Virtual campfire 2009

[darrenbha]

Thats my normal dance karl

[karlpowell]

Thats my normal dance karl

[darrenbha]

Not long. Really can't wait this year. Just looking forward to more line up info now

[bertieb73]

whoop whoop whoop!

i'm so excited you can have 3.

[scaryclaireyfairy]

if you're about to break into 'wild wild west' i may have to shove your head into karl's tent...

[karlpowell]

if you're about to break into 'wild wild west' i may have to shove your head into karl's tent...

[scaryclaireyfairy]

see now i've got will smith's back-catalogue swimming round my head.

[darrenbha]

Can't think of many things worse than that. If you can drag them out they've just opened a songs of will smith graveyard over in trash city

[scaryclaireyfairy]

*sprints towards trash city*

i have to rid my mind of this disease!

[karlpowell]

Run .....Run like the wind , the Men in black are chasing you .

[scaryclaireyfairy]

AAAAARRRRGH!

[darrenbha]

Oh at least its not summer summer summer time

[scaryclaireyfairy]

*returns to camp, all out of breath and cleansed*

summer, summer....? oh, you b*stard!

*sprints back to trash city to remove song*

[bertieb73]

Can't think of many things worse than that. If you can drag them out they've just opened a songs of will smith graveyard over in trash city

[karlpowell]

Just a few fart gasses in there +the odd smelly sock

[darrenbha]

Thats truly awful Karl, what've you been eating

[karlpowell]

there is still a stale smell from the sprouts at christmas , how can 1 little Veg make so much wind ?

PS only 202 posts till glastonbury

Edited March 11, 2009 by karlpowell

[darrenbha]

202 then you're gonna give up karl, i reckon you'l manage way more, got any good jokes this mornning

[Mardy]

morning Darren.

Good joke? dunno about that, but this made me laugh

Stevie Wonder is playing his first gig in Tokyo and the place is absolutely

packed to the rafters. In a bid to break the ice with his new audience, He

asks if anyone would like him to play a request. A little old Japanese man

jumps out of his seat in the first row and shouts at the top of his voice

"Play a Jazz chord! Play a jazz chord!" Amazed that this guy knows about the

jazz influences in Stevie's varied career, the blind impresario starts to

play an E minor scale and then goes into a difficult jazz melody for about

10 minutes. When he finishes the whole place goes wild.

The little old man jumps up again and shouts "No, no, play a Jazz chord,

play a Jazz chord." A bit irritated by this, Stevie, being the professional

that he is, dives straight into a jazz improvisation with his band around

the B flat minor chord and really tears the place apart. The crowd goes wild

with this impromptu show of his technical expertise.

The little old man jumps up again. "No, no. Play a Jazz chord, play a jazz

chord!" Well now truly irritated that this little guy doesn't seem to

appreciate his playing ability. Stevie says to him from the stage "OK,

mister, you get up here and do it!" The little old man climbs up onto the

stage, takes hold of the mike and starts to sing... "A jazz chord to say I

ruv you...

[karlpowell]

Q. Where do pies go to get weighed?

A. Somewhere over the rainbow...

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weigh a pie.

[darrenbha]

[karlpowell]

The Gynaecologist Who Wanted to be a Mechanic!

A gynaecologist had become fed up with the cost of malpractice insurance, NHS paperwork and was burned out.

Hoping to try another career where skilful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic.

He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could.

When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynaecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill.

When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%.

Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying, "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade."

The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark.

"You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark."

After a pause, the instructor added, "I gave you an extra 50% because you did it all through the exhaust, which I've never seen done in my entire career

there are 104 days left till glastonbury , I always make 1000 post per year , I have 200 post left to make up this years 1000 , that 2 posts per day or there abouts .

since i have made 4 today already i am off back to bed ...see ya

Edited March 11, 2009 by karlpowell

[darrenbha]

The Gynaecologist Who Wanted to be a Mechanic!

A gynaecologist had become fed up with the cost of malpractice insurance, NHS paperwork and was burned out.

Hoping to try another career where skilful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic.

He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could.

When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynaecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill.

When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%.

Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying, "I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade."

The instructor said, "During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark.

"You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark."

After a pause, the instructor added, "I gave you an extra 50% because you did it all through the exhaust, which I've never seen done in my entire career

there are 104 days left till glastonbury , I always make 1000 post per year , I have 200 post left to make up this years 1000 , that 2 posts per day or there abouts .

since i have made 4 today already i am off back to bed ...see ya

[darrenbha]

<returns to camp humming beat it> what a nightmare ticketmaster was this morning. Good luck to any trying on friday. Roll on july 14th

[karlpowell]

<returns to camp humming beat it> what a nightmare ticketmaster was this morning. Good luck to any trying on friday. Roll on july 14th