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Best man speech


FuzzyDunlop
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8 minutes ago, FuzzyDunlop said:

I have to do a speech in 13 days time for my best mate who I known for years. Im really struggling to come up with anything decent.

The same recycled jokes are not funny. Looking online and I am really struggling.

Anyone got any tips?

Yeah use original material, don't read it word for word from a page, and practice practice practice it out loud. 

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Whatever you do don't use this gag, mate of mine genuinely heard this in a best mans speech and it soured the mood somewhat;

 

"I'd just like to mention how wonderful the Bridesmaids look today, in fact, when they arrived I reminded me of that famous TV show Sex and the City. Well, if the city was Hull, and the sex was anal"

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Don't look online!

Get a laugh in early, even if its a fairly bog standard joke. Settle everyone. Tell a few funny stories about him - doesn't have to be relevant to anything, just funny - and don't bring up any ex girlfriends. Have a page in front of you with bullet points. Reference it as much as you like. If you get stuck, stop, and have a sip of your drink. Gives you time to think. 

You'll really enjoy it after a minute or two.

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3 minutes ago, the_hedge said:

One piece of advice - Get on with your Mother In law. I didn't speak to mine for years, not because we didn't get on, I just thought it was rude to interrupt 

Not bad, but only works if the best man is married

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i was a best man once, I hated it. but everyone else seems to like it.

 

i just told stories about his ineptitude to meet woman when he was younger. and just general funny stories about him, finish off with how well he has done now

 

job done

 

 

and don;t get too pissed before the speach

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You could end your speech with 'May the hinges of love and friendship never sieze up for the want of a drop of lubrication'. Then raise your glass and say ' Your good health' whilst looking at the bride and groom. Then down your drink in a one'er. Hopefully everybody else will follow suit which will be great alcoholic grounding for dancing to Come on Eileen later in the night. It will also help with the thought of eating cold black pudding at the buffet later on in the evening.

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