With reference to my somewhat prolific tomes

[gratedenini]

Well, as you`ve found out over the last couple of weeks... I do write a bit--so I thought i`d paste one of Me Email Corkers on here to give you an idea of what my correspondents regulary recieve..... see what you make of it. Some are LONG mind!---but not this one--just a likkle snippet to start... this is really old I think --probably 8 yrs or so...

<< well--a hankerin back to the old days...sat typing away with the old ear-goggles on--- a JD and coke next to me with Chris Rea playing.

How things--and life move on....how much in control are we?

I often think I have no control of my life at all (not in a bad way--in a good way)---whatever it brings I have dealt with.

One of the biggest changes my life has brought me of late is ...SHITTIN. ....and regular too. I`m sick of it even though I know its good for me.All these experiments Dr Silke is performimg on me are taking effect on me bowels more than anything.

GRUMPY OLD MEN..it seems popular atm to be a grumpy old man.I am one. OH YES.

Nowts the same--buses--they used to stop.Now they just blast past you even if your arm is out.Bastards.

Adverts for razors---with blokes wearing earrings.No adverts for Old Holborn anymore.We are advised to wash APPLES.

What happened to the buer who advertised Whisky--with a cleavage like Mt Snowdon?

Circus Clowns---they were shite even when I was a kid--and they are shite now.

Packaging---how many times have you tried to open a packet of prawns or something? Yer just cannot do it can yer? Welded together with samsonite.

PAUSE.......

Chris Rea..ANYONE QUITE LIKE YOU...(The Blue Cafe 1998)

"..........aint never seen anyone --quite like you.aint never been anyone quite like you!"

Remember in the very early days of Silke Birgitt(birdshit) listening to this.God this is strong stuff.

Right--I`m back --with a spurious refill of some sort of whisky i found in the cupboard (a leftover from our engagement party).

Goats are queer friggin things.The two here are characters....ones a twat--but he eats everything.

We are moving in a couple of weeks..so have bought another horse--so Millie will have company.This one is a mugs gallower..will do for everyone.

What a blessing to be able to look out of a window and see a horse or a chicken etc.

Have been crankin up the volume on me amp last few days---thank god I`m not in striking distance of people.As I look at me guitars..and touch em--feel the wood--the magicical quality--O LORDY MAMA--how I love guitars.

Bought a djemba the other week--an african drum.Sounds cool--its great just tappin away to records.

Grumpy Old Men time again... those bastard queue things in the post office and Marksies and Primark..where you wind like a bastard snake.round and round..till you get to the front..then you have to wait--and wait...... TILL 3 PLEASSE.

There was none of that when I was a kid..

"Two black russians,a pint of cider and a black aftershock please"

"£9.60...would you like any cashback?"

Its a bastard PUB..cashback? I was in a pub in Durham last week--lashed to the gills--went for a refill-- brown hatter next to me..." 2 coffees please!"

what the fcuk!!

tangent..ROBERT RANDOLPH..he`s the hendrix of the slide guitar.look for it.Hell its fantastic.On now.

The weather...its changing now of course (for those of my overseas correspondents--this wont matter)--- nights drawing in...oh that reminds me...

GRUMPY OLD MEN.... was in Woolies today... SELECTION BOXES for sale. Yeah... I nearly spewed.

Halloween Masks/ Fireworks/Selection Boxes/ 911 stickers...all there on sale.Bugger me..it will never end will it.

Talking of spew... I`m just about to. ...its not the drink either.... theres a bug about...

den>>

[shooting star]

Rich retired whatever

Maybe a rich or failed song writer

Shooting Star ( Girl)

[Harrow Strongbow Ciderman!]

'Shooting Star'> Welcome to the threads.

The Wychwood Six is now "The Wychwood Seven"

'gratedenini'> What are you rambling on about now you nutcase?!

Just get yerself along to this fest.

I'd much prefer to hear your tales of non-sensical over a beer at the fest than have to keep reading your esaays of woe!

What?..don't tell me you and missus might be jet-lagged after your return from Zante?!

[shooting star]

'Shooting Star'> Welcome to the threads.

The Wychwood Six is now "The Wychwood Seven"

'gratedenini'> What are you rambling on about now you nutcase?!

Just get yerself along to this fest.

I'd much prefer to hear your tales of non-sensical over a beer at the fest than have to keep reading your esaays of woe!

What?..don't tell me you and missus might be jet-lagged after your return from Zante?!

[timespeedsup]

Am I gonna survive going up to the very northern Derbyshire next weekend, to wear beards & talk shite over hippy music???

Wychwood will be a stroll in a very big and well-kept park in comparison.....

[Harrow Strongbow Ciderman!]

Ey--its alright for you posh Suithern bas-tards...

"Oh Par-tricia--why dont we have joodle-pips over to Zante for an hour?"

"But, Fienes I`ve got the children to collect from Icing Class at 4 and I`m getting the Jeeps tyres blackwashed this eve---will we have proper time for a Pimms?"

"Of course darling---get my cardigan---the one with the gingham knot I think--we`ll be there in a joe-nostril"

yer pack o bas-tards.

The likes of thou must be common as muck in Harrow--- "I say what harold? The gentleman wants a pint--and a pint of cider at that! Whatever shall we do?

"How very dare you!"

Remember --the flight to the Northern regions takes another 3 hours compared to you puffs down there.

Whatever did YOU do for Deidre Rashid when she was wrongly imprisoned? We stick by our own up here yer knaa.

The Apprentice and all that made-up bull-shit--- Indian!

den

[no smoke without fire]

'Shooting Star'> Welcome to the threads.

The Wychwood Six is now "The Wychwood Seven"

'gratedenini'> What are you rambling on about now you nutcase?!

Just get yerself along to this fest.

I'd much prefer to hear your tales of non-sensical over a beer at the fest than have to keep reading your esaays of woe!

What?..don't tell me you and missus might be jet-lagged after your return from Zante?!