Article on Girls Festival vulnerability

[ravermum]

Second time we’ve had a thread about women at the festival in recent weeks that’s descended into one man telling a group of women they’re wrong about something for them/about them. Shout out to all the men on this thread speaking back to this bullshit and shout out also to the women and men posting here or reading this who this is triggering anything for. This is real stuff that people (many of them women) really experience. If you have no experience, you can listen and learn and we will welcome you, if you don’t, you can jog on and we’ll come together however we please - online or in real life. Stop trying to shame or silence others. Don’t @ me by the way. I’m here to represent, not to engage with trolls

[gherkin8r]

1 minute ago, SouthbanKen said:

I’m out. Enjoy your festival dude. 

I will leave you with a thought. 

In the U.K. 20% of women have experienced some type of sexual assault since the age of 16. That is one in five.  If you know 5 women and none of them have talked to you about their experience of sexual assault and harassment, it’s not because it hasn’t happened, it’s because they don’t trust you to believe them. 

I have a female partner and a daughter. The fact that you are painting me as untrustworthy of hearing about the abuse of women is frankly shocking. I hope some day you realise how warped your view point is. 

Goodnight

[gherkin8r]

2 minutes ago, ravermum said:

Second time we’ve had a thread about women at the festival in recent weeks that’s descended into one man telling a group of women they’re wrong about something for them/about them. Shout out to all the men on this thread speaking back to this bullshit and shout out also to the women and men posting here or reading this who this is triggering anything for. This is real stuff that people (many of them women) really experience. If you have no experience, you can listen and learn and we will welcome you, if you don’t, you can jog on and we’ll come together however we please - online or in real life. Stop trying to shame or silence others. Don’t @ me by the way. I’m here to represent, not to engage with trolls

Lol

[I feel like Pablo]

1 minute ago, gherkin8r said:

Yes it is. Of course it is. Reverse the colours in my analogy then.

If a black person was to say they were attacked by a white person for example that wouldn't proclude a white person from having an opinion if they objected to a statement such as "blacks need to stick together cos whites don't take us seriously". 

Black people are attacked by white people. That isn't a hypothetical situation. If I were black I would definitely mistrust white people. The evidence is there to show I should mistrust them. 

This has gone off topic. 

I read that arguing with people on the internet does nothing to change their opinion it only further entrenches their feelings.

So I too will rescind from this thread. I hope you can reflect and perhaps understand where I and others have been coming from. 

[I feel like Pablo]

4 minutes ago, ravermum said:

Second time we’ve had a thread about women at the festival in recent weeks that’s descended into one man telling a group of women they’re wrong about something for them/about them. Shout out to all the men on this thread speaking back to this bullshit and shout out also to the women and men posting here or reading this who this is triggering anything for. This is real stuff that people (many of them women) really experience. If you have no experience, you can listen and learn and we will welcome you, if you don’t, you can jog on and we’ll come together however we please - online or in real life. Stop trying to shame or silence others. Don’t @ me by the way. I’m here to represent, not to engage with trolls

Here here. 

 

2 minutes ago, gherkin8r said:

Lol

You really laugh at that? This is you, right now, in this moment, not taking a woman seriously. 

Anyway I said I was going to stop so this is me stopping.  Good night and thank you to men here who are allies and have been fighting our corner. My upvotes may be out but my respect for you will never be. 

[jow95]

30 minutes ago, SouthbanKen said:

I’m out. Enjoy your festival dude. 

I will leave you with a thought. 

In the U.K. 20% of women have experienced some type of sexual assault since the age of 16. That is one in five.  If you know 5 women and none of them have talked to you about their experience of sexual assault and harassment, it’s not because it hasn’t happened, it’s because they don’t trust you to believe them. 

Big leap to suggest that every woman who doesn’t tell you about their experiences of harassment is doing so because they don’t think you’ll believe them. 

[gherkin8r]

Not my words, the words of top gear magazine

"If you know 5 women and none of them have talked to you about their experience of sexual assault and harassment, it’s not because it hasn’t happened, it’s because they don’t trust you to believe them." 

[gherkin8r]

Men be careful, women are lying to you because they don't trust you 

Unreal

[Cooter]

metcheck forecasting more settled weather towards the end of this week with less if any rainfall towards the festival weekend. lets ave it!!

eta, oops 

Edited June 8, 2019 by Cooter

[gherkin8r]

A man obviously wrote that

Ergo it means nothing

[BlackZeppelin]

51 minutes ago, gherkin8r said:

A man obviously wrote that

Ergo it means nothing

Well  a 50 year old man with a 19 year old daughter attending the festival, wrote this:

Gherin8r, I have rewritten this message a  and taken out the bit where I say: "Shut the fuck up you twat", because I genuinely hope you are bewildered rather than delibrately antagonistic.

My guess is you've been drinking a bit too deeply from the well of Jordan Peterson, Milo Yiannopolous and co, and have decided to make any "womens issues" on this forum,  an opportunity to stand up for repressed  manhood or whatever. 

Unfortunately, you have once again hijacked a conversation ( like you did with the womens tent) and demonstrated through your tone and language your unconscious chauvinism.

Have a careful and critical  re-read of your own comments and as several have advised maybe sit back and have a listen.

You won't of course.

[gherkin8r]

1 minute ago, BlackZeppelin said:

Well  a 50 year old man with a 19 year old daughter attending the festival, wrote this:

Gherin8r, I have rewritten this message a  and taken out the bit where I say: "Shut the fuck up you twat", because I genuinely hope you are bewildered rather than delibrately antagonistic.

My guess is you've been drinking a bit too deeply from the well of Jordan Peterson, Milo Yiannopolous and co, and have decided to make any "womens issues" on this forum,  an opportunity to stand up for repressed  manhood or whatever. 

Unfortunately, you have once again hijacked a conversation ( like you did with the womens tent) and demonstrated through your tone and language your unconscious chauvinism.

Have a careful and critical  re-read of your own comments and as several have advised maybe sit back and have a listen.

You won't of course.

I have literally zero time for Jordan or milo. I don't feel that men are oppressed. 

Just to clarify 

[carlosj]

1 hour ago, I feel like Pablo said:

Here here. 

 

You really laugh at that? This is you, right now, in this moment, not taking a woman seriously. 

Anyway I said I was going to stop so this is me stopping.  Good night and thank you to men here who are allies and have been fighting our corner. My upvotes may be out but my respect for you will never be. 

Thanks for your posts tonight.

[barkley87]

This is separate to the...debate...that's been going on tonight, but there's a trick I use to help me feel a bit safer in my tent at night that might benefit other ladies on here too (if you are still here):

Once you're in your tent clip the two zips on the inside of the door to the sleeping area together. I use a food bag clip like this. That way, if anyone tries to get in from the outside the zips won't actually open the door. Hopefully as most sexual predators are opportunistic that will put them off and they'll just leave. 

Edited June 9, 2019 by barkley87

[R95wilson]

Shocked to read about all the stuff gals have to go through, especially at the festival, always been hugely niave to this at the fest. Recently a man from my home town got killed for intervening when a guy was being aggressive towards his girlfriend. One punch and he was gone forever. Not saying this is a valid reason to not intervene but maybe why some would not. Think most like to think they'd intervene, but most probably wouldn't.

Edit: I realise my story isn't really that relevant to festivals I guess

Edited June 9, 2019 by R95wilson

[SouthbanKen]

6 hours ago, jow95 said:

Big leap to suggest that every woman who doesn’t tell you about their experiences of harassment is doing so because they don’t think you’ll believe them. 

Yeah, you are probably right, and it wasn’t really supposed to be aimed directly at an individual but by the point i wrote it I was frustrated.

The point is, as men, we all go through life and know hundreds maybe thousands of women. If we are lucky we get really close to a number, for some it might only be a handful for others it might be a dozen, twenty maybe more. 

I have been been “fortunate” enough that 4 women in my life (My girlfriend, my mum, two close friends) have trusted me enough to tell me some of their personal experiences of sexual harassment. 

Maybe I should have phrased it more like this. 1 in 5 women in the U.K. have experienced sexual assault, if you have 5 women in your life that you are close to, why do you think they are not talking to you about it. Again, the you here is broad and generic not aimed at an individual, it’s aimed at all men who refuse to see what is in front of them because it doesn’t directly affect them.

“If your not a part of the solution, your a part of the problem - what’s your contribution to life” Jurassic 5

 

[Homer]

11 hours ago, Curlygirl said:

I’m over it Pet, but it really is a stark reminder that there are arseholes everywhere. Lovely to see you yesterday ? 

Jesus - glad you dealt with it so well (at the time and since). Xxx

[gherkin8r]

Woman says men don't care about women

Man says men do care about women

Everyone jumps on man

 

[Homer]

9 hours ago, ravermum said:

Shout out to all the men on this thread speaking back to this bullshit and shout out also to the women and men posting here or reading this who this is triggering anything for. This is real stuff that people (many of them women) really experience. If you have no experience, you can listen and learn and we will welcome you, if you don’t, you can jog on and we’ll come together however we please - online or in real life. 

Missed this whole debate last night and have just read this last page; but am out of upvotes and, whatever the context, this is surely pretty much the whole point ☝️

[Homer]

39 minutes ago, gherkin8r said:

Woman says men don't care about women

Man says men do care about women

Everyone jumps on man

 

Maybe take a back seat and consider that perhaps this thread isn’t all about you? ?

[Mr.Tease]

46 minutes ago, gherkin8r said:

Woman says men don't care about women

Man says men do care about women

Everyone jumps on man

 

Oh, so you're the real victim in all this?

[MetaKate]

Woman rolls eyes

[anditmakesmesmile]

 I find the responses on this thread quite surreal. It’s a bit like me starting a thread called “how to keep under your foreskin clean at festivals”, and then seeing a load of women telling me how I should do it. It’s not in their experience, and likewise feeling vulnerable from sexual predators at a festival isn’t in mine. I think that unless your comments are one of support you should just STFU and move on to the next thread!

[guypjfreak]

Just reading this has made it look like glastonbury is crawling with predictors which I really hope is not the case.. 

I also think that it is getting a bit off topic and everyone should calm down.. 

I can't believe anyone doesn't think this shit happens and doesn't take it seriously.. Let's hope that everyone make/female stays safe this year at ALL festivals and other places.. And if shit does happen I hope the person gets done for it but in the end women should be able to go out to festivals etc and feel safe and if this is not the case then more should be done to sort it out.. 

This goes for both sexes... 

Peace and tea old sons. 

Happy Sunday emphasise on the HAPPY 

[muddyslingbax]

There can be a lack of boundaries wherever you are; work, social settings and yes EVEN Glastonbury. Be aware and consider your safety at all times.

There's lots of things i'm hoping for at this years festival but the top 2 are no rain and a glimpse of the naked man with the nice arse running around the festival. Only looking, no touching. I couldn't catch him anyway.