, tackles out, at the base of the camera crane is entirely possible. I still reckon that out takes from the bbc coverage exist and I am on them. 

[ripcurl85]

The long drops near The Wood in 2017 and those in a similar position before hospitality camping moved always seem relatively decent early morning (particularly now that John Peel has moved). A decent spot to get the line up/newspaper/New Statesman out of a morning. Give me an open air long drop in any conditions other than torrential rain, I would much prefer the fresh air.

Incidentally, it's reassuring to read that other people on here are as mystified as I am as to how some people manage to get the toilets into such a state.

I was watching the 2017 highlights package on New Years Day and the thought re. the BBC camera on the elevated platform near the urinals occurred to me. I presume the operators have bigger things on their mind ?   

[Bags73]

The worst toilets from a male perspective are those urinals that have a gap at the bottom by the trough.  I always seem to be opposite some doylum who pees directly into the trough causing "splash-across".    

 

[Ayrshire Chris]

We had a stroll across the festival site during the summer and saw the long drop pits covered with metal sheeting. Felt nostalgic for the iconic green cubicles and that distinctive disinfectant smell. Respect to the water aid volunteers who clean them. 

[Woffy]

On ‎1‎/‎16‎/‎2019 at 12:43 PM, Ayrshire Chris said:

As for the blue screen urinals, I’ve always been suspicious of the bbc cameraman in the crane camera at the back of the pyramid field. Taking a piss with his camera pointing down is disconcerting .  

 

21 hours ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

If they can zoom in on an artists face on the pyramid stage from up in the clouds at the back of the pyramid field then a line of blokes, tackles out, at the base of the camera crane is entirely possible. I still reckon that out takes from the bbc coverage exist and I am on them. 

It works a bit like Green Screen, Chris.

After the festival the BBC takes said out-takes of you pissing in the Glasturinals and then uses CGI to fill in the blue background.

How the BBC staffers drunkenly guffaw at their annual Christmas party as they watch footage of you pissing over Robbie Williams' feshly sanitised hands while a 30ft T-Rex looms over you from behind and an X-Wing fighter screams overhead flown by Phil Collins dressed as Jacob Rees Mogg.

I'd put in a Freedom of Information request if were you.

[Ayrshire Chris]

4 minutes ago, Woffy said:

 

It works a bit like Green Screen, Chris.

After the festival the BBC takes said out-takes of you pissing in the Glasturinals and then uses CGI to fill in the blue background.

How the BBC staffers drunkenly guffaw at their annual Christmas party as they watch footage of you pissing over Robbie Williams' feshly sanitised hands while a 30ft T-Rex looms over you from behind and an X-Wing fighter screams overhead flown by Phil Collins dressed as Jacob Rees Mogg.

I'd put in a Freedom of Information request if were you.

Lot of truth in this. For decades the bbc VT editors Xmas party compiled such a video. I fear they have footage of me urinating whilst watching Coldplay. Dont mind them seeing me pish but watching Coldplay? That’s embarrassing.

[Woffy]

1 minute ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

Lot of truth in this. For decades the bbc VT editors Xmas party compiled such a video. I fear they have footage of me urinating whilst watching Coldplay. Dont mind them seeing me pish but watching Coldplay? That’s embarrassing.

I dunno.

The rainbow effect on your todger from your light-up Coldplay wrist band might've made it look like you were trying to drown / throttle a shaved Care Bear.