Dilemma

[gibble]

I have a dilemma and want to see what the general consensus is on it…

I’ve been going to Glastonbury since 1998 and absolutely adore it…it is by far my favourite weekend of the year. However, I have missed the last 2 festivals due to the birth of my 2 children. Before the birth of child number 2 I spoke to my wife about going in 2010 and she said it was fine, especially as I planned to celebrate my 30th Birthday there and it coincides with the festivals 40th celebrations. Then my son was born. On the 26th June! (to really rub it in I had bought tickets last October which I had to return when I found out my wife was pregnant and then won tickets in a competition I should never have entered as I couldn’t go so had to give said tickets to friends.)

This obviously clashes with next years festival. My wife says it is still ok for me to go and I am loathe to miss another festival but obviously would feel bad about missing my sons first birthday…my wife can’t go to the festival anyway because she is a teacher and is happy to look after the kids with the help of grandparents.

Would it be bad of me to go and celebrate my sons birthday on a different day? (I know from my daughters 1st birthday that he won’t really understand what’s going on!)

This is all hypothetical of course as I’d need to try and get a ticket first but any thoughts (preferably supportive!) would be appreciated! Should I try for tickets?

Ta…

Edited September 22, 2009 by gibble

[GlastoEls]

Your son is one year old - it's going to be a party for the adults!

My advice - plan something for *you and your wife* - a trip, a dinner, an experience.

Go to Glastonbury definitely!

[GlastoEls]

Hang on - 19th June is the week before Glasto!?!

[gibble]

Hang on - 19th June is the week before Glasto!?!

[random_man]

put your kids on ebay and go to glastonbury?

[rischbrit]

take kids with you? plenty of people do take young babies, toddlers etc

[Josie's Cat]

Oh my God, parental guilt, it's the worst kind. No-one tells you how much of it you will lug around for the rest of your life once you are over the initial honeymoon period. (ie the first five minutes of seeing the lines on the pregnancy test)

You are right, your son will have no idea that it's his first birthday, so don't let that stop you. Yes you will feel a twinge of "Aah it's his first birthday and I'm not there" - but think - are you there all the rest of the time?

Are you supportive, loving and a good dad? Of course you are, or you wouldn't be stressing about this!

Your wife obviously understands how important this is, and she is fine about it - so go!

Yes, definitely plan a weekend away or something special for you and your lovely and understanding wife, but don't let the guilts stop you enjoying the festival!

[Langdale Wolf]

If your wife understands and doesn't mind you going, then I don't see the problem.

I'm going sans wife and baby next year - like you, it's my 30th next year - and the wife has ok'd it for a special treat (bless her). It'll be the first time I'll have been away from my son, and I'm sure I'll miss him, but it's probably a one-off.

If everything/everyone else is cool, and it's just your conscience you need to convince, then you don't need any posts on here to help you with that.

[Langdale Wolf]

Oh my God, parental guilt, it's the worst kind. No-one tells you how much of it you will lug around for the rest of your life once you are over the initial honeymoon period. (ie the first five minutes of seeing the lines on the pregnancy test)

You are right, your son will have no idea that it's his first birthday, so don't let that stop you. Yes you will feel a twinge of "Aah it's his first birthday and I'm not there" - but think - are you there all the rest of the time?

Are you supportive, loving and a good dad? Of course you are, or you wouldn't be stressing about this!

Your wife obviously understands how important this is, and she is fine about it - so go!

Yes, definitely plan a weekend away or something special for you and your lovely and understanding wife, but don't let the guilts stop you enjoying the festival!

[Josie's Cat]

Thanks!

[gibble]

Great advice people...thanks very much!

The weekend will definitely be worth the twinge of guilt I feel on the Saturday and I think that as long as I make it up to my wife and son another time my conscience can be clear...

I just hope I get a ticket now!

[Jackmypie]

Why don you give the kids to their grandparents? Auntie? Uncle?

My birthday is on the 25th of June, and its always on glastonbury

[markeee]

deff go, as said, your son wont remember/understand what's going on, plenty more birthdays to spend with him

[sime]

Go but... On Saturday 26th, (having planned it with your wife) and if it's practicable travel wise, leave the site and pop back home to surprise your son on his birthday. Do something fun and then later on return to the festival. That's what I'd do anyways!

[Niblet]

I nearly had this dilema, My daughters birthday was scheduled for the 18th of June 2007, I resigned myself to being Glastonbury free until she was about 7 and then I'd take her with me, however she held on till July the 1st so I only had to miss 2007..

My wife would not be chuffed if I spent my daughters birthday at a festival, even Glastonbury (and she has been 3 times) so I was lucky.

If your wife is fine with it go for it, the nipper isn't going to remember, it's not like you are upsetting him by not being there, you can celebrate having the ankle biter any day of the year and definitely do something nice for your wife for her being nice and understanding

Edited September 24, 2009 by Niblet

[amfy]

I've thought about this and it's clear that your son won't remember, and your wife has said it's OK for you to go - so what's the problem?

It can only be that YOU don't think you should go. I think you need to think about why this is - because if you really don't think you should go, you aren't going to enjoy it as much as you want to anyway.