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Virtual campfire 2009


Guest darrenbha

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The Day the Penis asked for a Raise

I, the Penis, hereby request a payrise for the following reasons:

* I do physical labor.

* I work at great depths.

* I plunge headfirst into everything I do.

* I do not get weekends or public holidays off.

* I work in a damp environment.

* I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation.

* I work in high temperatures.

* My work exposes me to contagious diseases.

Sincerely,

P. Niss

The Response

Dear Mr. Niss:

After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raised, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:

* You do not work 8 hours straight.

* You fall asleep after brief work periods.

* You do not always follow the orders of the management team.

* You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations.

* You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working.

* You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.

* You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing. ;

* You will retire well before you are 65.

* You are unable to work double shifts.

* You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed the assigned task.

* And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.

Sincerely,

V. Gina (Miss)

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Quality gag Karl and loving the message board. Very much reminds me of various ZX Spectrum games I had back in the day.

Think I've seen your trifle Darren, it's set over there shivering in the corner. Damn, that joke is so much funnier with Jelly....

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not so bad, cheers. it's sunny here, the snow has finally gone and I'm looking forward to coming home in a few weeks. Had an open University essay to do today, but it'[s done, so all's well with the world.

why did you have to cancel the ticket? (apologies if I missed something). I'll be honest, I pretty much prefer going to things on my own, but you know...

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