Drivad

Early to the pub #awkward

Man got a radio 1 play blud

Literally nothing at all to eat in my house

Slewed at poker. I'm like James Bond in Casino Royale, only not underwhelming or sponsored by Sony

I feel like a prize asshole, no-one even mentions my casserole

I sometimes forget Mark Zuckerberg is a real life person, just like I forget that Justin Timberlake is actually fictional

Stephen Fry, what a lad

No Avast, that is not a virus, it is a ticket website. Dick

Never been so tired in my whole life ever

Tired and drunk and craving some bacon

Having Johnny Giles tell you that you bust 'class moves' is like Hitler saying you're good at genocide, but better

Why is it cheaper to fly to Germany than it is to get a bus to Gatwick?!

Very tempted to sod saving for uni and spend all of my money attending European music festivals all summer