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alibear

Overheards and funnies

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4 minutes ago, pie_and_a_pint said:

That was fecking hilarious. I spilled my drink!

Did he strip off? Which day? Was there on the Friday but left halfway through as the sound failed and we couldn’t hear. Annoying!

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Twice within sight of the pyramid stage, I heard a couple of mates say to the other, is that the pyramid stage?! 

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Stood at Park just as The Good The Bad and The Queen came on and this girl turned to her mate and said;

" How many Blur songs do they play?"

Her mate turned round to her and said;

"Oh lots! Thats who we are seeing"

I tapped them on the shoulder and said that it wasn't Blur and told them it was TGTBTQ.

Safe to say they left.

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The bunch of who were camped next to us said how happy they were that they were showing Love Island. I hope you are happy @august1

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Lizzo kept telling everyone to look at themselves in the mirror when they get home that night and to tell yourself you love you. A guy behind us: "we're in tents love, they don't have mirrors!"

During Janelle Monae when she kept saying "God, are you listening?". Some guy: "I'm listening"

Before Janelle Monae I was sat on the ground 3 rows from the front and some incredibly drunk guy holding a flag came and sat next to me and fell asleep while sitting upright. A poor lady behind him had to hold his flag to stop it falling on people.

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The most non Glastonbury conversation I've heard at Glastonbury;  I was eating at a table sat next to a couple with what I took to be  their daughter and son-in-law discussing what yacht the son-in-law was going to buy and that he might have to settle for a dinghy - just imagine the horror of having to settle for a dinghy!!

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Not so much an overheard but on Sunday night/Monday morning in the unfairground some absolutely smashed guy came over and started mumbling rubbish then proceeded to roll a cigarette. He didn't let any minor details like not having any skins or tobacco get in the way, when he licked the 'paper' of the non existent mime cigarette to finish the roll I had to remove myself from the situation. I absolutely lost it 

Edited by concerned
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Walking past the Other Stage on the Sunday: "Is that the Pyramid Stage?"

 

At Janelle Monae when she got some people on stage:

Janelle: "Do you got the juice?"

Lady on stage: "I love you so much!"

Janelle: "But do you got the juice?"

Lady: "Thank you!"

Edited by barkley87
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1 hour ago, Homer said:

Did he strip off? Which day? Was there on the Friday but left halfway through as the sound failed and we couldn’t hear. Annoying!

It was Saturday.  Let’s just say the suggested location was a sauna... 🤣

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40 minutes ago, barkley87 said:

At Janelle Monae when she got some people on stage:

Janelle: "Do you got the juice?"

Lady on stage: "I love you so much!"

Janelle: "But do you got the juice?"

Lady: "Thank you!"

This was fucking hilarious!

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2 hours ago, Homer said:

Naked guy walking around the park yesterday afternoon too.

Bit of a way for Bramble FM to run in that heat

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6 hours ago, Mr_Egregious said:

In a broad Scouse accent from a nearby tent...

”SOMEONE’S HAD A SHIT ON A PLATE”

HAHAHAHA!

Edited by alibear

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1 hour ago, Quark said:

Bit of a way for Bramble FM to run in that heat

Bit of an aside to the thread but I happened to be walking past when they finished and they were in tears.  It made me well up even though I have little experience of them.  

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4 hours ago, Madyaker said:

Did anyone see the mad fella that was going around shouting about how the cops better stay from him? I passed him near the bandstand and then a few hours later on the ground with 4 coppers sitting on him! Dope.

Was this Thursday lunchtime?  We crossed a scouser who was shouting all sorts of nonsense there who had no wristband on.

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Janelle Monae - “Let have some self-love”

Male friend - “She be celebratin’ masturbatin’. That scans doesn’t it?”

🤣

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15 hours ago, Ayrshire Chris said:

At the longdrops on the railway track next to the Avalon entrance.  A guy wearing nothing but flip flops, a silver hat  and tiny gold pants was looking in vain at every cubicle for a clean one but they were rank rotten.  My good lady came out of one and said to him, try in here, I’ve just cleaned the seat.  Oh my god he screamed, thank you so much, I love you, will you be my mummy. !   Not a word of a lie, I just went into hysterics. One of those glasto moments. 

I meant to add that afterwards he offered to buy us a drink but I could not for the life of me work out where he kept his cash! 

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19 hours ago, Homer said:

Did he strip off? Which day? Was there on the Friday but left halfway through as the sound failed and we couldn’t hear. Annoying!

Saturday afternoon. It was 'Meanwhile, in Lost Horizons Sauna.........' I think and he just ran on stage starkers. I honestly thought Stephen Frost was about to have an aneurism...

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5 minutes ago, pie_and_a_pint said:

Saturday afternoon. It was 'Meanwhile, in Lost Horizons Sauna.........' I think and he just ran on stage starkers. I honestly thought Stephen Frost was about to have an aneurism...

Gutted - was on my list to go but my mate was quite insistent he wanted to see Fontaines DC (they were quite good to be fair)

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5 minutes ago, Homer said:

Gutted - was on my list to go but my mate was quite insistent he wanted to see Fontaines DC (they were quite good to be fair)

I was there totally by accident - had intended to go to Fontaines at WG but it was so packed (and the racket from the bloody Meeting POint Bar meant I had no chance of hearing from outside) and I needed shade so I went to the Astrolabe instead.

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One girl turns to her friend just as they walked into row mead and said AND THIS IS CALLED THE PYRAMID STAGE.... Doh 

And some bloke was like 

I COULD EAT AN APPLE AT THIS FESTIVAL...... 

Oo and the funnest one was a lady trying to get into a crew camp site to use the toilet.. Crew lady said no there's toilets just down there.... BUT THEY SMELL she said lol that was day one lol 

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Wednesday early pm - two guys back of their teens or early twenties sitting by John Peel Tent

"Must've taken them ages to put all these trees in, weren't here last time"

"Yeah, amazing what they do innit"

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Two Lads outside john peel tent during Gerry Cinnamon,

1st Lad :John Peel was he Prime Minister ?

2nd Lad : Not Sure i think so !

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Totally forgot about this until my wife jogged my memory this morning....

Group of around 10-12 youngish (mid 20s) lads and lasses standing in front of us before Lauryn Hill, all of them were pretty spangled, gurning away but having lots of fun.

10 minutes into her set one of the lads takes a bit of a turn and needs a sit down, going very pale and eyes rolling around. 

A couple of the lads hold him up and give him some water, I asked if he was OK and they said “he’ll be fine, we’ve rung for a doctor”. 

We were then a bit concerned, as were others in the crowd around them. 

5 minutes later a guy dressed in fancy dress as a doctor comes through the crowd, presumably their mate. 

“Don’t worry lads the doc is here”. 

Gets out a big bag of coke and gives the lad a huge key. 

5 minutes later he’s up on his feet partying away again!!

 

Edited by nikkic
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Just remembered another one, can't remember where it was but a bloke and his girlfriend walking past. 

Bloke: why don't you just go in there (pointing at the long drops)

Girl: JAKE! Do I look like a c**t!? I'm not going in there!

Jake rolls his eyes and they walk on

 

This was on Thursday morning. Im assuming she had a long festival, probably not as long as Jake though.

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