kings of the campsite Badgers or Weasels....?

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

3 hours ago, vintagelaureate said:

Never mind this; as a group of friends we once debated at length who would win a fight between a squirrel and a rabbit. 

A few months later my friend actually witnessed one. He felt the rabbit came out on top as ultimately the squirrel made its getaway. 

 

Squirrels are hard as fuck, when push comes to shove. Our old cat was, at one point, queen of the manor. Then she got in to a fight with a squirrel, and she was mauled, man. And I mean mauled. I know for a fact that squirrels do not follow the Queensberry rules. That's the grey squirrels, you understand. The red squirrel, I find, is eloquent, and full of charm. Definitely not a fighter. More of a coward -  much like myself.

[Mighty Roiston]

Hello campers and stampers. Jeff the campsite Badger here. Thanks to all who have taken an interest. As I start to arrange next years Wormery for site I reflect on various comments. We are indeed the mighty British Badger. We sorted the pesky Baboons at Glasto 1999 when Big Trev Badger spiked the bananas and jelly. Since then my role as Badger Glasto Site Boss has grown. Pesky weasels are my main festival concern. The 50th anniversary will see a major effort from 'Well-Ard' Weasel and his cronies. 

 

As time marches on and my stripes grow grey, I embolden myself and fellow 'Stripeys' by conjuring weirdness and such like. The Pyramid SET will rule supreme. All attempts by 'pesky Weasels' to cause festival jiggery pokery will fail. 

 

Let the Two camps stand now. Are you 'BADGER'..cool, stripey, sharp teeth, cider bus 9 pints no bother...

 

or are you...'PESKY WEASEL'. Creepy snouty, squeaky, little buggers....running around squaking under tents and bloody being PESKY!. Grrr!

 

6 hours ago, shuttlep said:

what type of badger?

 

 

your common UK badger or the much feared Honey Badger ? 

 

also is it a fight to the death?

is it one badger on one weasel (hardly fair given the size of your common weasel ), maybe it should be 1 badger v 15 weasels .

 

until I know the answers to my questions I cannot vote either way, I need to be fully informed 

Hello campers and stampers. Jeff the campsite Badger here. Thanks to all who have taken an interest. As I start to arrange next years Wormery for site I reflect on various comments. We are indeed the mighty British Badger. We sorted the pesky Baboons at Glasto 1999 when Big Trev Badger spiked the bananas and jelly. Since then my role as Badger Glasto Site Boss has grown. Pesky weasels are my main festival concern. The 50th anniversary will see a major effort from 'Well-Ard' Weasel and his cronies. 

 

As time marches on and my stripes grow grey, I embolden myself and fellow 'Stripeys' by conjuring weirdness and such like. The Pyramid SET will rule supreme. All attempts by 'pesky Weasels' to cause festival jiggery pokery will fail. 

 

Let the Two camps stand now. Are you 'BADGER'..cool, stripey, sharp teeth, cider bus 9 pints no bother...

 

or are you...'PESKY WEASEL'. Creepy snouty, squeaky, little buggers....running around squaking under tents and bloody being PESKY!. Grrr!

 

 

 

[Mark E. Spliff]

1 hour ago, Mighty Roiston said:

Hello campers and stampers. Jeff the campsite Badger here. Thanks to all who have taken an interest. As I start to arrange next years Wormery for site I reflect on various comments. We are indeed the mighty British Badger. We sorted the pesky Baboons at Glasto 1999 when Big Trev Badger spiked the bananas and jelly. Since then my role as Badger Glasto Site Boss has grown. Pesky weasels are my main festival concern. The 50th anniversary will see a major effort from 'Well-Ard' Weasel and his cronies. 

 

As time marches on and my stripes grow grey, I embolden myself and fellow 'Stripeys' by conjuring weirdness and such like. The Pyramid SET will rule supreme. All attempts by 'pesky Weasels' to cause festival jiggery pokery will fail. 

 

Let the Two camps stand now. Are you 'BADGER'..cool, stripey, sharp teeth, cider bus 9 pints no bother...

 

or are you...'PESKY WEASEL'. Creepy snouty, squeaky, little buggers....running around squaking under tents and bloody being PESKY!. Grrr!

 

Hello campers and stampers. Jeff the campsite Badger here. Thanks to all who have taken an interest. As I start to arrange next years Wormery for site I reflect on various comments. We are indeed the mighty British Badger. We sorted the pesky Baboons at Glasto 1999 when Big Trev Badger spiked the bananas and jelly. Since then my role as Badger Glasto Site Boss has grown. Pesky weasels are my main festival concern. The 50th anniversary will see a major effort from 'Well-Ard' Weasel and his cronies. 

 

As time marches on and my stripes grow grey, I embolden myself and fellow 'Stripeys' by conjuring weirdness and such like. The Pyramid SET will rule supreme. All attempts by 'pesky Weasels' to cause festival jiggery pokery will fail. 

 

Let the Two camps stand now. Are you 'BADGER'..cool, stripey, sharp teeth, cider bus 9 pints no bother...

 

or are you...'PESKY WEASEL'. Creepy snouty, squeaky, little buggers....running around squaking under tents and bloody being PESKY!. Grrr!

 

 

 

You can say that again.

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

Ladies and gentlemen (Oh, how binary can I get!). I present yo you;

 

Bertie 'The Bastard' Badger

 

He's a hit man. Well, no that's not quite right. He's a hit badger. Mess with him, and you fucked. Ennit?

 

 

[Ayrshire Chris]

I saw a lovely wee mouse peeking his head out of a hole in the stone circle sacred space. 

[Superscally]

8 hours ago, Mighty Roiston said:

Hello from 'JEFF' Chief Campsite Supervisor of all things Badger. On arrival at site we will be occupying our year 2000 camping zone. The Badger Zone Crew will erect the marquees and dig the burrows as usual. Opposite the Pyramid Stage next to Lock up. B&W tape will be in evidence. NOTE: Orange is Banned as Pesky Weasel shades are SILLY.

Sorry Jeff. We're Camp Badger. Have been every year since 2007. More than happy to have you join us, but you will defer to higher command, over. 

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

15 minutes ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

I saw a lovely wee mouse peeking his head out of a hole in the stone circle sacred space. 

Of course you did! lol

[guypjfreak]

It's all hedgehogs to me old sons 

[Ayrshire Chris]

38 minutes ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

Of course you did! lol

Ha ha !

It was morning and I can assure you no substances had been taken for at least for eight hours prior to the appearance of the mouse. Unless you count the can of fosters and pot noodle breakfast. 

[marathonsteve]

5 hours ago, CaledonianGonzo said:

So much for the tolerant left!

What about the Monster Raving Looney Party which I have consistedly voted for

[Quark]

12 hours ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

I saw a lovely wee mouse peeking his head out of a hole in the stone circle sacred space. 

I saw a little mouse with clogs on

[shuttlep]

I saw a hare sprinting around, are they involved

 

also saw a mole one year popped up right in-front of me at the stone circle (edit , this may or may not have happened in reality)

[Charm]

Love this thread and you @Mighty Roiston you absolute mentalist, and of course I’m supporting the badgers.  

Charm x

[clarkete]

[mashedonmud]

I've read with interest but I'm failing to pick a side. You can't resist the cheeky little character of the weasel. You get eye contact with them and instantly see the glint in their eye. Admittedly their mates are killing everything in your garden whilst you're lost in this moment.

But badgers have faults too. Twisted ankle whilst strolling through woods once. You may think I should of noticed the entrance to the sett. But what if it was a trap deliberately put in place to catch me unawares. I can not say for sure.

To summarise I'm gonna stay sitting on the fence a while longer and let the debate continue. A floating voter for the moment.

Footnote. 

If you want to give badgers an advantage teach them the highway code, fucking carnage out here. ?

[Ayrshire Chris]

4 hours ago, Quark said:

I saw a little mouse with clogs on

Max Bygraves, should have played the legend slot! 

[hfuhruhurr]

been wearing my "bring it" badger t for ages, one year a local said "you like badgers do you?"
Not wanting to be confrontational, I said "what's happened?"
him: Badger killed my dog
me: crikey, that's awful, how did that happen?
him: we sent it down to flush the badger out and that was that - 'kin 'orrible badgers

me secretly: poor dog, and wattaw*nka
me to him: that's awful, that's why I never use them to wipe my arse

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

2 hours ago, mashedonmud said:

 

If you want to give badgers an advantage teach them the highway code, fucking carnage out here. ?

It's the same thing where I live. The roads are completely strewn with their dead bodies.

 

[mashedonmud]

1 hour ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

It's the same thing where I live. The roads are completely strewn with their dead bodies.

 

You sir get an upvote just for Withnail & I. And may I suggest you treat yourself to a glass of the finest wine known to humanity, and a Camberwell Carrot. ?

No murdering of chickens though. (Even if they try to befriend you ?). Been enough threats of animal violence and certainly more than enough deaths already?

[Yoghurt on a Stick]

2 hours ago, mashedonmud said:

You sir get an upvote just for Withnail & I. And may I suggest you treat yourself to a glass of the finest wine known to humanity, and a Camberwell Carrot. ?

No murdering of chickens though. (Even if they try to befriend you ?). Been enough threats of animal violence and certainly more than enough deaths already?

I've indulged with more Camberwell Carrots tonight than makes any sense. My neighbour just kept producing them all evening from about 4pm until about 7pm. Then we went to the pub for a couple of real ales. When these landed on top of what I'd already drunk, then you get where I'm at, right now. Would love to be able to communicate properly, but can't. Thank goodness for Tony Blackburn on Radio 2. I shit you not!

[mashedonmud]

56 minutes ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

I've indulged with more Camberwell Carrots tonight than makes any sense. My neighbour just kept producing them all evening from about 4pm until about 7pm. Then we went to the pub for a couple of real ales. When these landed on top of what I'd already drunk, then you get where I'm at, right now. Would love to be able to communicate properly, but can't. Thank goodness for Tony Blackburn on Radio 2. I shit you not!

Leffe. Enough said. ?

[Ayrshire Chris]

10 hours ago, shuttlep said:

I saw a hare sprinting around, are they involved

 

also saw a mole one year popped up right in-front of me at the stone circle (edit , this may or may not have happened in reality)

That mole was my mouse in disguise. 

[Mighty Roiston]

Hail and Happy Sniffly Snout Day. Today is National Badger Sniffly Snout Day. This celebration each year, is held to hone our snouts and scream and shout. Pesky Silly Smelly Pimply ...weasels also have a so called 'DAY' today....(I should coco...)....Its called 'Wang yer Wallop'...

 

Anyway...enjoy the Biryani grubs/ sun dried caterpillars and Southern fried ( in a Kentucky Box)..( Not polystyrene/no Toys)...Worms.

 

2020 will see the first Erection. Our 5G mast is going up...near the bloke who sells balloons in greenfields. Message ends....Beware the pesky Weasely Weasels. 

 

Addendum..: How come there is 'NO' Weasel Leader. ( Still sneaking under local chemist )?????rrrr!

[mashedonmud]

1 hour ago, Mighty Roiston said:

Addendum..: How come there is 'NO' Weasel Leader. ( Still sneaking under local chemist )?????rrrr!

If you're looking for a leader of the opposition who'll be completely useless and impotent in all they do. Thus strengthening your own position. May i suggest Jeremy.  Going by latest poll he could soon be available. Just a thought. ?

That's presuming they'll have him as I'm sure weasels have some standards. ?

Edited September 21, 2019 by mashedonmud

[CaledonianGonzo]

I thought Noel Fielding was presenting the baking show now.