Yeah, this is the first year I didn't go since 2003- wasn't ready physically (due to a recent op), or mentally (still processing the past two years with a ll the covid, death, loss and change). I'd been dreading not going for years, but it wasn't as bad as anticipated- had more pangs of wanting to be there rather than a burning desire. I think I had it my brain that if I didn't go once, then I would never allow myself to return for some reason! Which is daft when you think about it😂 It is alright to not go and see how that feels, it doesn't mean you're banned for life