alibear Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 (edited) I always enjoy reading these. What’s the funniest thing you overheard? Nothing too hilarious from me this year, but here are a couple to kick off: Lad 1: “who’s on next?” Lad 2: “David Attenborough.” Lad 1: “ah, cool. I like him, I reckon he’s gonna boss it” And the whole crowd around me (including myself) responding with a collective “oh, for fuck’s sake” when Kylie introduced Chris Martin. Edited July 1, 2019 by alibear 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fightoffyour Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 “Why do you always have to start licking people?” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nikkic Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 Overheard this between a couple in the queue for the loos post Mylie... Girl : You were really rude to Gareth then. Boy : What do you mean? Girl : He came over to say hello and you just completely ignored him. Boy : Look I’m here for the music, it’s called Glastonbury not Garethstonbury. 1 36 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AiiShotTheDJ Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 Stood at the back for Kylie- the guy next to me was waiting for Jason D to make an appearance. He commented “I bet she’ll drag up all the relics for this set- watch, Elvis will fucking turn up in a bit”. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pilton digger Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 Ran into someone i know who asked what we had just seen. Told him Fat White Family. In all seriousness he asked if it was a Barry White tribute act. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doogie Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 When The Cure went off stage and the lights went down just before their finale: "Well it's not going to be a costume change is it?" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spindles Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 "Aw man, I needed that. That chunder really sorted me out mate" "Yeah?" "Yeah. Got any ket?" 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_Egregious Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 In a broad Scouse accent from a nearby tent... ”SOMEONE’S HAD A SHIT ON A PLATE” 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirjonnyp Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 Be Thursday evening we were cleaning the toilet block next to the wow stage. It was heaving and trying to stop people from using cubicles as they became available was getting increasingly difficult as the queues built up. Me: sorry, we need to hold on to this one so my mate can clean it next. Her (thick scouse accent, looking utterly bewildered): why?! Me: we need to clean them. Her: BUT WHY?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crocodiles Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 Well dodged the fucking bullet robbie not turning up to duet with Kylie.....that was me after panicking for 5 mins the c**t may turn up 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalifire Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 Not really Glasto related but as I was passing by William’s Green on Friday, I heard these words from a middle aged woman: “Just lube up your ass before you go out. Seriously. Trust me.” Stayed with me all weekend, that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deaf Nobby Burton Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 A group of guys leaving the Streets: “Have you got so and so? Yeah, don’t worry I’ve got his head” As this poor bloke was dragged out by his hair. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quark Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 "Of course it's sunny, it's called Somerset for a reason. I mean it's not called Autumnset is it?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aragorn Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 2 middle aged blokes with their other halves and kids talking about poos in long drops "yeah I like to wee on them I do, try and break them down abit, saw one the other day and it had what looked like a head on it - so I pissed on it and lopped the head off" I turned round and laughed out loud as they carried on talking about it 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the_arsonist Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 This was about 8am Sunday heard from a nearby tent: Lad 1: *makes very loud chundering noise* About 5 mins pass... Lad 2: Urgh mate were you just sick in the tent? No response, a couple of minutes later... Lad 1: What the fuck have I been sick or something? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OddRon Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 20 year old lad behind us instantly nudging his mate and going "I still would" when Kylie came out 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGoodWillOut Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 Guy on the phone to his wife “ yeah having a nice time love, just chilling at the mo, miss you and the kids” he was sat in a long drop at the time Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
doogie Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 When Chris Martin appeared yet again: "He'd better not show up to my grandson's barmitzvah next week" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tumbles Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 When Nick Cave came on ’Is that her Dad’ 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sirjonnyp Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 3 minutes ago, tumbles said: When Nick Cave came on ’Is that her Dad’ Please tell that that was one of Seth or Sam? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICGenie Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 Found myself walking behind a couple of youngsters who first said that they were planning to volunteer and skank their shifts if they hadn’t got tickets. They then proceeded to talk about how this was the first festival where they hadn’t bought cheap disposable tents. If it had been the Internet I’d have been convinced they were trolls... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bucko Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 Lad "all the flys round here are doing my head in" Lads mate " yeah that fuckin no fly zone hasn't worked very well" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tumbles Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 5 minutes ago, sirjonnyp said: Please tell that that was one of Seth or Sam? No. Sammy did manage to mutter ‘who’s Micheal’ on the Wednesday to me tho Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TKOCF Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 (edited) ”You’re an honorary member of the piss circle” Also the lifting up of people on chairs just before Killers, the first time everyone chanted “DOWN IT DOWN IT” was funny, by the ninth time, not as much... Edited July 1, 2019 by TKOCF Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tartan_Glasto Posted July 1, 2019 Report Share Posted July 1, 2019 In the queue for the toilet at the Glastonbury sign. Girl behind me: “I wish I could look as glamorous as those girls at a festival.” Her friend: “What? Them?” (just as some less traditionally attractive women passed by) Girl behind me: “Eww, god no” Me: Burst out laughing at a pleasant comment going sour so quick. Turned to them and went “I love you” haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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