ian the worm

Just remembered that rather incriminating video evidence was once circulating at my place of work (quite a posh place)…... and HR issued the legendary memo saying “employees should not film people masturbating in the toilets”. Totally missing the point as they seemed to be more concerned with GDPR.

Neil Parish has done an amazing U-Turn by resigning today. Yes he stumbled for a day and yesterdays interview was a car crash. But today he was honest and therefore seems really really open about it. Resigning was the best option by far Secondly he shows up everyone else who is not resigning and “waiting for the inquiry” regarding things they have done wrong. And I like that. Because I assume Boris will now say that Neil Parish has done the right thing.

I would….

Whenever you happen upon a man dressed as a lobster singing a Christmas song, SHOW HIM YOUR CLAWS!!!!!

I heard that the person that does the map colouring has just found an eighth shade of pale green to make the map even more fucking confusing.

Whoop wheeeeeeee and weyhay.

Still available. Friday attendee here 👋

Thanks to this thread I’m rather hooked on this…

Typical bar encounter at a gig last night. I grabbed some cash and went to the venue but when I got to the bar I saw the dreaded sign “cards only”. A drunk bloke waiting at the bar saw me about to ask the bar staff something and aggressively told me to wait my turn pal as he was first. I asked if the bar downstairs was also card only and barman said yes which meant I was unable to buy my own drink. So I explained to the drunk bloke that I couldn’t buy my own drink and asked him if he’d like to buy me a drink instead. I waved my wad of cash at him so he knew he’d not be out of pocket. He said no - not really but then agreed in the end as he understood my predicament and knew he’d get my money. So I went first and ordered my drink… a ginger beer! 😝 Drunk bloke hits the roof and says fucks sake man you’re not having one of them after all that - like I was insulting his newly offered friendship purely on his imagined contract of me asking for an alcoholic drink. Now, it’s actually none of his business what I drink, but nevertheless I had to decide how to play this one coz he wasn’t happy and the barman was waiting to see how this one went. So I leaned in to the drunk man and very careful explained that I’m in recovery, which I’m comfortable saying, but me and him were not getting on too well at this point so I had hesitant about it coz sometimes people don’t understand. He was a big man, fairly well tanked and already pretty pissed off with me for butting in and then requesting his help. Something clicked in him as he heard me say this and he instantly understood what I’d explained. He visibly softened and relaxed and asked me how long. Six years I said to which he replied he’d once done ten before lapsing. Done Fellowship and everything he proudly explained but had fallen back in it. He tried to give me my money back but I firmly reused it and gave him enough for his own drink too. As we parted he looked me in the eye shook my hand firmly and I know what he was thinking by his new body language and strong eye contact. It was “Fair play pal, I get you”. Over the past few years I’ve had quite a few drinkers quietly tell me they wish they could quit or cut down and in that brief contact of a handshake I felt him set himself an intention to review his own drinking. Telling this story here as I’m sure other non-drinkers will also have been “tutted at” for having a soft drink in a round. It never fucking gets easier does it unless you are with understanding mates. And to those of you wanting to review your own drinking, my advice is to listen to your heart and do whatever you feel is right for you, whenever that will be. 💚💛💙

Still a great gig.

I’m a possible. Got tickets to Stereo MCs so could be a before or after pop in.

Keston Cobblers Club new album Alchemist out today. Not at Glastonbury this year as far as I can tell.

What?

Oh I love The Doors. 😝 (I got FB blocked from my local venue for using this joke each gig).

Van MOT day for me. (I recently found out that you don’t get a government reminder). Oopsie. 🚐😶

FYI Lost Horizon in Bristol is a music venue. Lost Horizon at Glasto is the Sauna garden. The money buys you sauna, showers, sunbathing, sunshine etc. Not affiliated, just the same name.

I’ve had him nailed on for ages. Since Pienaar left really. I really like his basic explanation style.

Did I? That was good of me.

For those that like to watch me solder, here is a video of me brazing. I like to mix things up. (Also I’m super proud of this). 💚

Wait for Sue Grey. ✅ Wait for the police report. ✅ Just write the 1922 letters now please

Good video of how tight they are. Contains all good songs IMHO and I like how they’ve occasionally added a layer of keys when live.

Does the Co-op sell muffins? Sizeable opportunity to bring some unbuttered muffins to the front row to answer the main questions of the day.

I went. 👌 Felt at home.

Yep. Lots of us do sober festivals. Quite a lot actually. This’ll be my fourth sober Glasto. Have fun!!!! 💙✅🌈🏆