Rufus Gwertigan

This guy really is a loser. Is Dad is a great guy though....

I am so going to piss myself laughing if you forget to pack something. Don't forget the kids. At a push one can last you for a whole week.

I have known this person for no time at all, yet I would highly recommend them for the job of cleaning the bird shit out of cuckoo clocks

"More entertaining than peeling an orange" - The Sun.

"He's better than dipping your biscuit in a cup of tea" - The Mirror.

"Pretentious twat" - The Guardian

I just thought that I would leave you some words to cheer you up:

Boogle - a pack of weasels

Persnickety - to be fussy

Aardwark - my all time favourite word after

Llamellibranchiata.

Hope those words cheer you up.

How did it feel to pop your cherry babe??

*snigger*

Pop your cherry

*snigger*

p.s. the person below is actually quite dangerous and has been banned from Facebook for been to ugly

Last night I dreamed of Honey, and then I woke up covered in Bees and then spent 2 days in the hospital cos I went into anaphylactic shock.

I'm gonna stick with sugar.

I though I would leave this nursey rhyme:

Yesterday upon the stair

I met a man who wasn't there.

He wasn't there again today

Oh my God its that nonce off My Space and he wants my butt!!

On personality alone this is a 100% Hottie.

Mind you I thought the Elephant Man was quiet handsome....

Sorry sweety. I have an STD. Not from me so it's you poppet.

Don't forget the Ajax....

In our survey 9 out of 10 people thought Horsebox was a w*nker.

The remaining 1 person thought he was a scruffy dog.

In our survey 9 out of 10 cat owners said their cats prefered to use Horsebox rather than a litter tray.

I miss you man. The way a cow misses its gut flora. Without I just don't shit properly

I can honestly say that I have met this person in real life, and she is indeed real.

You know samrt and good looking. That would normally get a thumbs up from me, but sorry babes you have terrible taste in music. Go and stand in the corner..

You had five stars so I took one away from you 'cause I'm a c**t

Why do you hate me so much??

*waves manically*

Hello!!!!!!!

Dear Sir,

I have known this young man for nearly 15 years. In all that time I have found him to be tiresome and dull. However, I would not hestitate to recommend him for the job of cleaning up the cuckoo shit in your Cuckoo Clock factory.

regards.

This man is old, and knackered. Please avoid.

I noticed you where looking at my profile, so I just thought I would pop into yours and ask "What??". "Do you want a photograph??"

I thought your interests said "Seriuos about Scotsmen"...that would be a little gay..

Just thought I would drop in and say Hi....

Hi...

Why are there not Cats In Hats?? I am saddened

Just thought I would drop in and say Hi.....

Hi

Just thought I would say Hi....

Hi.

Why aren't you on my friend list??

Are we ever going to meet up, or is this some sort of doomed realtionsjhip when the proganists never meet, a sort of Anti-Love Story. Actually that sounds cool. So I'll start then.....I hate you

I don't really