Overheards and Funnies

[Bisque]

I suppose most of us have heard "GET YOUR BREAKFAST. K, PILLS, MANDY" from a bloke walking around with one of those cinema type body trays.

[WS_Jack_III]

I've always thought you were a wrong'n. lol

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

I was a little worried that that might have been taken the wrong way. Me paranoid - I don't know what you are talking about!

[WS_Jack_III]

All fun and games on here innit

[Keithy]

This happened to me one year. I was with a friend actually in front right of the pyramid stage leaning against the railings talking when someone came up and asked us where the pyramid stage was. They were serious too.

I've had "where is the rabbit hole?"....whilst stood in front of a massive white rabbit.

[Bignews]

on phone "my phone is running out of battery, so where shall we meet?.... okay, i'll see you by the wolves flag... okay, bye"

walks in to pyramid field

turns around to me and says "oh that was lucky, my phone just completely died"

"OH FUCK, theres 3 Fucking wolves flags"

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

I've had "where is the rabbit hole?"....whilst stood in front of a massive white rabbit.

I was once clutching on to the grass next to our tents at Webbs Ash when I saw a rabbit hurtle at stunning velocity towards the ground. I had lost all sense that gravity existed and was trying to keep a hold of mother earth via the grass I was holding on to. So, it was somewhat startling to know that this rabbit was experiencing a distinct gravitational force. Anyway, it hit the deck and ran off rapidly. I asked my mate if he'd seen it. He said he hadn't, but that he definitely heard it.

Apologies - repeating yourself is the curse of the old.

[bennyboi]

I have no experience with this but i wouldn't have thought they would be ejected from site. Unless of course they are behaving in a way that screams arrest me or they are that bad they need hospital.

I can remember when I fell on a load of glass in 09 n waited 3 hours for stitches because there was a que off people deep into k holes getting priority and the nurse seeing to me said that generally a friend waits with them n just walls them bk to the tent when they are in a safe state.

[Michaels denim shorts]

Walking up the railway at silly o'clock, & heard one guy say to another awww mate, no, nooooo, to then noticed said guy wearing white shorts attempting to piss at the side had infact shat himself royally, never seen such a mess

I nearly died laughing

[alframsey]

I've re-read every page of this thread and my god it is wonderful! I hadn't wen feeling in the mood until I happened across this gem again. Thanks everybody!

[sheffieldlady]

Another one for the late night readers.. Someone had kindly decided to shit next to a friends tent.. After spending some hours in SE corner we returned, said friend trips over the guy ropes and falls into the shit. All she said was "who would shit next to my tent? The bastards" for about 5 minutes. It was funny at the time. The following morning she wondered off for a shower thanks to Greenpeace. She is still upset by it to this day! Never fully recovered. Still, makes me laugh when i think about her reaction.

[theDandy]

all of these are fantastic

[AmyShambles]

In 2014, I overheard a fella on the phone who was aranging to meet up with someone. He was stood right in front of the Greenpeace mechanical polar bear and said, 'Yeah mate, you'll see me, I'm stood in front of that big roaring dog'. Really made me chuckle.

[4AssedMonkey]

Last years funniest overheard walking past the Chameleon on the way to the Pyramid, gang of young lads: "OK I'll go but I've never even heard of Burnt Back & Crack."  I turned expecting a wry smile at the clever word play, but no - deadly serious.

[fightoffyour]

On 21/03/2015 at 10:09 PM, briddj said:

2009 on the lazy Sunday, walking near the Pyramid after coming back from the bar - mate slips over on A BANANA SKIN onto his arse. He did it with great skill though and didn't spill any of the six beers he was carrying! That has gone down in legend.

 

A BANANA SKIN!

This seems very familiar, in that I've definitely seen someone slipping over a banana skin, presumably at a festival, and just been amazed that that actually happened. A BANANA SKIN! I do hope it was your mate that I saw.

[worthyraver]

I must admit I never heard this directly but saw it on here years and years ago, subsequently I re-posted it and the original poster saw it and said: "I was the one that saw and heard that"

Here is hoping he notices again:

Someone inside in tent was doing a big line whilst wearing a head torch a passing wit shouts: "Put that light out it's like a bat symbol for cocaine abuse"

[The Nal]

Posted in another thread but...

I was watching Emiliana Torrini through a hole in the side of the Guardian tent one year. Tent was rammed. There were a load of people outside watching as you could hear it clearly outside the tent. Singing in her lovely Icelandic voice. Some loudmouth lad was walking by and shouted "whos playing in there?". 

Some bloke beside me instantly snapped back: "Phil Collins". 

[richroet]

On 3/23/2015 at 10:45 PM, Bignews said:

on phone "my phone is running out of battery, so where shall we meet?.... okay, i'll see you by the wolves flag... okay, bye"

 

walks in to pyramid field

 

turns around to me and says "oh that was lucky, my phone just completely died"

 

"OH FUCK, theres 3 Fucking wolves flags"

Yam Yams everywhere!

[Henrik]

I overheard a young boy talking to his dad. I will never forget this:

Young Boy: Dad, why do bees sting you?

Dad: 'Cos they got a fucking attitude problem

 

[mb'satglasto]

2013. After walking round for ages with my rather spangled friend as he was being really picky about getting something to eat, he finally decided to order food from a stall called 'The Hippy Chip Van'

 

Given that their choice of food was probably not too diverse or complex, I sat patiently waiting for him nearby watching him stand at the van where there was absolutely no queue. 5 minutes later he returned empty handed.

me: 'what happened there?'

 

friend: 'the menu was too confusing.'

[stuartbert two hats]

29 minutes ago, mb'satglasto said:

2013. After walking round for ages with my rather spangled friend as he was being really picky about getting something to eat, he finally decided to order food from a stall called 'The Hippy Chip Van'

 

Given that their choice of food was probably not too diverse or complex, I sat patiently waiting for him nearby watching him stand at the van where there was absolutely no queue. 5 minutes later he returned empty handed.

me: 'what happened there?'

 

friend: 'the menu was too confusing.'

If it wasn't for the fact that I didn't go in 2013, I would have sworn that story was about me.

[Harmonic Prospector]

When Lionel Ritchie was having his Glasto Moment after Dancing On The Ceiling.

Lionel:What the hell is going on?! Glastonberry, What The Hell Is Going On??!! 

Dude next to me: Lionel's acid has kicked in! 

[Charm]

In 2005 we awoke to the sounds of people shouting "wake up, wake up there's a river running through your tent". 
Charm x