Glastonbury festival

[Scouse Andy]

could be worse... you could be a scouser

[IamChappu]

In one's humble opinion, this thread is absolutely hilarious. Just the thing to read whilst sipping a Pimms - it has certainly brightened up one's dull afternoon!

[frankie boy]

Wow your rhymes are tight blud like realy real and that your my working class hero.

Of corse my middle class hero would be plan b or summink get me

[frankie boy]

In one's humble opinion, this thread is absolutely hilarious. Just the thing to read whilst sipping a Pimms - it has certainly brightened up one's dull afternoon!

[robith]

Chris, I love your rhymes they're dope

I extend my hand across the Thames and offer a pint at Glastonbury for an accapella performance

[Balumba]

I still can't believe this isn't being taken seriously by some. The following just about sums up where we are at the minute:

This thread is serious and raises a point

Pisshead's delirious and blazes a joint

Geri was ginger and posh one was glam

Drinks like a binger and noshed off B's clam

Pugwall sung like a fool, guitar was his main tool

We rule, the young drool, to generalise a drugs mule

Opens her legs like a pond full of salmon

Sir with your fried eggs would you like some gammon?

And no, this ISN'T a joke.

[Catford_Chris]

A quick one for the romantics. Seriously though, please lay off any piss taking with this one, I went through enough when we split!

Awareness is spacial, but let's not get racial

The tarts name was Rachel, enjoyed a good facial

Floorboards varnished with the long red planks

Rachel was tarnished, she could've said thanks

The lamb was garnished, a beautiful shank

The loan was harnessed, Natwest what a bank

Rachel got slack, and let herself go

Ain't taking her back, look after yaself ho!

And now I've got Leanne, no danger of a litter

Cos Leanne ain't go no qualms, on taking it up the shitter

[robith]

Awareness is spacial, but let's not get racial

The tarts name was Rachel, enjoyed a good facial

[Catford_Chris]

I can't believe some dare to dis

The legend that is Catford_Chris

Take note of the work displayed above

Tell me, what about it's not to love

Just check the refrence to the classic Pugwall

His knowledge of this era stands up tall

His style can come across occasionaly manic

Just like that of the Orange Organic

That doesnn't make him a "twat" or "twit"

To the working classes, he's a big hit

[Catford_Chris]

I am getting that tatooed on myself

[LondonTom]

A quick one for the romantics. Seriously though, please lay off any piss taking with this one, I went through enough when we split!

Awareness is spacial, but let's not get racial

The tarts name was Rachel, enjoyed a good facial

Floorboards varnished with the long red planks

Rachel was tarnished, she could've said thanks

The lamb was garnished, a beautiful shank

The loan was harnessed, Natwest what a bank

Rachel got slack, and let herself go

Ain't taking her back, look after yaself ho!

And now I've got Leanne, no danger of a litter

Cos Leanne ain't go no qualms, on taking it up the shitter

[Tiddles]

Is Glastonbury only suitable for middle class heads?

Edited April 21, 2010 by Tiddles

[18Alex18]

that must be it...

[devonhammer]

Yes, seen it. But someone asking Bob for a P please on Blockbusters didn't improve that show much either.

[devonhammer]

This young lady has got it right:

"But I don't work"

[bigsmoke]

on a positive note, this thread has reminded me to look out 'original pirate material' on spotify.

cracking album, i'm having a right little time

[tommmy]

Dear Chris,

I heard about Rachel but don't be bitter,

Even though Leanne takes it up the shitter.

Dandelion, daisy, monkey puzzle tree,

Chris with your words, you have turned me.

Heathrow, Gatwick, aeroplane,

Chrissy I luv ya, hope you feel the same.

Bus stop, taxi rank, railway station,

Before we meet up you need an evacuation.

Marie Claire, TV Quick, The Big Issue,

It's gonna get messy, better bring a tissue.

Bob's Full House, Opportunity Knocks,

Chris I wanna do ya, up the dirt box.

Lots of love

Tommmy xxx

Edited April 22, 2010 by tommmy

[Langdale Wolf]

Dear Chris,

I heard about Rachel but don't be bitter,

Even though Leanne takes it up the shitter.

Dandelion, daisey, monkey puzzle tree,

Chris with your words, you have turned me.

Heathrow, Gatwick, aeroplane,

Chrissy I luv ya, hope you feel the same.

Bus stop, taxi rank, railway station,

Before we meet up you need an evacuation.

Marie Claire, TV Quick, The Big Issue,

It's gonna get messy, better bring a tissue.

Bob's Full House, Golden Shot, Opportunity Knocks,

Chris I wanna do ya, up the dirt box.

Lots of love

Tommmy xxx

[John_Champ]

Alright Catford, here's a quick summary of you from the perspective of a working class lad (though one in higher education) from Leicester:

You've created, in your head, an impossibly select group of people. (Must be 'working class', though you never give your definition, must be from SE London). This way any time any one counters any argument you make, or slanders you as a person, you can justify it to yourself by saying 'you don't understand cause you're not one of me'. Except everyone does understand.

Re the class prejudice at Glasto, tbh I agree, there is a slight class prejudice, though to be honest, these days, class is harder to recognise on sight/sound than someone's geographical origins, so I'd say there's more of a north/south/regional prejudice anyway. Besides, Catford, you have already shown yourself to have a prejudice against the North:

As you go up North, you just get what we call the Underclass, which is the layer just below working class, and comprises of people from backwater villages like Gainsborough, Skelmersdale, Newcastle and Liverpool. Often these Northern underclasses do try to come to the civilised South for a better life, but generally end up living on the street as they can't handle seeing things like cars and shops.

So are you arguing to stop prejudice, or just to stop the prejudice you imagine you are suffering? Cause to be honest mate, you're not exactly from the most perscuted group in history are you?

Look at it like this, because of the way you go about things, everyone on here thinks you're a dick. Not because of who you are or where you're from, because of your personality. And before you start telling everyone about how many mates you've got that you go out driking with, think of the biggest c*nt you know, and then think of how many mates they've got.

Basically mate, stop being so defensive, you'll have more fun at Glasto if you're sharing joints and beers with the people around you than trying to think up excuses for the reasons they don't like you.

[tommmy]

Alright Catford, here's a quick summary of you from the perspective of a working class lad (though one in higher education) from Leicester:

You've created, in your head, an impossibly select group of people. (Must be 'working class', though you never give your definition, must be from SE London). This way any time any one counters any argument you make, or slanders you as a person, you can justify it to yourself by saying 'you don't understand cause you're not one of me'. Except everyone does understand.

Re the class prejudice at Glasto, tbh I agree, there is a slight class prejudice, though to be honest, these days, class is harder to recognise on sight/sound than someone's geographical origins, so I'd say there's more of a north/south/regional prejudice anyway. Besides, Catford, you have already shown yourself to have a prejudice against the North:

As you go up North, you just get what we call the Underclass, which is the layer just below working class, and comprises of people from backwater villages like Gainsborough, Skelmersdale, Newcastle and Liverpool. Often these Northern underclasses do try to come to the civilised South for a better life, but generally end up living on the street as they can't handle seeing things like cars and shops.

So are you arguing to stop prejudice, or just to stop the prejudice you imagine you are suffering? Cause to be honest mate, you're not exactly from the most perscuted group in history are you.

Look at it like this, because of the way you go about things, everyone on here thinks you're a dick. Not because of who you are or where you're from, because of your personality. And before you start telling everyone about how many mates you've got that you go out driking with, think of the biggest c*nt you know, and then think of how many mates they've got.

Basically mate, stop being so defensive, you'll have more fun at Glasto if you're sharing joints and beers with the people around you than trying to think up excuses for the reasons they don't like you.

[Catford_Chris]

Big love to Tommmmmmy and the man there LondonTom, props and erbs.

John Champ, man you got a lot to investigate. You're wrong, and I think you recognise this, but it's just how wrong you are that's proper bad.

To sum up:

Vorderman had numbers, and Whitely had vowells

Bordering the Humber, quite rightly loose bowels

Now it's Jeff Stelling, and a tart with tits large

But what are you selling, wanted Bart but not Marge

Switched to new channel, like Adrian Chiles

Pass me the flannel, bad case of the piles

Chiles was chuffed, he had a new job

Piles was rough, resembled the blob

Dominic Little was cocky and urban

Hardeep Singh-Kohli was dyeing his turban

And then young Christine, with her mental face

The bean soup was pristine, with its lentil base

Just read it, and take it in John Champ. Hopefully it'll open your eyes as to how important the class structure still is in this country.

[ampersand]

Just read it, and take it in John Champ. Hopefully it'll open your eyes as to how important the class structure still is in this country.

[mandypants]

I'm so working class, I really don't understand a word of your rhymes dude, I simply can't grasp your point at all!

[tommmy]

Hello

[mandypants]

Hello