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Thread for the drunkards

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3 minutes ago, mashedonmud said:

Just wondering what "signs" to look for when contemplating if maybe, a tiny teeny wee bit, I may of over indulged this festive period.  More rum consumed than I dare think about. Many more consumables added into the mix. Feeling flakey doesn't half describe my present unwellbeing. But the "signs" are showing me it's time to ease up. I had to go to work early this morning, my colleague picked me up and started the fourty minute drive far to chirpy. I soon had him silenced with my utter misery, and it stayed silent until I screamed

"fuck, mind out, there's cow's on the road"

He didn't slow down, he didn't panic, just gave a pitiful look and said

"They're chevrons, indicating a bend in the road. They've always been there "

"Oooops" was my feeble reply.

Those signs are my sign to maybe reign it in.....

But it's New Years eve, so one final push😉

The only signs you need to be looking out for are those of the speed limit by the sound of things :) 

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3 hours ago, mashedonmud said:

Just wondering what "signs" to look for when contemplating if maybe, a tiny teeny wee bit, I may of over indulged this festive period.  More rum consumed than I dare think about. Many more consumables added into the mix. Feeling flakey doesn't half describe my present unwellbeing. But the "signs" are showing me it's time to ease up. I had to go to work early this morning, my colleague picked me up and started the fourty minute drive far to chirpy. I soon had him silenced with my utter misery, and it stayed silent until I screamed

"fuck, mind out, there's cow's on the road"

He didn't slow down, he didn't panic, just gave a pitiful look and said

"They're chevrons, indicating a bend in the road. They've always been there "

"Oooops" was my feeble reply.

Those signs are my sign to maybe reign it in.....

But it's New Years eve, so one final push😉

That's a fantastic late entry for this years Drunkard of the Year Award. That'll take some beating, and there's only a few hours left. Very well pitched.

Just in case you were in any doubt though. These are road chevrons;

Related image

 

And these are cows;

Image result for cows

 

As an aside I never actually knew that chevrons were to indicate a bend in the road. All I knew was that you were to keep two chevrons apart. Apparently they kick off if in close proximity to each other!

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41 minutes ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

That's a fantastic late entry for this years Drunkard of the Year Award. That'll take some beating, and there's only a few hours left. Very well pitched.

Just in case you were in any doubt though. These are road chevrons;

Related image

 

And these are cows;

Image result for cows

 

As an aside I never actually knew that chevrons were to indicate a bend in the road. All I knew was that you were to keep two chevrons apart. Apparently they kick off if in close proximity to each other!

My chevron looked like this, but more than one. So a bit more herdy in appearance. 😁

I've opened a Peroni,  seems safer. 🤔

I'm shocked that you might of thought that I'd mistake some lines on the road for a herd of cows. If he'd been driving over lines I'm pretty certain I would of made him stop.😂

Is drunkard of the year a thing? Are you undefeated?

Screenshot_20191231-155915_Google.jpg

Edited by mashedonmud

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The more I look at that picture  the more Freudian ( I actually typed fresian but predictive text is insisting it's Freudian, so Freudian it is) it looks. A two legged udderless cow. I'm not as bothered about my easy mistake as I was. Especially my uneccessary  panic about leaving this mortal earth  covered in beef, pooh and unpasteurized milk. That picture vindicates my reaction. It was also a bit cloudy, so not quite perfect visibility. 😀

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45 minutes ago, mashedonmud said:

The more I look at that picture  the more Freudian ( I actually typed fresian but predictive text is insisting it's Freudian, so Freudian it is) it looks. A two legged udderless cow. I'm not as bothered about my easy mistake as I was. Especially my uneccessary  panic about leaving this mortal earth  covered in beef, pooh and unpasteurized milk. That picture vindicates my reaction. It was also a bit cloudy, so not quite perfect visibility. 😀

Yeah, I thought they were bulls too, but it distinctly said that they were cows, and I rushed ahead and posted it. That'll teach me to be too hasty.

I'm not really sure if Drunkard of the Year is a thing, as I made it up in my own head. I do drink, quite a bit even, but am nowhere near the drunkard that I used to be. Those days would see me waking up in police cells wondering how the fuck I'd managed to find myself in there again. It was a terrible time, and one that I have no desire to re-visit. That said, me and my wife are being taken out tonight with all our drinks being bought for us. That could spell mental disaster for us, and financial ruin for the bloke who is paying.

Wishing you a fab evening. :)

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17 minutes ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

Yeah, I thought they were bulls too, but it distinctly said that they were cows, and I rushed ahead and posted it. That'll teach me to be too hasty.

I'm not really sure if Drunkard of the Year is a thing, as I made it up in my own head. I do drink, quite a bit even, but am nowhere near the drunkard that I used to be. Those days would see me waking up in police cells wondering how the fuck I'd managed to find myself in there again. It was a terrible time, and one that I have no desire to re-visit. That said, me and my wife are being taken out tonight with all our drinks being bought for us. That could spell mental disaster for us, and financial ruin for the bloke who is paying.

Wishing you a fab evening. :)

Two Peroni thus far. Several invites from friends and neighbours for various local party's. Not sure I'm feeling it so could well be asleep by 9pm. But who knows where the third bottle leads.  Whilst I return the fab evening wishes back at ya may I also wish you a fantastic New Year,  actually fuck that short sighted approach.  Have yourself a fantastic life for many years to come. Nope, scrub that. For all of time. 🤗

Edited by mashedonmud

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1 hour ago, mashedonmud said:

 Whilst I return the fab evening wishes back at ya may I also wish you a fantastic New Year,  actually fuck that short sighted approach.  Have yourself a fantastic life for many years to come. Nope, scrub that. For all of time. 🤗

Right back at ya mashedonmud. :)

 

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Pacing myself, it’s Moretti then tea, then Moretti then tea, alternating all evening. This regular fluid intake and the diuretic effect of the tea will mean frequent visits to the smallest room keeping me active and relatively sober. 

Bond film on , Christ, didn’t  know Sam smith sang the spectre theme song . Pass me another

0422DFA4-A0E8-49C6-9887-6928A503589E.gif.c54b017d3fde6b6d97ad3baa8a74c614.gif

Edited by Ayrshire Chris

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Craig David appeared for longer than i anticipated, i dropped the remote. It was a bad moment☹.

Thankfully bbc2 was soon restored. 😁

I was gonna behave but feeling a session coming on. 🤪

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Two pints of Magners and an Aspall tonight. Declined the offer of wine. Quite a win for me, that. Going to try to massively curb it this year. 

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1 hour ago, kalifire said:

 Going to try to massively curb it this year. 

Same here, if truth be known. I've had decades of canning it, and finally (at last) am beginning to tire of it. I don't suppose I'll ever give up. because the 'naughty' gene in me is too strong. However, I would like to take my foot off the accelerator pedal, and try to confine it to weekends at the very least. 

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Lazy New Years Eve round my mum's playing board games with family. Rewatched Lizzo's set from Glastonbury to scrub the 5 minutes of Craig David that I saw from memory. Now the highlights show are on and I've cracked open a lovely chocolate marshmallow stout.

Happy New Year one and all! 

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Fuck me watching Janet 'performing' Rhythm Nation. Not only is she barely dancing and not singing, the unnecessary mic makes her look like Hitler.

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Steamin... 

HNY yorm bastards xxxzs

Why not, tis what its for. Lovely.

Edited by yehbutnobut
Been waiting for the right moment to post in here

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14 hours ago, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

These are road chevrons;

Related image

 

 

I took six hours driving home from Chichester. Those Chevrons are there in the longest stretch without an exit, 
I know what they are up to...

Bunch of C***s

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Happy New Year Drunkards! Went camping for the night with my family by the beach. Many a bottle of scrumpy was drunk. Gotta love a new years in the Summer sun :)

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3 hours ago, bamber said:

I took six hours driving home from Chichester. Those Chevrons are there in the longest stretch without an exit, 
I know what they are up to...

Bunch of C***s

I was properly entertained during the drive by Matt Lucas's 3 hour TV theme tune show, much, much better than it sounds. 

 

White Horses was my personal favourite.

 

Edited by bamber

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On 12/24/2019 at 10:08 AM, Yoghurt on a Stick said:

Hello Sasperella,

Happy to hear that things aren't too bad for you after last night. Hang on in there.

Yes, the feastivities truly started last night, and the foot was firmly put down on the accelerator. I managed to get to bed at about 6am this morning, but was up for 8.30am. That's possibly to do with having taken a shed full of speed. I am, rather spookily, feeling as fresh as a daisy. Also, while we're on this thread, I am actually just finishing off a G & T that was left over from last night. Waste not, want not, and all that.

Wishing you a speedy journey through the working day, and a very Happy Christmas. :)

Oh, forgot to say - I've got some heavy hitting guests arriving at around 1pm today, so may well be adding to this thread sonner rather than later. Yikes!

 

Happy New Year YOAS

 

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@Yoghurt on a Stick and @Ayrshire Chris - I hope you guys had a nice NYE. Arran was even more beautiful than I expected :) The weather on New Years Eve morning was absolutely magical and we saw so many seals!. We had a fairly debauched night on Sunday evening, which meant I was in a bit of a hungover grump on Monday morning, but everything was so beautiful it was hard to stay like that for long!

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10 hours ago, Bryanrebe said:

Happy New Year Drunkards! Went camping for the night with my family by the beach. Many a bottle of scrumpy was drunk. Gotta love a new years in the Summer sun :)

And happy new year to you. Looks like a lot of Kiwis are camping. Just got a text from my daughter and family, they’ve decided to stay on their campsite until the weekend. Some place called Waipu Cove. Seems the weather is pretty decent!  Bring some over with you next summer!  

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18 minutes ago, Sasperella said:

@Yoghurt on a Stick and @Ayrshire Chris - I hope you guys had a nice NYE. Arran was even more beautiful than I expected :) The weather on New Years Eve morning was absolutely magical and we saw so many seals!. We had a fairly debauched night on Sunday evening, which meant I was in a bit of a hungover grump on Monday morning, but everything was so beautiful it was hard to stay like that for long!

About sums up Arran, had a workmate who used to play the accordion in the hotels during the holiday seasons. Used to come back to work after Xmas and new year  a gibbering wreck with all the drink he had consumed, and he hadn’t paid for a single drink. 

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1 hour ago, Sasperella said:

@Yoghurt on a Stick and @Ayrshire Chris - I hope you guys had a nice NYE. Arran was even more beautiful than I expected :) The weather on New Years Eve morning was absolutely magical and we saw so many seals!. We had a fairly debauched night on Sunday evening, which meant I was in a bit of a hungover grump on Monday morning, but everything was so beautiful it was hard to stay like that for long!

Hello Sasperella,

Happy to hear that Arran was all what you expected. It's definitely a place on my hit list, as is all three of the Aran Islands off Galway, in Ireland. I want to Aran / Arran myself, until I can take no more. :)

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19 hours ago, bamber said:

I took six hours driving home from Chichester. Those Chevrons are there in the longest stretch without an exit, 
I know what they are up to...

Bunch of C***s

What were you doing in Chi??? Never seen a chevron here except on the black & white ones on the twisities.

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