The MERRY CHRISTMAS Thread!

[baggienick68]

Merry Christmas to one and all. They seem to be rattling through the vaccinations so fingers crossed for 2021. Stay safe. x

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

1 hour ago, Losing my hair said:

Merry Christmas Yog,

Sorry to hear about your dad, I remember when my dad died how concerned we were about my mum who just couldn't be bothered to eat because she was only cooking for one and it always reminded her of my dad. Over time she improved and now makes sure that she eats properly - she doesn't have the underlying health conditions that your mother has though.

I've lived on my own for a few years now, I'm on my own today, but I actually quite enjoy it. That probably says more about my anti-social personality than anything else, but I really like not having to compromise with somebody else. However I have not yet reached the point of wandering around the supermarket muttering to myself - although apparently sane people appear to be doing this until I realise that they are on the phone.

Have a good day.

Thanks for sharing, as they say down the AA, and probably other help / self help meetings too. I tell you what, if you ever get bored of being on your tod LMH, then you could do no better than get yourself down an AA meeting, even if alcohol isn't a problem for you. I know it's wrong and I'll probably go to hell, but some of the stories you'll hear are hilarious. However, I will admit that some stories are harrowing too. Nobody said it was a free gift! 

The best AA story that I heard was a then rich oap lady once went out on the lash in Birmingham and ended up coming around amongst loads of different vegetables on a concrete floor in the storage area of the restaurant that she had finally passed out in. However, this restaurant wasn't in the UK. It wasn't even in Europe. It was in Israel. And I'll happily swear on my own life that that lady was not lying or fantasising. My own wife, who once went to the AA (well before my time) and heard a story from a lady who declared that she'd turned to drink because of having to fully look after her then suddenly disabled husband a fair few years back. Anyway, they lived on the coast and one day she wheeled her husband up to the top of a cliff in his wheelchair, so that they could look out at and appreciate the beauty. Then she started drinking. Anyway there came a point when she came around on the cliff edge and her husband had gone. She never got done for it, but declared that she seemed to recall knocking the break on his wheelchair while getting another bottle of booze from the basket underneath his seating area. The fucker had rolled off the cliff to his death below. 

Now, I know full well that I shouldn't and that it's wrong on most levels, but wouldn't you like to have been a fly on the wing of a seagull watching that bloke initially jump start into motion and then watch the whole lot from there onwards. I can't help it. It's just too funny!

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

1 hour ago, crazyfool1 said:

this is very different to what I see from many customers ... nice one for being happy 🙂 

Cheers crazyfool1. 🙂

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

1 hour ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

You are not alone, I’d sit next to you on bus. ! 

Don't tell the men in the white coats that, as they'll certainly section for sure.

In reality, thank you, that's a lovely thing to hear.

Now, don't ask me why I'm mentioning this but your mention of a bus triggered a memory of being on the No. 11 bus in Birmingham (the Outer Circle) when I was coming back from school, aged 11 or 12. Anyway, this big fat bastard comes and sits next to me. Then he moved his one leg over mine as to trap my nearest leg to him. Then he started fiddling with himself, having stuck one of his hands down into his pants to enable such a thing. Then he started to grunt an groan - a lot. I really didn't know about sex and all that lark then, so hadn't got a fucking clue what this bloke was up to. All I knew is that I didn't like the situation, but politely stayed there letting him do what he wanted / needed to do, and then legged it from there when it was my stop. If I knew then what I know now, then I'd have charged him at least a fiver for that kind of carry on. I dare say that I'd have gone down on him for £20. Can you just imagine how many lucky bags you can buy for £20?

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

My Lord, I've seen it all now. My mates just sent me this. I haven't actually seen his new home, but I simply can't rule out this actually being a photo taken by him;

[zahidf]

[zahidf]

[Crazyfool01]

5 minutes ago, zahidf said:

and there was me thinking id Avoided the Christmas cracker jokes for the year 🙂 

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

50 minutes ago, zahidf said:

Could be worse (actual lie), Father Christmas could be banned from going down chimneys on elf & safety grounds. Which goes to prove that the lie I mentioned earlier was actually a lie itself. So, it was a lie lie. Now we all know two lies don't make a lie, they make the truth. So, I declare that no matter what the quality content of the bollocks that I just wrote is, it is not a lie. Therefore it must be the truth - post hoc ergo propter hoc. 

[Ayrshire Chris]

5 hours ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

Don't tell the men in the white coats that, as they'll certainly section for sure.

In reality, thank you, that's a lovely thing to hear.

Now, don't ask me why I'm mentioning this but your mention of a bus triggered a memory of being on the No. 11 bus in Birmingham (the Outer Circle) when I was coming back from school, aged 11 or 12. Anyway, this big fat bastard comes and sits next to me. Then he moved his one leg over mine as to trap my nearest leg to him. Then he started fiddling with himself, having stuck one of his hands down into his pants to enable such a thing. Then he started to grunt an groan - a lot. I really didn't know about sex and all that lark then, so hadn't got a fucking clue what this bloke was up to. All I knew is that I didn't like the situation, but politely stayed there letting him do what he wanted / needed to do, and then legged it from there when it was my stop. If I knew then what I know now, then I'd have charged him at least a fiver for that kind of carry on. I dare say that I'd have gone down on him for £20. Can you just imagine how many lucky bags you can buy for £20?

You cant ever have too many lucky bags!😁

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

2 hours ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

You cant ever have too many lucky bags!😁

The thing is. The thing is, this - I wasn't really that into lucky bags, and especially not so at the age of 11 to 12. I was kind of using a little poetic licence back there when I said that. Mind you, I'm not really (and have never been) into noshing on fat male w*nkers stumps on the top deck of the No 11 bus in Birmingham. Any rumours' that you hear to the contrary are just that - rumours'.

[DareToDibble]

2 hours ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

Could be worse (actual lie), Father Christmas could be banned from going down chimneys on elf & safety grounds. Which goes to prove that the lie I mentioned earlier was actually a lie itself. So, it was a lie lie. Now we all know two lies don't make a lie, they make the truth. So, I declare that no matter what the quality content of the bollocks that I just wrote is, it is not a lie. Therefore it must be the truth - post hoc ergo propter hoc. 

Right now I read this and found it incredibly entertaining.

20 minutes ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

The thing is. The thing is, this - I wasn't really that into lucky bags, and especially not so at the age of 11 to 12. I was kind of using a little poetic licence back there when I said that. Mind you, I'm not really (and have never been) into noshing on fat male w*nkers stumps on the top deck of the No 11 bus in Birmingham. Any rumours' that you hear to the contrary are just that - rumours'.

Then I read this - and the original part of the number 11 bus story (a few times to make sure I hadn’t gone mad) and am now deeply disturbed.

Not sure if I’m meant to be laughing or crying by this point.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

40 minutes ago, DareToDibble said:

Right now I read this and found it incredibly entertaining.

Then I read this - and the original part of the number 11 bus story (a few times to make sure I hadn’t gone mad) and am now deeply disturbed.

Not sure if I’m meant to be laughing or crying by this point.

Oh, I'd laugh if I were you. You might think that my mentioning 'it' at all means that I give 'it' some value. I don't. It was the same with the school metalwork teacher and the local Roman Catholic priest. Well, not quite the same in that they didn'#t get their leg over, so to speak. The metalwork teacher in the end kind of 'knew' not to go for it. He was later put in prison for a fair few years for it. Then our local priest tried it on with not only me, but I was with my cousin and one of his mates too at the time - I was about 15 then. He also got sent down, but for a longer time than the teacher. 

None of the above matters, so please don't worry. I'm sure that that kind of thing would bother others, but it doesn't me. I really only mentioned it in the first place because Ayrshire Chris's post reminded me of the No. 11 bus incident. It's no different to somebody else saying something about Glastonbury on here that sparks off another memory. My own memory is failing at quite a non healthy rate now, so to remember lots of moments in my life takes these kind of catalystic moments. Although not completely watertight, I'd sooner be 'granted' my memories, warts and all, than to not have access to them again.

So, please do have a laugh. It'll not be at my expense because, as i said before, I give it no credence. 🙂

[stt11]

6 hours ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

Oh, I'd laugh if I were you. You might think that my mentioning 'it' at all means that I give 'it' some value. I don't. It was the same with the school metalwork teacher and the local Roman Catholic priest. Well, not quite the same in that they didn'#t get their leg over, so to speak. The metalwork teacher in the end kind of 'knew' not to go for it. He was later put in prison for a fair few years for it. Then our local priest tried it on with not only me, but I was with my cousin and one of his mates too at the time - I was about 15 then. He also got sent down, but for a longer time than the teacher. 

None of the above matters, so please don't worry. I'm sure that that kind of thing would bother others, but it doesn't me. I really only mentioned it in the first place because Ayrshire Chris's post reminded me of the No. 11 bus incident. It's no different to somebody else saying something about Glastonbury on here that sparks off another memory. My own memory is failing at quite a non healthy rate now, so to remember lots of moments in my life takes these kind of catalystic moments. Although not completely watertight, I'd sooner be 'granted' my memories, warts and all, than to not have access to them again.

So, please do have a laugh. It'll not be at my expense because, as i said before, I give it no credence. 🙂

I was giving out random likes earlier and accidentally liked the post with the Saville you tube. Has this triggered this drunken diatribe of yours? 
Nothing good really comes of considering issues like Saville on blogs. That’s my opinion any way. 
 

I only liked the post by accident. Shall we just try to get @eFestivalsto delete the thread, from that post to here? It would make me happy. It also sounds like a fun thing to do with the Merry Christmas thread? 

I’m up for it. Shall we just annoy everyone by deleting their Christmas greetings on Boxing Day?

[Homer]

Morning all! Hope everyone is up and at em and ready to go again! X

[Kalopsia]

31 minutes ago, Homer said:

Morning all! Hope everyone is up and at em and ready to go again! X

Just stretching for a run, thinking a long slow fat burner then straight home and shovelling turkey/ham sandwiches! 

[Crazyfool01]

13 minutes ago, Kalopsia said:

Just stretching for a run, thinking a long slow fat burner then straight home and shovelling turkey/ham sandwiches! 

do you sleep walk just out of interest ? 🙂 

[Homer]

35 minutes ago, Kalopsia said:

Just stretching for a run, thinking a long slow fat burner then straight home and shovelling turkey/ham sandwiches! 

Good for you mate! I managed weights and a bike ride yesterday morning - but am struggling to get there today, despite being hangover-free. Feels like it’s needed though!

Edited December 26, 2020 by Homer

[Hugh Jass]

Saving the run for tomorrow. Think if I attempted it now I’d have a coronary.

[guypjfreak]

It's over... Wooooooooooooooop hope you all had a good one 

Had a lovely day with grandchildren and baby Eliza doing well 

4 cans of cider most sober I've ever been on a Xmas day.. 

Peace and tea. Guyoldson 

[Kalopsia]

1 hour ago, Homer said:

Good for you mate! I managed weights and a bike ride yesterday morning - but am struggling to get there today, despite being hangover-free. Feels like it’s needed though!

A wonderful 10km in the drizzle! 

 

1 hour ago, crazyfool1 said:

do you sleep walk just out of interest ? 🙂 

I've been known too, yes😂

[oneeye]

2 hours ago, Kalopsia said:

Just stretching for a run, thinking a long slow fat burner then straight home and shovelling turkey/ham sandwiches! 

Just sweated out the over indulgence from yesterday, a 1 hour muddy plod, didn't see a soul; bliss.

Countdown now on to day 2 of over indulgence.

Forgot to post this yesterday, a beauty of a sun rise here in Devon; have a safe and peaceful one pop pickers 😎🎅

Edited December 26, 2020 by oneeye

[Padjeq]

14 hours ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

Oh, I'd laugh if I were you. You might think that my mentioning 'it' at all means that I give 'it' some value. I don't. It was the same with the school metalwork teacher and the local Roman Catholic priest. Well, not quite the same in that they didn'#t get their leg over, so to speak. The metalwork teacher in the end kind of 'knew' not to go for it. He was later put in prison for a fair few years for it. Then our local priest tried it on with not only me, but I was with my cousin and one of his mates too at the time - I was about 15 then. He also got sent down, but for a longer time than the teacher. 

None of the above matters, so please don't worry. I'm sure that that kind of thing would bother others, but it doesn't me. I really only mentioned it in the first place because Ayrshire Chris's post reminded me of the No. 11 bus incident. It's no different to somebody else saying something about Glastonbury on here that sparks off another memory. My own memory is failing at quite a non healthy rate now, so to remember lots of moments in my life takes these kind of catalystic moments. Although not completely watertight, I'd sooner be 'granted' my memories, warts and all, than to not have access to them again.

So, please do have a laugh. It'll not be at my expense because, as i said before, I give it no credence. 🙂

What school did you go to? I used to catch the 11 on my way to Edmund Campion

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

57 minutes ago, Padjeq said:

What school did you go to? I used to catch the 11 on my way to Edmund Campion

Hello Padjeq,

I went to King Edward Camp Hill School for Boys. At that time my family lived in South Yardley (near to The Swan). Fortunately this bloke only started doing his business a few stops from The Swan, so I only had to endure it for a while. Not having any idea about such things at that time, I don't know whether he 'concluded' in my presence, or not. 

My first school was St. Thomas Moore's in Sheldon. My three older brothers were at St Phillips (RC) on the Hagley Road, so I was originally destined to go there for a secondary school. However, they turned it into a sixth form college before I could get into it, so my parents looked for somewhere else with a 'good reputation', so made me do the two exams for there on two consecutive Saturday afternoon's. Anyway, little did they (or anybody but us potential candidates from our primary school)know, but our primary school had already given us a 100% identical mock paper to one of the 'exams;' on the first Saturday of the Kings Edward's exam. So from point one I had already got 100% of that paper correct (as did all those who tried from my primary school). I then must have got enough in the second paper to get through and into the school.

And then it dawned on me - I was with people who had been to places like the Blue Coat School in Edgbaston. These people had already learned thing's like French at that school, so were well, well more advanced that the 'mob' of delinquents that came from my school. As a result I always used to come last or second last in my class on an overall basis. There was a time when I came 4th in Physics because I studied it because the teacher was such a nice bloke that I (and my mates) wanted to do good for him so that he was happy. An odd thing to do, on reflection.

However, despite the set back of having very clever people all around me, I enjoyed those school days more than at any other time of my life.

Hope that Edmund Campion was good to you. Was it?

 

 

[kalifire]

Being in the Southern Hemisphere this year has given me a new appreciation for this beauty.