Best and worst toilets on site (AKA where the shit doesn't end until the festival does)

[yehbutnobut]

Strangely loving this thread.

Favourite loos are up the top of the hill of death in campervan east, generally pretty clean, and if you’re desperate, make you pick up your pace ascending the hill.

Think I’ve mentioned this before here, but in 2016, mate of mine left us at the Pyramid to go for what was to be an explosive number 2. He walked all the way back to these toilets, backed in quickly, dropped his kecks, but unfortunately forgot about lifting his kagool at the back... Needless to say the ‘splash back’ directed things back towards and into his lowered trousers causing him all sorts of trouble & sorrow.

Learning this when we met up a few hours later on-site, not only did the aftermath sound harrowing, it took me a while to pick myself up off the floor.

 

Edited January 27, 2021 by yehbutnobut

[Wellyboot]

Somebody had the longdrop clang and I'd absolutely love to hear it if you see this post x

[BlueDaze]

7 hours ago, Hugh Jass said:

Said this before but I was in the longdrops by the John Peel when the lightning storm started in 2014. Realising that I was sat in a metal box my first thought was “I’m going to die having a poo at Glastonbury”.

Worse ways to go I suppose.

I thought i was going to die on a toilet in 2014 (Ridge & Furrow)... before Bryan Ferry took the stage on West Holts..

The world fell out of my bottom as the old saying goes... That night was the worst i have ever felt at Glastonbury.. i had to head back to CV East and my bed (stopping at every toilet on the way back - some of them twice)

I was woken in a cold sweat by what sounded like Metallica playing in my caravan... i would have shit myself again but....

Would agree that the portaloos in CV East are a delight on an early morning after the cleaning crew have been... On-site, i too would go out of my way to visit the compost loos at bottom of sacred space... 10/10

 

 

[priest17]

2 hours ago, yehbutnobut said:

Strangely loving this thread.

Favourite loos are up the top of the hill of death in campervan east, generally pretty clean, and if you’re desperate, make you pick up your pace ascending the hill.

Think I’ve mentioned this before here, but in 2016, mate of mine left us at the Pyramid to go for what was to be an explosive number 2. He walked all the way back to these toilets, backed in quickly, dropped his kegs, but unfortunately forgot about lifting his kagool at the back... Needless to say the ‘splash back’ directed things back towards and into his lowered trousers causing him all sorts of trouble & sorry.

Learning this when we met up a few hours later on-site, not only did the aftermath sound harrowing, it took me a while to pick myself up off the floor.

 

At least it was 2016 so there was plenty of mud about for some camouflage action!

Ya gotta feel for anyone having toilet problems at a festival, the way you live for that week that stuff can happen to anyone.

[stuartbert two hats]

1 hour ago, Wellyboot said:

Somebody had the longdrop clang and I'd absolutely love to hear it if you see this post x

https://www.dropbox.com/s/cy4k4t2vdie2pks/longdrop.mp3?dl=0

[kalifire]

Best: uncovered long drops at the top of Pennards, near the entrance to the Park. There's some sentimentality involved here - they're the closest to where I usually camp and the first and last visits I make each festival. Also, minimal queues and plenty of toilets.

Worst: uncovered long drops at the bottom of Pennards, near the railways track and Glade. Always overcrowded, filthy, smelly.

[Tranquility of Solitude]

Already done my best and worst, but a special mention to the ones at the side of Williams Green first thing in the morning. Cleaned around 7am with a cracking coffee and doughnut place nearby to get things moving along if required.

[Wellyboot]

9 hours ago, stuartbert two hats said:

https://www.dropbox.com/s/cy4k4t2vdie2pks/longdrop.mp3?dl=0

My hero 😍

(I cant seem to upvote you??)

((....or anyone actually! Am i broken? Have i done something wrong??))

Edited January 27, 2021 by Wellyboot
not sure what ive done :(

[Gnomicide]

6 minutes ago, Wellyboot said:

My hero 😍

(I cant seem to upvote you??)

((....or anyone actually! Am i broken? Have i done something wrong??))

Looks like the option has gone for everyone. 

 

Or just you and me.

Either way, everyone's count has disappeared. 

Edited January 27, 2021 by Gnomicide

[Crazyfool01]

Just now, Gnomicide said:

Looks like the option has gone for everyone. 

 

Or just you and me.

Nope it’s all of us ... 

[Wellyboot]

1 minute ago, Gnomicide said:

Looks like the option has gone for everyone. 

 

Or just you and me.

😆 well I did think I'd done something wrong - unless its a cat gif I'm pretty useless at the computers HA! 

Just now, crazyfool1 said:

Nope it’s all of us ... 

But nope its us all. How sad, I was doing quite well too! AND my trophy of winning the day on NYE has gone I was so proud of that 🤣 

[Tranquility of Solitude]

10 hours ago, kalifire said:

Best: uncovered long drops at the top of Pennards, near the entrance to the Park. There's some sentimentality involved here - they're the closest to where I usually camp and the first and last visits I make each festival. Also, minimal queues and plenty of toilets.

Worst: uncovered long drops at the bottom of Pennards, near the railways track and Glade. Always overcrowded, filthy, smelly.

Can’t argue with your worst, they are terrible, but very surprised by your best choice. These sound like the ones nearest where I camped in 2015 (Camplight were there) and I didn’t think they were the best. They also get very busy when Stonebridge Bar and or Park stage have anything well attended. Added to that, you now have the discomfort of people viewing you from The Pier (unless that’s your thing!). I’ve also seen more people going in the hedgerow there than anywhere else on site.

[hfuhruhurr]

on the shewee malarkey, wife and daughter practiced in the shower before going. Wife said "emergencies only", daughter "bollocks to that". But she's fine with traveljanes.

Had to laugh at Download - the women next to me had a bucket - extolled the virtues of in-tent facilities.

Then they kicked it over by mistake.

[hfuhruhurr]

My 1000th post will not be about weeing.

 

Oh crap.

[Copperface]

17 hours ago, Wellyboot said:

Somebody had the longdrop clang and I'd absolutely love to hear it if you see this post x

Hi Res Clanger version remix

longdrop (1).mp3

[kalifire]

9 hours ago, Tranquility of Solitude said:

Can’t argue with your worst, they are terrible, but very surprised by your best choice. These sound like the ones nearest where I camped in 2015 (Camplight were there) and I didn’t think they were the best. They also get very busy when Stonebridge Bar and or Park stage have anything well attended. Added to that, you now have the discomfort of people viewing you from The Pier (unless that’s your thing!). I’ve also seen more people going in the hedgerow there than anywhere else on site.

It’s about timing, I guess. That area takes a little while to get rammed and I tend to use it in the morning before setting off on my adventures, and at night before I collapse. At those times I’ve never had any issues. Toilets are usually immediately available, clean and don’t stink. But I take your point about the pier. 

I also enjoy (which feels odd to say about a toilet but it’s all part of the Glasto experience for me!) the compost toilets next to the Rumshack. Mainly because it’s brilliant to nip out for a quick pee, then straight back in the shack. Queues can vary. 

[stuartbert two hats]

There's a set of longdrops just outside Bailey's, which are pretty good, mainly because they're not used so much.  Fucking stank at one point in 2014 though.

Actually they're awful.

[BlueDaze]

55 minutes ago, stuartbert two hats said:

There's a set of longdrops just outside Bailey's, which are pretty good, mainly because they're not used so much.  Fucking stank at one point in 2014 though.

Actually they're awful.

your 23,000th post and you are arguing with yourself...... 😁

[stuartbert two hats]

12 minutes ago, BlueDaze said:

your 23,000th post and you are arguing with yourself...... 😁

About a toilet! 😂😂😂

[BlueDaze]

4 minutes ago, stuartbert two hats said:

About a toilet! 😂😂😂

Cabin Fever

[Charm]

I got trapped in a compost toilet cubicle so it has put me off using them, will be sticking to the long drops. 
Charm x

[Wellyboot]

1 hour ago, Charm said:

I got trapped in a compost toilet cubicle so it has put me off using them, will be sticking to the long drops. 
Charm x

Oh no!!! How did that happen? 😮 The door got stuck? How did you get out?

[Funkyfairy!]

The longdrops along the railway track , any of them, along there, especially nearer to SE corner you get, I hate them, always get stage fright in them .... 

The longdrops by the astrolobe in theatre and circus are normally OK(ish) 

[Charm]

2 hours ago, Wellyboot said:

Oh no!!! How did that happen? 😮 The door got stuck? How did you get out?

Yeah the door was just stuck, had to call my OH and he somehow managed to open it, was a bit twatted though and it’s not the first time I’ve got myself trapped in a toilet. 
Charm x

[Wellyboot]

4 minutes ago, Charm said:

Yeah the door was just stuck, had to call my OH and he somehow managed to open it, was a bit twatted though and it’s not the first time I’ve got myself trapped in a toilet. 
Charm x

Oh no!! At least you managed to get rescued! Bet that was a relief! X