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Glastonbury Mental Health


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The National Trust are being incredibly generous, look after your well-being:

‘At this time of everything closing
the National Trust have agreed to remove all pay barriers from National Trust parks and Gardens. This is in response to do what we can for everyone at this time to support social distancing and the need to be outside in nature for our own mental wellbeing. It will mean that all the grounds behind pay barriers will now be open for everyone. In addition all carparking chargers will be removed. You can enjoy the open space and keep your social distance as per the government advice.

We will however be closing all cafes, houses, retail, and cancelling events. So take a flask and a sandwich.

There is no commercial drive behind this, it will cost the charity a significant loss in income - but we acknowledge mental health and wellbeing at this time is the priority.

Also, the National Parks are free and always open.

Stay at home as much as you can, but when you need it - nature is there for you and free’.

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13 hours ago, crazyfool1 said:

Just coming to terms with my 12 weeks self isolation ... gonna be a toughie ... but I’m not unused to challenges of late 

I'm not self-isolating yet, but I can't imagine it will be long before we're or more or less home bound. Not a great time to be single and living by yourself!!!

I can keep busy with work and all those things I always meant to get done, but being a bit of an extreme extrovert (in that I need to be around people), I think it's going to be tough....particularly if/when it gets to a point where we can't even go to friends' houses. 

My mates are all up for some boozy Skype sessions which sounds fun, but I'm sure I'll be on here a lot for a bit of company!!

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Just now, Sasperella said:

I'm not self-isolating yet, but I can't imagine it will be long before we're or more or less home bound. Not a great time to be single and living by yourself!!!

I can keep busy with work and all those things I always meant to get done, but being a bit of an extreme extrovert (in that I need to be around people), I think it's going to be tough....particularly if/when it gets to a point where we can't even go to friends' houses. 

My mates are all up for some boozy Skype sessions which sounds fun, but I'm sure I'll be on here a lot for a bit of company!!

Me neither but I’m trying to work out if I need to ... current advice is to social isolate for me I think ... but that’s impossible in my line of work ... yep agree on the single thing ... but trying to see it as fewer extra things to concern me .. like a partner that might be bringing it home and needing to try to work things out with kids . Etc .... again I’m here for a chat with absolutely anyone :) 

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13 minutes ago, crazyfool1 said:

Me neither but I’m trying to work out if I need to ... current advice is to social isolate for me I think ... but that’s impossible in my line of work ... yep agree on the single thing ... but trying to see it as fewer extra things to concern me .. like a partner that might be bringing it home and needing to try to work things out with kids . Etc .... again I’m here for a chat with absolutely anyone :) 

Also, having a partner to be hauled up at home with for three months solid would only be better if it was a partner you actually liked....I can think of a few exes that this definitely doesn't apply to :lol:

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27 minutes ago, Sasperella said:

Also, having a partner to be hauled up at home with for three months solid would only be better if it was a partner you actually liked....I can think of a few exes that this definitely doesn't apply to :lol:

Me & Mrs Q have both been working at home this week (I started last week, her company did it from Monday onwards).

We're working together in one room at the dining table, headphones in if we want to get our heads down and really crack on.

We've agreed that if one of us starts getting on the other's nerves, we can ask for a timeout.

She's asked for 17 so far.....

(exaggerated for comedic effect. It's going really well )

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Maybe try and not get tempted to hit the booze, etc too hard (even when bored). The only wobble from my generally okay stance occurred on Monday - after I'd drunk three nights in a row over the weekend. Had no hangover but that post-drinking anxiety. Was mighty relieved when it was gone on Tuesday morning!

I'm going to try and restrict drinking to weekends - and maybe a max of two nights consecutively.

Edited by Homer
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27 minutes ago, Homer said:

Maybe try and not get tempted to hit the booze, etc too hard (even when bored). The only wobble from my generally okay stance occurred on Monday - after I'd drunk three nights in a row over the weekend. Had no hangover but that post-drinking anxiety. Was mighty relieved when it was gone on Tuesday morning!

I'm going to try and restrict drinking to weekends - and maybe a max of two nights consecutively.

Yeah, I'm trying not to drink eirher. Although it's times like this that I could really do with a good pint, or ten.

But I'm trying to save money and keel my immune system strong, in case I get it. Not fortuna enough to work from home.

 

 

 

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1 hour ago, Quark said:

Me & Mrs Q have both been working at home this week (I started last week, her company did it from Monday onwards).

We're working together in one room at the dining table, headphones in if we want to get our heads down and really crack on.

We've agreed that if one of us starts getting on the other's nerves, we can ask for a timeout.

She's asked for 17 so far.....

(exaggerated for comedic effect. It's going really well )

I'm bringing the van back onto the drive for some family time out space, and my step daughters have got themselves code words to indicate their conversations (aka arguments) need to calm down.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Buckle up dudes, it's time for a story. I posted a brief version of this the other day but it lacked depth.

Firstly, I'll admit that for the past few years I have been heartbroken, although the reasons why are a story for another time. it hurt me greatly, and changed me as a person. I was once a young lad filled with hopes and dreams, but this turned me into a bitter miserable bastard. I had a few dates and flings but nothing helped me. It damaged my confidence a lot and eventually I just gave up, thought I should just accept that I'll probably die alone.

 

Then I went to a festival last year. I had intended to go with friends but it sold out before they could get tickets, so I joined a group for folks going solo. Upon arrival, one of the girls in the group came to meet me, to help me with my luggage and finding the campsite. She was fucking gorgeous. We talked and with everything she said, I had more questions, she was fascinating. She seemed like such a lovely girl and even without any alcohol, I was starting to feel butterflies. We hung out together for a few hours and then met the the rest of the group, who were also lovely. We spent the rest of the festival together and honestly it was one of the happiest weeks I've had in a long time.

 

She was really sweet. On the first night we were talking and she said something like "I have social anxiety and I usually have to get drunk and to deal with it. But I feel really comfortable around you, like I could be sobre and still have an amazing time with you". It was heartwarming. We watched the sunset and danced together, it was great. It felt like something was developing between us and for the first time in years... I felt hopeful.

 

The festival ended but we stayed in touch. A few months later I went to see her and we had a really nice time. I didn't want to rush things because that's a mistake I've made in the past, and I thought it would be nicer to just continue as we are and then hopefully something would happen. Let it happen naturally, yknow. We also planned to do more festivals and trips together. Maybe we weren't going to get together, but I still valued her as a friend.

 

But then last week, I was told she has passed away. Twenty three years old. I am devastated. I've wept every day. I try to distract myself but it doesn't work. As soon as I turn everything off and just think, I get consumed by misery. Losing anyone is hard , but to lose someone so young and so beautiful is fucking painful. 

 

I really don't know what to do. I've been having trouble sleeping because I just lay in bed, with that hole in my heart growing, unable to sleep. So I just drink until I fall asleep. I'm trying to find closure but  it's not easy with everything else going on.

 

It hurts :(

Edited by Gilgamesh69
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4 minutes ago, Gilgamesh69 said:

Buckle up dudes, it's time for a story. I posted a brief version of this the other day but it lacked depth.

Firstly, I'll admit that for the past few years I have been heartbroken, although the reasons why are a story for another time. it hurt me greatly, and changed me as a person. I was once a young lad filled with hopes and dreams, but this turned me into a bitter miserable hermit. I had a few dates and flings but none of it helped me. It damaged my confidence a lot and eventually I just gave up, thought I should just accept that I'll probably die alone.

 

Then I went to a festival last year. I had intended to go with friends but it sold out before they could get tickets, so I joined a group for folks going solo. Upon arrival, one of the girls in the group came to meet me, to help me with my luggage and finding the campsite. She was fucking gorgeous. We talked and with everything she said, I had more questions, she was fascinating. She seemed like such a lovely girl and even without any alcohol, I was starting to feel butterflies. We hung out together for a few hours and then met the the rest of the group, who were also lovely. We spent the rest of the festival together and honestly it was one of the happiest weeks I've had in a long time.

 

She was really sweet. On the first night we were talking and she said something like "I have social anxiety and I usually have to get drunk and to deal with it. But I feel really comfortable around you, like I could be sobre and still have an amazing time with you". It was heartwarming. We watched the sunset and danced together, it was great. It felt like something was developing between us and for the first time in years... I felt hopeful.

 

The festival ended but we stayed in touch. A few months later I went to see her and we had a really nice time. I didn't want to rush things because that's a mistake I've made in the past, and I thought it would be nicer to just continue as we are and then hopefully something would happen. Let it happen naturally, yknow. We also planned to do more festivals and trips together. Maybe we weren't going to get together, but I still valued her as a friend.

 

But then last week, I was told she has passed away. Twenty three years old. I am devastated. I've wept every day. I try to distract myself but it doesn't work. As soon as I turn everything off and just think, I get consumed by misery. Losing anyone is hard , but to lose someone so young and so beautiful is fucking painful. 

 

I really don't know what to do. I've been having trouble sleeping because I just lay in bed, with that hole in my heart growing, unable to sleep. So I just drink until I fall asleep. I'm trying to find closure but  it's not easy with everything else going on.

 

It hurts :(

taking small steps is a start ... apart from us here have you talked  this through  with anyone ? friends ? family ? or even her friends and family ? 

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1 hour ago, crazyfool1 said:

taking small steps is a start ... apart from us here have you talked  this through  with anyone ? friends ? family ? or even her friends and family ? 

I don't really want to bother her friends and family as they are mourning right now, and my own friends don't seem to care at all. 

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Just now, Gilgamesh69 said:

I don't really want to bother her friends and family as they are mourning right now, and my own friends don't seem to care at all. 

They are mourning the same as you and I’m sure they will be happy to talk to you if you want to open up to them ... if your friends don’t seem to want to talk to you about it they possibly aren’t seeing what it’s doing to you ... I find when I’m struggling with things I shut myself off From the world and it often takes a little while for things to become clearer for me ... and also for others to realise too .. so it might not be immediately obvious .. Talking is the way out of it .. either friends or strangers ... 

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24 minutes ago, Gilgamesh69 said:

I don't really want to bother her friends and family as they are mourning right now, and my own friends don't seem to care at all. 

Sometimes i find writing things down or visually drawing something helps me make sense of things in my own time at my own pace. Posting on here is positive and a brave first step.

Is there someway you could say goodbye to her in your own way tht means something special to you as a way of closure. 
Take each day one step at a time. 

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13 hours ago, Gilgamesh69 said:

Buckle up dudes, it's time for a story. I posted a brief version of this the other day but it lacked depth.

Firstly, I'll admit that for the past few years I have been heartbroken, although the reasons why are a story for another time. it hurt me greatly, and changed me as a person. I was once a young lad filled with hopes and dreams, but this turned me into a bitter miserable bastard. I had a few dates and flings but nothing helped me. It damaged my confidence a lot and eventually I just gave up, thought I should just accept that I'll probably die alone.

 

Then I went to a festival last year. I had intended to go with friends but it sold out before they could get tickets, so I joined a group for folks going solo. Upon arrival, one of the girls in the group came to meet me, to help me with my luggage and finding the campsite. She was fucking gorgeous. We talked and with everything she said, I had more questions, she was fascinating. She seemed like such a lovely girl and even without any alcohol, I was starting to feel butterflies. We hung out together for a few hours and then met the the rest of the group, who were also lovely. We spent the rest of the festival together and honestly it was one of the happiest weeks I've had in a long time.

 

She was really sweet. On the first night we were talking and she said something like "I have social anxiety and I usually have to get drunk and to deal with it. But I feel really comfortable around you, like I could be sobre and still have an amazing time with you". It was heartwarming. We watched the sunset and danced together, it was great. It felt like something was developing between us and for the first time in years... I felt hopeful.

 

The festival ended but we stayed in touch. A few months later I went to see her and we had a really nice time. I didn't want to rush things because that's a mistake I've made in the past, and I thought it would be nicer to just continue as we are and then hopefully something would happen. Let it happen naturally, yknow. We also planned to do more festivals and trips together. Maybe we weren't going to get together, but I still valued her as a friend.

 

But then last week, I was told she has passed away. Twenty three years old. I am devastated. I've wept every day. I try to distract myself but it doesn't work. As soon as I turn everything off and just think, I get consumed by misery. Losing anyone is hard , but to lose someone so young and so beautiful is fucking painful. 

 

I really don't know what to do. I've been having trouble sleeping because I just lay in bed, with that hole in my heart growing, unable to sleep. So I just drink until I fall asleep. I'm trying to find closure but  it's not easy with everything else going on.

 

It hurts :(

I'm so so sorry :( lots of love to you

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17 hours ago, Gilgamesh69 said:

Buckle up dudes, it's time for a story. I posted a brief version of this the other day but it lacked depth.

Firstly, I'll admit that for the past few years I have been heartbroken, although the reasons why are a story for another time. it hurt me greatly, and changed me as a person. I was once a young lad filled with hopes and dreams, but this turned me into a bitter miserable bastard. I had a few dates and flings but nothing helped me. It damaged my confidence a lot and eventually I just gave up, thought I should just accept that I'll probably die alone.

 

Then I went to a festival last year. I had intended to go with friends but it sold out before they could get tickets, so I joined a group for folks going solo. Upon arrival, one of the girls in the group came to meet me, to help me with my luggage and finding the campsite. She was fucking gorgeous. We talked and with everything she said, I had more questions, she was fascinating. She seemed like such a lovely girl and even without any alcohol, I was starting to feel butterflies. We hung out together for a few hours and then met the the rest of the group, who were also lovely. We spent the rest of the festival together and honestly it was one of the happiest weeks I've had in a long time.

 

She was really sweet. On the first night we were talking and she said something like "I have social anxiety and I usually have to get drunk and to deal with it. But I feel really comfortable around you, like I could be sobre and still have an amazing time with you". It was heartwarming. We watched the sunset and danced together, it was great. It felt like something was developing between us and for the first time in years... I felt hopeful.

 

The festival ended but we stayed in touch. A few months later I went to see her and we had a really nice time. I didn't want to rush things because that's a mistake I've made in the past, and I thought it would be nicer to just continue as we are and then hopefully something would happen. Let it happen naturally, yknow. We also planned to do more festivals and trips together. Maybe we weren't going to get together, but I still valued her as a friend.

 

But then last week, I was told she has passed away. Twenty three years old. I am devastated. I've wept every day. I try to distract myself but it doesn't work. As soon as I turn everything off and just think, I get consumed by misery. Losing anyone is hard , but to lose someone so young and so beautiful is fucking painful. 

 

I really don't know what to do. I've been having trouble sleeping because I just lay in bed, with that hole in my heart growing, unable to sleep. So I just drink until I fall asleep. I'm trying to find closure but  it's not easy with everything else going on.

 

It hurts :(

Big hug to you. You don't have to do anything, just get through the day. Now is not a good time to be able to do things, with the lockdown but talking can help. Talk here, or do you have anyone to talk with face to face? Allow yourself to do nothing if that's what you feel like, there's no rush to feeling better, the ability to handle your grief only comes in time. That sounds clichéd, but it worked for me and grief becomes more manageable.

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@Gilgamesh69 that's horrible pal. First and foremost, condolences. Losing someone at any time is shit, but with current situation and your story that sounds really compounded.

I'm not going to lie, I don't think I really have anything constructive to give you. The best thing I can say is that venting things anywhere is better than keeping it in.  If you've not got anywhere else to go, keep venting here. When you get past conversations about Foals and whether or not Corbyn is an idiot, there's some lovely people on here.

The other option, which sounds a bit dramatic, is something like the Samaritans.  As good as chatting on here can be, sometimes an actual voice and conversation is what's needed.

Hugs dude.

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Hey, thanks for the support everyone x

Unfortunately I live alone, and don't really know anybody nearby that I could go for a walk and talk with. My "close" friends and family know I've lost someone but other than offering condolences, they haven't really tried to help out. Have tried to express that I'm hurt by the loss but they've just ignored it. Bastards.

From reading between the lines; I think she took her own life. That makes it worse because now I've got all these thoughts telling me I should have reached out to her, should have talked to her more. Obviously from a logical perspective I know that it's not my fault, but that doesn't stop me thinking that way.

I spoke to a mutual friend yesterday, her best friend. I've donated some money to help with funeral costs and to return her home. That helped me a little bit. She said I should come visit her resting place someday. It's a remote village in the Arctic circle so will be quite difficult to get to, but I will do it. 

 

 

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@Gilgamesh69 someone I work with just after recently  took their own life ... and my boss was sharing those very same thoughts ... not knowing how bad it had really become but trying to be there to support through difficult times .... the guys partner came into work after the funeral to thank my boss for the time he had spent with him and to reasure him there was nothing he could have done . Im sure you were there for her just the same . I still dont believe your close friends know the impact this is having on you ... keep chatting x 

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