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Hugh Jass

By Hugh Jass,
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Woffy
Woffy

Chris is actually his middle name. His real first name is Featuring.

maelzoid
maelzoid

My guess is a secret set, performing Parachutes in full. I expect fairly early on the pyramid. It'd be madness to try getting them into the park or JP. Historically these secret sets are not that secr

H.M.V
H.M.V

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Padgey Community Regular

Padgey

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Friday Headliner - Foals featuring Chris Martin

Saturday Headliner - Taylor Swift featuring Chris Martin

Sunday Headliner - Fleetwood Mac featuring Chris Martin

Legend Slot - Elton John featuring Chris Martin

Wednesday Croissant Neuf Bandstand - Mik Artistik featuring Chris Martin

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maelzoid Mentor

maelzoid

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My guess is a secret set, performing Parachutes in full. I expect fairly early on the pyramid. It'd be madness to try getting them into the park or JP. Historically these secret sets are not that secret, so it'll be rammed. Although the casuals at the pyramid may be surprised!

For the record, I like Chris Martin. It seems his big crime is unabashed enthusiasm and honestly there are enough miserable gits in the world. Coldplay are a great band too, and their 2016 set was brilliant.

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danbailey80 Proficient

danbailey80

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There's no way one of the biggest bands in the world will open the festival. 

They love headlining the festival so why would they waste a year doing the shit Other stage slot only to have to wait another 3/4 years to headline again?

They will either headline or headline the year(s) after (2021/2022).

Also is anyone getting bored of the weak jokes about Chris performing everywhere?

Could he have said yes to Stormzy a while back and then found it hard to say no to Kylie as it linked up with her cancer and Coldplay covering the same song years before when she was unwell? He'd be well aware of everyone saying he's a knob for doing it but did it anyway as he wants to help out. Give the twat a break. 

 

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Hugh Jass Grand Master

Hugh Jass

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19 minutes ago, danbailey80 said:

There's no way one of the biggest bands in the world will open the festival. 

 

Let's turn that on its head for a minute... How do you celebrate the 50th anniversary of the biggest festival in the world? By getting one of the biggest bands in the world and known friends of the festival to open it. (I'm talking Pyramid, not Other).

A Coldplay 11am Pyramid slot makes perfect sense for all parties. It's a massive event to kick off the celebrations (arguably a bigger story than whoever headlines that night). The band get to play to a massive crowd and be a significant part of it all without the complaints about them headlining yet again. People who like Coldplay get to see Coldplay.

It's win win win.

Oh and jokes about Chris Martin playing everywhere will never tire.

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FuzzyDunlop Mentor

FuzzyDunlop

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1 hour ago, Hugh Jass said:

Let's face facts, he's going to pop up somewhere isn't he? The question is where?

I'm sticking money down on Coldplay opening the Pyramid on Friday then the Martinator shuffling out to do something with Swifty.

Red Dead Ed Sheeran will turn up with Swift.

To be honest, that is the number one biggest reason I have to not watch Swift. 

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FuzzyDunlop Mentor

FuzzyDunlop

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1 minute ago, Hugh Jass said:

Let's turn that on its head for a minute... How do you celebrate the 50th anniversary of the biggest festival in the world? By getting one of the biggest bands in the world to open it? (I'm talking Pyramid, not Other).

A Coldplay 11am Pyramid slot makes perfect sense for all parties. It's a massive event to kick off the celebrations (arguably a bigger story than whoever headlines that night). The band get to play to a massive crowd and be a significant part of it all without the complaints about them headlining yet again. People who like Coldplay get to see Coldplay.

It's win win win.

Oh and jokes about Chris Martin playing everywhere will never tire.

Apart from everyone watching Coldplay

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stuie Grand Master

stuie

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1 hour ago, danbailey80 said:

Give the twat a break. 

PMSL.  Made me choke on my coffee.

1 hour ago, Hugh Jass said:

A Coldplay 11am Pyramid slot makes perfect sense for all parties. It's a massive event to kick off the celebrations (arguably a bigger story than whoever headlines that night). The band get to play to a massive crowd and be a significant part of it all without the complaints about them headlining yet again. People who like Coldplay get to see Coldplay.

I reckon you could be right here.  Coldplay + friends opening.

55 minutes ago, Padgey said:

Coldplay new album next month, now gone favourites to headline!!!

Way too soon.  I think Coldplay and Glasto both understand that the same headliners can't be wheeled out again for the 50th.

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FuzzyDunlop Mentor

FuzzyDunlop

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Coldplay headlining is the only potential headliner I will actually be annoyed at. I'll be honest, I can't stand Coldplay, but I do dislike other acts even more - however if Coldplay headline again it is the most unimaginative cop out there would be.

Anyone barring the Cure should headline before Coldplay and I include the Killers and Stormzy in that and they headlined this year. I am fully behind Swift, Foals - even the god awful 1975 headlining before Coldplay.

 

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Padjeq Proficient

Padjeq

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Coldplay opening will get them the defining image of the festival: Every year it's the punters-stretching-to-the-horizon sun soaked arena bowl mega crowd that the sunday legends get. It's one of the blank spaces in Chris Martin's sticker album.

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maelzoid Mentor

maelzoid

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I've stated how much I like Coldplay, but they absolutely should not be headlining again for the foreseeable future.

When they do headline again (and I'm sure it will happen) I hope the wait has genuinely been long enough that it actually feels like an event.

Same for Muse.

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