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The Weather Thread 2019


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2 hours ago, deebeedoobee said:

He said no press photos as he is decidedly shabby this morning and will not be going out in the wet where the ram jam jar is. He has agreed to release his modelling portfolio photo.

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You have to save us Big Dog! 

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1 hour ago, JoeyT said:

We're all listening... You can't say that and not give us the story!

You twisted my arm... put another log on the fire and pass the hip flask. It's a long yarn, but a good one.

Anyone who was there in 2007 knows there was only one way to survive that weekend - and it wasn't to be present in your own head. 

My housemate and I had made the dubious choice of buying a load of random crap from EDIT before the festival (the folly of youth!) - various leaves, extracts and pills... almost all absolutely awful resulting in grinding teeth and headaches. By Saturday morning there was nothing left apart from tired legs and crushing hangovers, so we made the executive decision to head over to Dance Village and take in a Wrong Music showcase whilst keeping an eye out for passing, ahem, 'businessmen' who might sell us something that actually works.

Didn't take us long and we'd found someone who sold me a handful of "absolute bangers, mate" outside a bar tent... in the pouring rain, I decided the safest place for them was a container that used to contain some of the legal highs. As I'm closing up the lid, I get a tap on the shoulder from a Stuart Security bloke... look round and there's three of them. 

B*llocks.

I quickly made sure to tell them my friend had eff all to do with any of it and he disappeared to let our other friends know what had happened whilst security took 'care' of me behind one of the fences. Gave me the full unpleasant security experience to the best of their abilities... in my bag I had the remnants of the legal highs, over half an ounce of lovely thai stick and the newly acquired pills and a few bits of clothing... everything including my clothes and bag got dropped in the mud whilst they "searched". The security meatheads made sure I knew I'd be arrested, ejected from the festival and would end up with a court date in the next month or so... they even said I'd be banned from future festivals.

After a thoroughly unpleasant half hr with them the Avon and Somerset police turned up with a Land Rover and took over. Drove me a short way to two portakabins they had set up just outside the fence with another guy who was obviously in a similar situation to conduct formal searches. The other guy got led by another PC into one of the rooms first and as he did, he flicked a little baggy out of his pocket into the mud. The officer standing with me, saw it, picked it up and gave it to the other cop then came back to me...

"Did you see that?"

"Yeah, did he toss a baggy into the mud?"

"Yep, now my colleague has to get his rubber gloves on and give him the full works. You're not going to do anything that silly are you?"

"Err, absolutely not officer..!"

From then on we had a pretty decent banter going... he took me into the other portakabin and took all the dodgy stuff out of my bag... legal stuff on one side, pills and weed on the other. We were in there probably 30 mins waiting for transport to the temporary cells at the Showground and we chatted the whole time... he was complaining about the fact security kept bringing them in soft targets like me who "aren't causing any trouble, but just cutting loose on their time off" who the cops really didn't care about rather than genuinely violent/nasty people who would make the festival dangerous and unpleasant for everyone else. By the end of it we had agreed in any other circumstance we'd probably enjoy sharing a pint together. He said the worst I'd get was a caution and a free bus back into the site.

When the transport to the showground arrived, the guy took my bag of weed, put it with the legal highs and told me to put it all back in my bag. "I need to send the pills for testing because that's what you were brought in for, but I'm happy everything over here is fine and you won't get searched again"

Utter legend of a man.

Was at the showground for around 3-4 hours... everyone else was there for an hour or so. Get in, test the drugs, caution, back on the bus. After 3 hours I call over to a PC and ask what's taking so long

"Not sure, but we're having trouble with your test results. I'll try and get someone to come over."

In the end they took me for processing without the test results... the pills had tested negative for MDMA and Cocaine and those were the only tests they had on site. Yep, unless I'd accidentally bought something really weird, they were DUDS.

In the end, they bus me back to site on bail pending results of the further tests which took some explaining at the gate (everyone assumed if I was on bail rather than just getting cautioned on the spot I must have done something SERIOUS!), but I finally made it back in and back to my tent around 2am and I can honestly say I have never enjoyed a cuddle from two men and a spliff as much as I did right then.

On Sunday afternoon I had a call from the WPC who interviewed me the night before. The results had come back and the pills contained.... CAFFEINE.

???

Edited by Magma
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12 minutes ago, Bennykill said:

I fond AccuWeather the most reliable (as much as any weather forecast can be called reliable) and it doesn't have too bad a run in and a very pleasant festival.  fingers crossed

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"considerable clouds", how is that different from cloudy?! 

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14 minutes ago, Bennykill said:

I fond AccuWeather the most reliable (as much as any weather forecast can be called reliable) and it doesn't have too bad a run in and a very pleasant festival.  fingers crossed

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Stick!

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3 hours ago, deebeedoobee said:

He said no press photos as he is decidedly shabby this morning and will not be going out in the wet where the ram jam jar is. He has agreed to release his modelling portfolio photo.

BF8ECCB8-693B-4DEB-BD9F-C5E5584AFDDE.jpeg

How come you get to keep Scooby Doo as a pet?

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Generally comments at the moment are that there is continuing agreement in the models that it's going to be warming up - however there are still precipitation spikes. Even if we get the odd bit of rain, if the temps stay up we are going to be ok.

STAY STRONG

 

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1 hour ago, Bennykill said:

I fond AccuWeather the most reliable (as much as any weather forecast can be called reliable) and it doesn't have too bad a run in and a very pleasant festival.  fingers crossed

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And theyve barely changed their prediction for the week of the festival in the past couple of weeks. I'd like to think thats a good sign

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3 minutes ago, gordong said:

It’s definitely looking a lot more positive than a couple of days ago, I thought we were in deep trouble. 

Something tells me we are far from being out of the woods. This rollercoaster of emotion is only just starting baby

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