2023 Stage Predictions

[jparx]

Wait, Noel was bad at Glastonbury? I seem to remember him doing some hilarious banter about his new material and then doing about 45 minutes of absolute belters that went down better than anything non-Macca on the Pyramid?

[kingbadger]

Kasabian would be a good indie/rock option in the Pyramid Sub slot for me. It's a bit of a death slot but they've got the energy and live performance to get a crowd on side, as well as plenty of tunes that the casual observer will know. Not exactly hip and happening I know, but would be a good fit for the slot. Still plenty of appetite for indie rock at the festival.

[thewayiam]

54 minutes ago, sisco said:

Noel was unreal at Glasto this year? 

Yeah basically the last 40 mins was okay, from someone there.

[NoBuses]

Kasabian are genuinely better with Serge as front man live than Tom. He really hypes the crowd up and has a great stage presence. 

[Green Croc]

31 minutes ago, Matt42 said:

We are talking about a band here that has lost their front man and is desperately trying not to fall off the face of the earth. “If X can do this then so can Kasabian” is a pretty poor argument when all of the bands listed were at their peak at the time.

Kasabian 2.0 is playing by different rules.

You can't just completely make up an argument that they're desperately trying not to fall off the face of the earth? What by touring and releasing new music? So the same as almost every other band...

 

[Matt42]

20 minutes ago, Green Croc said:

You can't just completely make up an argument that they're desperately trying not to fall off the face of the earth? What by touring and releasing new music? So the same as almost every other band...

 

Well for most bands a substantial lineup change and a controversy would be the kiss of death? Very few often recover. They’ve got back on the road as soon as possible because time is of the essence.

[Green Croc]

14 minutes ago, Matt42 said:

Well for most bands a substantial lineup change and a controversy would be the kiss of death? Very few often recover. They’ve got back on the road as soon as possible because time is of the essence.

You can paint it in a negative light to try and fit your narrative that they don't belong at Glasto because you don't like that genre but I think you're being a bit unfair

[MEGABOWL]

1 hour ago, jparx said:

Wait, Noel was bad at Glastonbury? I seem to remember him doing some hilarious banter about his new material and then doing about 45 minutes of absolute belters that went down better than anything non-Macca on the Pyramid?

I really enjoyed him. Seemed to go over really well judging by the telly footage.

[sisco]

1 hour ago, jparx said:

Wait, Noel was bad at Glastonbury? I seem to remember him doing some hilarious banter about his new material and then doing about 45 minutes of absolute belters that went down better than anything non-Macca on the Pyramid?

Exactly.  That last 40 mins or so singing oasis songs with my mates was brilliant. 

[sisco]

1 hour ago, Matt42 said:

Well for most bands a substantial lineup change and a controversy would be the kiss of death? Very few often recover. They’ve got back on the road as soon as possible because time is of the essence.

Tbf, everyone knew Serge more than Tom anyway

[jj200]

friday night headliner is Coldplay

[gfa]

2 hours ago, sisco said:

Tbf, everyone knew Serge more than Tom anyway

Well, except the courtroom

[TheWaters]

A first ever glasto prediction from me, mostly made out of boredom with fairly limited knowledge and filling the gaps with other peoples predictions so don't go in too hard on any major misplacements:

Friday

PYR: Arctic Monkeys//Royal Blood//Pulp (Special guests)//Paloma Faith//Tears For Fears//Becky Hill//Black Uhuru
OTH: Doja Cat//Jorja Smith//Lily Allen//Michael Kiwanuka//Bloc Party//WizKid//Billy Nomates//Kasabian (Opening Slot)
WH: The Isley Brothers//Mount Kimbie//Salif Keita//Danny Brown

JP: Yeah Yeah Yeahs//Sampha//Everything Everything//Soccer Mommy
PA: Fred Again..//Spoon//Marcus Mumford//Spiritualized

Saturday

PYR: Elton John//Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds//Lil Nas X//The Specials//Wet Leg//Candi Staton
OTH: The National//Lewis Capaldi//Manic Street Preachers//Loyle Carner//Alabama Shakes//Central Cee//Maggie Rogers//Avelino
WH: Jamie xx//SAULT//Mahalia//Young Fathers

JP: Aitch//DMA's//Rina Sawayama//BackRoad Gee
PA: Laura Marling//Bauhaus//Perfume Genius//Snail Mail

Sunday
PYR: Taylor Swift//Lizzo//Paolo Nutini//Spice Girls//Courteeners//Goldfrapp
OTH: The Prodigy//Pixies//The War On Drugs//Belle & Sebastian//Editors//Holly Humberstone//Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes//Kofi Stone
WH: FKA Twigs//Kamasi Washington//Floating Points (Live)//Kokoroko

JP: The Smile//London Grammar//Enter Shikari//The Chats

PA: King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard//Father John Misty//Angel Olsen//Kurt Vile & The Violators

[gfa]

1 hour ago, TheWaters said:

A first ever glasto prediction from me, mostly made out of boredom with fairly limited knowledge and filling the gaps with other peoples predictions so don't go in too hard on any major misplacements:

Friday

PYR: Arctic Monkeys//Royal Blood//Pulp (Special guests)//Paloma Faith//Tears For Fears//Becky Hill//Black Uhuru
OTH: Doja Cat//Jorja Smith//Lily Allen//Michael Kiwanuka//Bloc Party//WizKid//Billy Nomates//Kasabian (Opening Slot)
WH: The Isley Brothers//Mount Kimbie//Salif Keita//Danny Brown

JP: Yeah Yeah Yeahs//Sampha//Everything Everything//Soccer Mommy
PA: Fred Again..//Spoon//Marcus Mumford//Spiritualized

Saturday

PYR: Elton John//Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds//Lil Nas X//The Specials//Wet Leg//Candi Staton
OTH: The National//Lewis Capaldi//Manic Street Preachers//Loyle Carner//Alabama Shakes//Central Cee//Maggie Rogers//Avelino
WH: Jamie xx//SAULT//Mahalia//Young Fathers

JP: Aitch//DMA's//Rina Sawayama//BackRoad Gee
PA: Laura Marling//Bauhaus//Perfume Genius//Snail Mail

Sunday
PYR: Taylor Swift//Lizzo//Paolo Nutini//Spice Girls//Courteeners//Goldfrapp
OTH: The Prodigy//Pixies//The War On Drugs//Belle & Sebastian//Editors//Holly Humberstone//Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes//Kofi Stone
WH: FKA Twigs//Kamasi Washington//Floating Points (Live)//Kokoroko

JP: The Smile//London Grammar//Enter Shikari//The Chats

PA: King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard//Father John Misty//Angel Olsen//Kurt Vile & The Violators

Not sure i can see Courteeners on pyramid, think they are firmly on other - probably in the same slot as 2019.
 

Lots of bad clashes for me - probably early SE corner on saturday mind you! I really can’t see Kasabian opening other, they have no reason to do that slot vs a proper one

[nikkic]

7 hours ago, TheWaters said:

A first ever glasto prediction from me, mostly made out of boredom with fairly limited knowledge and filling the gaps with other peoples predictions so don't go in too hard on any major misplacements:

Friday

PYR: Arctic Monkeys//Royal Blood//Pulp (Special guests)//Paloma Faith//Tears For Fears//Becky Hill//Black Uhuru
OTH: Doja Cat//Jorja Smith//Lily Allen//Michael Kiwanuka//Bloc Party//WizKid//Billy Nomates//Kasabian (Opening Slot)
WH: The Isley Brothers//Mount Kimbie//Salif Keita//Danny Brown

JP: Yeah Yeah Yeahs//Sampha//Everything Everything//Soccer Mommy
PA: Fred Again..//Spoon//Marcus Mumford//Spiritualized

Saturday

PYR: Elton John//Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds//Lil Nas X//The Specials//Wet Leg//Candi Staton
OTH: The National//Lewis Capaldi//Manic Street Preachers//Loyle Carner//Alabama Shakes//Central Cee//Maggie Rogers//Avelino
WH: Jamie xx//SAULT//Mahalia//Young Fathers

JP: Aitch//DMA's//Rina Sawayama//BackRoad Gee
PA: Laura Marling//Bauhaus//Perfume Genius//Snail Mail

Sunday
PYR: Taylor Swift//Lizzo//Paolo Nutini//Spice Girls//Courteeners//Goldfrapp
OTH: The Prodigy//Pixies//The War On Drugs//Belle & Sebastian//Editors//Holly Humberstone//Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes//Kofi Stone
WH: FKA Twigs//Kamasi Washington//Floating Points (Live)//Kokoroko

JP: The Smile//London Grammar//Enter Shikari//The Chats

PA: King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard//Father John Misty//Angel Olsen//Kurt Vile & The Violators

I like this a lot. Stick.

[Guest]

9 hours ago, TheWaters said:

A first ever glasto prediction from me, mostly made out of boredom with fairly limited knowledge and filling the gaps with other peoples predictions so don't go in too hard on any major misplacements:

Friday

PYR: Arctic Monkeys//Royal Blood//Pulp (Special guests)//Paloma Faith//Tears For Fears//Becky Hill//Black Uhuru
OTH: Doja Cat//Jorja Smith//Lily Allen//Michael Kiwanuka//Bloc Party//WizKid//Billy Nomates//Kasabian (Opening Slot)
WH: The Isley Brothers//Mount Kimbie//Salif Keita//Danny Brown

JP: Yeah Yeah Yeahs//Sampha//Everything Everything//Soccer Mommy
PA: Fred Again..//Spoon//Marcus Mumford//Spiritualized

Saturday

PYR: Elton John//Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds//Lil Nas X//The Specials//Wet Leg//Candi Staton
OTH: The National//Lewis Capaldi//Manic Street Preachers//Loyle Carner//Alabama Shakes//Central Cee//Maggie Rogers//Avelino
WH: Jamie xx//SAULT//Mahalia//Young Fathers

JP: Aitch//DMA's//Rina Sawayama//BackRoad Gee
PA: Laura Marling//Bauhaus//Perfume Genius//Snail Mail

Sunday
PYR: Taylor Swift//Lizzo//Paolo Nutini//Spice Girls//Courteeners//Goldfrapp
OTH: The Prodigy//Pixies//The War On Drugs//Belle & Sebastian//Editors//Holly Humberstone//Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes//Kofi Stone
WH: FKA Twigs//Kamasi Washington//Floating Points (Live)//Kokoroko

JP: The Smile//London Grammar//Enter Shikari//The Chats

PA: King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard//Father John Misty//Angel Olsen//Kurt Vile & The Violators

A lot of good stuff here but got a few thoughts.

Tears For Fears and Becky Hill are too low, would work better if you removed someone higher up that day on the Pyramid.

Wizkid is way too low, would surely get a similar slot to Burna Boy this year.

Think Loyle Carner would likely play a different slot as that’s where he played last time. You could move Central Cee there, as reckon he’s a bit low too.

Already been pointed out but can’t see Courteeners playing that slot. Same with Goldfrapp.

[Matt42]

Feel like Becky Hill would probably be an other sub or JP headliner at this point. She’s the epitome of love island music but she’s very popular.

As @SomeoneListeningIn said though, they will stick her on at the same time as an old fogie I reckon, attracting a crowd that couldn’t care less about a Macca or Elton John or Fleetwood Mac playing.

Edited August 23, 2022 by Matt42

[MEGATRONICMEATWAGON]

18 hours ago, Green Croc said:

You can't just completely make up an argument that they're desperately trying not to fall off the face of the earth? What by touring and releasing new music? So the same as almost every other band...

 

Matt often invents narratives from who's popular and who's not, who's worthy, who's not.

[sisco]

12 minutes ago, Matt42 said:

Feel like Becky Hill would probably be an other sub or JP headliner at this point. She’s the epitome of love island music but she’s very popular.

As @SomeoneListeningIn said though, they will stick her on at the same time as an old fogie I reckon, attracting a crowd that couldn’t care less about a Macca or Elton John or Fleetwood Mac playing.

See I thought this but her billing at Victorious says the complete opposite 

[Hugh Jass II]

9 hours ago, TheWaters said:

A first ever glasto prediction from me, mostly made out of boredom with fairly limited knowledge and filling the gaps with other peoples predictions so don't go in too hard on any major misplacements:

Friday

PYR: Arctic Monkeys//Royal Blood//Pulp (Special guests)//Paloma Faith//Tears For Fears//Becky Hill//Black Uhuru
OTH: Doja Cat//Jorja Smith//Lily Allen//Michael Kiwanuka//Bloc Party//WizKid//Billy Nomates//Kasabian (Opening Slot)
WH: The Isley Brothers//Mount Kimbie//Salif Keita//Danny Brown

JP: Yeah Yeah Yeahs//Sampha//Everything Everything//Soccer Mommy
PA: Fred Again..//Spoon//Marcus Mumford//Spiritualized

Saturday

PYR: Elton John//Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds//Lil Nas X//The Specials//Wet Leg//Candi Staton
OTH: The National//Lewis Capaldi//Manic Street Preachers//Loyle Carner//Alabama Shakes//Central Cee//Maggie Rogers//Avelino
WH: Jamie xx//SAULT//Mahalia//Young Fathers

JP: Aitch//DMA's//Rina Sawayama//BackRoad Gee
PA: Laura Marling//Bauhaus//Perfume Genius//Snail Mail

Sunday
PYR: Taylor Swift//Lizzo//Paolo Nutini//Spice Girls//Courteeners//Goldfrapp
OTH: The Prodigy//Pixies//The War On Drugs//Belle & Sebastian//Editors//Holly Humberstone//Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes//Kofi Stone
WH: FKA Twigs//Kamasi Washington//Floating Points (Live)//Kokoroko

JP: The Smile//London Grammar//Enter Shikari//The Chats

PA: King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard//Father John Misty//Angel Olsen//Kurt Vile & The Violators

That Elton/National clash?

[MEGATRONICMEATWAGON]

9 hours ago, TheWaters said:

A first ever glasto prediction from me, mostly made out of boredom with fairly limited knowledge and filling the gaps with other peoples predictions so don't go in too hard on any major misplacements:

Friday

PYR: Arctic Monkeys//Royal Blood//Pulp (Special guests)//Paloma Faith//Tears For Fears//Becky Hill//Black Uhuru
OTH: Doja Cat//Jorja Smith//Lily Allen//Michael Kiwanuka//Bloc Party//WizKid//Billy Nomates//Kasabian (Opening Slot)
WH: The Isley Brothers//Mount Kimbie//Salif Keita//Danny Brown

JP: Yeah Yeah Yeahs//Sampha//Everything Everything//Soccer Mommy
PA: Fred Again..//Spoon//Marcus Mumford//Spiritualized

Saturday

PYR: Elton John//Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds//Lil Nas X//The Specials//Wet Leg//Candi Staton
OTH: The National//Lewis Capaldi//Manic Street Preachers//Loyle Carner//Alabama Shakes//Central Cee//Maggie Rogers//Avelino
WH: Jamie xx//SAULT//Mahalia//Young Fathers

JP: Aitch//DMA's//Rina Sawayama//BackRoad Gee
PA: Laura Marling//Bauhaus//Perfume Genius//Snail Mail

Sunday
PYR: Taylor Swift//Lizzo//Paolo Nutini//Spice Girls//Courteeners//Goldfrapp
OTH: The Prodigy//Pixies//The War On Drugs//Belle & Sebastian//Editors//Holly Humberstone//Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes//Kofi Stone
WH: FKA Twigs//Kamasi Washington//Floating Points (Live)//Kokoroko

JP: The Smile//London Grammar//Enter Shikari//The Chats

PA: King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard//Father John Misty//Angel Olsen//Kurt Vile & The Violators

Noooooo, KG&TLW clashing with Prodigy!

I like Pixies into Prodigy a lot.

Would stick on this too. 

[thewayiam]

10 hours ago, TheWaters said:

A first ever glasto prediction from me, mostly made out of boredom with fairly limited knowledge and filling the gaps with other peoples predictions so don't go in too hard on any major misplacements:

Friday

PYR: Arctic Monkeys//Royal Blood//Pulp (Special guests)//Paloma Faith//Tears For Fears//Becky Hill//Black Uhuru
OTH: Doja Cat//Jorja Smith//Lily Allen//Michael Kiwanuka//Bloc Party//WizKid//Billy Nomates//Kasabian (Opening Slot)
WH: The Isley Brothers//Mount Kimbie//Salif Keita//Danny Brown

JP: Yeah Yeah Yeahs//Sampha//Everything Everything//Soccer Mommy
PA: Fred Again..//Spoon//Marcus Mumford//Spiritualized

Saturday

PYR: Elton John//Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds//Lil Nas X//The Specials//Wet Leg//Candi Staton
OTH: The National//Lewis Capaldi//Manic Street Preachers//Loyle Carner//Alabama Shakes//Central Cee//Maggie Rogers//Avelino
WH: Jamie xx//SAULT//Mahalia//Young Fathers

JP: Aitch//DMA's//Rina Sawayama//BackRoad Gee
PA: Laura Marling//Bauhaus//Perfume Genius//Snail Mail

Sunday
PYR: Taylor Swift//Lizzo//Paolo Nutini//Spice Girls//Courteeners//Goldfrapp
OTH: The Prodigy//Pixies//The War On Drugs//Belle & Sebastian//Editors//Holly Humberstone//Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes//Kofi Stone
WH: FKA Twigs//Kamasi Washington//Floating Points (Live)//Kokoroko

JP: The Smile//London Grammar//Enter Shikari//The Chats

PA: King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard//Father John Misty//Angel Olsen//Kurt Vile & The Violators

Friday is great.

[Green Croc]

11 hours ago, TheWaters said:

A first ever glasto prediction from me, mostly made out of boredom with fairly limited knowledge and filling the gaps with other peoples predictions so don't go in too hard on any major misplacements:

Friday

PYR: Arctic Monkeys//Royal Blood//Pulp (Special guests)//Paloma Faith//Tears For Fears//Becky Hill//Black Uhuru
OTH: Doja Cat//Jorja Smith//Lily Allen//Michael Kiwanuka//Bloc Party//WizKid//Billy Nomates//Kasabian (Opening Slot)
WH: The Isley Brothers//Mount Kimbie//Salif Keita//Danny Brown

JP: Yeah Yeah Yeahs//Sampha//Everything Everything//Soccer Mommy
PA: Fred Again..//Spoon//Marcus Mumford//Spiritualized

Saturday

PYR: Elton John//Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds//Lil Nas X//The Specials//Wet Leg//Candi Staton
OTH: The National//Lewis Capaldi//Manic Street Preachers//Loyle Carner//Alabama Shakes//Central Cee//Maggie Rogers//Avelino
WH: Jamie xx//SAULT//Mahalia//Young Fathers

JP: Aitch//DMA's//Rina Sawayama//BackRoad Gee
PA: Laura Marling//Bauhaus//Perfume Genius//Snail Mail

Sunday
PYR: Taylor Swift//Lizzo//Paolo Nutini//Spice Girls//Courteeners//Goldfrapp
OTH: The Prodigy//Pixies//The War On Drugs//Belle & Sebastian//Editors//Holly Humberstone//Frank Carter & The Rattlesnakes//Kofi Stone
WH: FKA Twigs//Kamasi Washington//Floating Points (Live)//Kokoroko

JP: The Smile//London Grammar//Enter Shikari//The Chats

PA: King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard//Father John Misty//Angel Olsen//Kurt Vile & The Violators

Big fan of this, although AM, YYYs and Fred Again is a brutal clash Friday.

Swap Jamie XX and FKA Twigs round as well so I could see Elton clash free and that would be 👌

[1986]

It's funny how any tough clashes I find on people's done for fun totally speculative predictions still put that "for fuck sake" feeling in me.

[Matt42]

Friday

Pyramid: Arctic Monkeys // Doja Cat // Royal Blood // The Specials 

Other Stage: The Prodigy // Rex Orange County // Rosalia

West Holts: Kano

John Peel: FKA TWIGS

Park: PJ Harvey

Saturday

Pyramid: Taylor Swift // Pulp // Lil Nas X // Camila Cabello

Other Stage: Courteeners // Anderson. Paak & The Free Nationals // Robyn

West Holts: Chase and Status 

John Peel: Yeah Yeah Yeah’s

Park: Fred Again…

Sunday

Pyramid: Elton John // Lizzo // Paul Weller // Spice Girls

Other Stage: Jorja Smith // J Hus // Father John Misty

West Holts: Michael Kiwanuka 

John Peel: Aitch

Park: Sigur Ros

Edited August 23, 2022 by Matt42