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Chrisp1986

No longer 'allowed' to go

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Sp the wife has now said I can no longer go when asked if we should try for coaches today. I have to use my annual leave for family time and not going there. She doesn't want to leave daughter for just 4 nights and now been told not going at all. Only get 5 weeks a/l per year and work 48 hours a week! Glastonbury is my only escape!

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2 minutes ago, Chrisp1986 said:

Sp the wife has now said I can no longer go when asked if we should try for coaches today. I have to use my annual leave for family time and not going there. She doesn't want to leave daughter for just 4 nights and now been told not going at all. Only get 5 weeks a/l per year and work 48 hours a week! Glastonbury is my only escape!

Maybe an explanation of going will enhance the family time ? Or maybe take the kids for some of it ? Just thinking outloud ... it’s a tough one but even Glastonbury shouldn’t be something you come to major disagreement over 

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tricky balancing act, this will be my first "reduced" year due to family stuff but I am still going after much haggling 🙂

Maybe take this year off but make an agreement that next year you can go for the big anniversary.

Hope you get it sorted to an acceptable level for all involved 

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48 minutes ago, Chrisp1986 said:

Sp the wife has now said I can no longer go when asked if we should try for coaches today. I have to use my annual leave for family time and not going there. She doesn't want to leave daughter for just 4 nights and now been told not going at all. Only get 5 weeks a/l per year and work 48 hours a week! Glastonbury is my only escape!

There’s a Dolly Parton song that might help here...

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7 minutes ago, Hugh Jass said:

There’s a Dolly Parton song that might help here...

A certain Elbow song also springs to mind

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A possible solution could be that you go to the festival with a mate for a shorter time and suggest to your wife that she could have a few days away on a girly weekend while you have a one to one with your daughter.

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Personally I think "all leave for family time" is a bit too much but everybody is different.

Whilst family is mega important I also think time without kids either with or without your partner is just as important.

Time to get the bargaining chips out so either a belter bit of family time promise or bribes to the missus.

Good luck.

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My dad often likes to remind me that he missed out on seeing Pink floyd cos I was close to being born (should've planned it better then 🤷🏼‍♀️) so i'd say go to save your kids the same boring story in 20 years time 😂

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5 minutes ago, Dillyblue said:

A possible solution could be that you go to the festival with a mate for a shorter time and suggest to your wife that she could have a few days away on a girly weekend while you have a one to one with your daughter.

Just do this. 

Don't miss the festival, mate.

Do anything to get there.

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take the year off on the condition you will never take another year off ever.

 

I did that one year, now I will never do it again. this is my Christmas god damn it. the rest of the year is all about family , every day, this is my only me time. I don;t go to the pub every weekend, i don;t go out that often. So Glastonbury is for me .

 

the wife often comments on the run up to Glastonbury about how I have been in such a good mood for the past few weeks

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on the assumption that right now you don't have ticket (trying for - in your post), then the solution is simple:

Try for tickets and if you fail then it was fate, you're happy you tried, she's happy that you're not going.

If you get tickets then, well, that shit just got real.

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22 minutes ago, Dillyblue said:

A possible solution could be that you go to the festival with a mate for a shorter time and suggest to your wife that she could have a few days away on a girly weekend while you have a one to one with your daughter.

That's pretty much my situation. Friday-Sunday is better than no Glasto at all... I now need to start the Thursday haggling :)

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Honestly, without sounding like a prick, i would tell her to do one. Sounds like you work your balls off and don't do much else. This is your time to have your own space and do your own thing, something that we all need in life, it's healthy and perfectly normal. 

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Tricky balancing act with family and holiday and Glastonbury... We now alternate years as a result, and tend to travel to site later and leave Sunday to save days holiday for other childcare, family holidays etc. So, understand this is a tricky one.

Only answer is talking about it.

 

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Maybe have a cry in front of her so she knows you really need to go?

Seriously though. I hope she comes to her senses. We have a 14 month old, my partner works 6am-6pm Monday to Friday and should really do saturdays but appreciates family time. If he turned around and said he wanted to go on a lads weekend I would be shoving him out the door because time apart is just as important for relationship growth. 

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Sad to hear that, I would never stop my other half doing something he loved, think you should try for tickets anyway and as others have said just go for the weekend. 

Charm x

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3 minutes ago, cb4747 said:

Maybe have a cry in front of her so she knows you really need to go?

Seriously though. I hope she comes to her senses. We have a 14 month old, my partner works 6am-6pm Monday to Friday and should really do saturdays but appreciates family time. If he turned around and said he wanted to go on a lads weekend I would be shoving him out the door because time apart is just as important for relationship growth. 

Think the crying thing works better when women are doing it, think I would laugh at Mr Charm if he cried about wanting to go to Glastonbury.  

Charm x

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Just now, Charm said:

Think the crying thing works better when women are doing it, think I would laugh at Mr Charm if he cried about wanting to go to Glastonbury.  

Charm x

Haha if my partner cried about Glasto, I'd cry too and we would be an emotional festival loving mess together 😂

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My wife is taking the kids away for weekend. It’s a fair deal that allows her to enjoy my absence. Perhaps suggest that 🤷‍♂️

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3 minutes ago, tumbles said:

My wife is taking the kids away for weekend. It’s a fair deal that allows her to enjoy my absence. Perhaps suggest that 🤷‍♂️

my wife and I have a similiar agreemnet

 

but basically she does what the Fuck she wants, and so do I , no grief no guilt tripping.

 

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... joke. I'd try phrasing it that it's a gamble (in hr favour) if you'll get one anyway, so let's leave it in the lap of the gods and I'll try.

 

I'd also go Thursday afternoon and go back Monday morning.

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Sorry but I don;t think anyone should dictate a few days away can;t be done. Have you had any other weekends away without her/the kids ?

 

You said 'we should try for coach tickets ' - were you wanting to go together, maybe she just doesn;t feel the love for the festival any more, would you want to do it without her, if the answer is yes then have a sensible chat and agree to go Friday - Monday (eg 2 days off ) and have a darn good hair let down. I would never ever stop an OH from doing anything .... but then I don;t have children

I can understand if Glastonbury would take all the money and there would be nothing left in the pot for a family trip, but if you can do both and its a matter of days/week off then I'd be inclined to say go for it

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