overheard and made you laugh....

[.jay.]

also about 4am on the way back from trash city a friend of mine catching up to us as I'm camping it up having my photo taken with some firemen he was totally oblivious of the faux homosexual based tomfoolery and asking the firemen "do you have anything warm for me" and all of us including the firemen falling about laughing.

also the same night my friend telling me he doesn't like it when people wink at him and me turning to this girl and saying "excuse me love can you wink at my friend here he has a weird thing about it" and hr replying "i would love to but i can't wink" and another friend asking her to prove it and her doing this odd blink/grimace at which point he stops her and says "you're right darling you can't wink you just look like an angry pirate" i was still laughing about that 2 days later!

Edited June 30, 2009 by .jay.

[MieleBee]

Womans voice coming from a tent near our little camp

"That lady gaga, She is a transvestite isn't she?" Everyone within ear shot shout back "YES!"

[Mooglemeg]

overheard two girls say to each other 'if you get lost meet me at the corner where i did that burp last year'

must have been a memorable burp

[alibear]

Already posted elsewhere but here it is again...

Thursday night. While back at our tent stocking up on our booze, the young scamps camping next to us (who were all sound, really) were there too. One came out of his tent and another said to him, 'oi, mate, Michael Jackson's died.' He immediately replied with 'What? I just come out of a K-hole and you tell me that?!' Maybe you had to be there, but it was too funny...

[raw-edge]

I was walking past the Orange chill and charge tent I think it was saturday morning of to get some early grub from one of the vans along towards Jazz World, anyway...

As i was walking along there were 3 guys chatting and clearly dropped into the last bit of their conversation whcih was, who would win out of an Anaconda and a Lion, there was discussion about wether the snake would be able to crush the Lion without geting bitten etc before one of them piped up with something along the lines of

" hang on you said "In the Jungle" Lions don't live in the jungle they are on the Savannahs so this is pointless"

[Filthy]

"I hope Rolf dedicates 2 Little Boys to Michael Jackson"

[elfimaju]

overheard two girls say to each other 'if you get lost meet me at the corner where i did that burp last year'

must have been a memorable burp

[biki]

I heard this conversation between a couple just after Phil Daniels had come on to do parklife with blur-

Bloke: That must be the most famous thing that that bloke will ever be known for

Girl: No, he's an actor too!

Bloke: Oh really?

Girl: Yeah he was in Eastenders

Bloke: Oh, he's not a proper actor then!!

I'm guessing they've never seen Quadrophenia!!

[tijuana_man]

overheard two girls say to each other 'if you get lost meet me at the corner where i did that burp last year'

[grant5]

three things.

first was during bruce springsteen, when bruce had his gospel moment

Bruce: "we can build a house tonight"

guy beside us, without missing a beat: "i hope he has got planning permission"

second after bruce, two guys from leeds talking about that same speech

"shut up bruce, f**king take it home"

thirdly and finally, the great tom jones, along the lines of ...

Tom Jones: "can everybody hear it alright?"

Crowd: "YES"

Tom Jones: "someone tell the sound guy to turn it up, they cant hear it"

[Donnababycatcher]

me and my daughter walking through crowd with 6ft inflatable penis when a girl about 9 asked her parents what it was, they pretended not to hear her and carried on talking she asked again and they said it was a balloon oh she said I thought it was a cock....

I laughed so hard I nearly wet myself

[greenfairy43]

The funniest thing I heard this year was at the Cider Bus, when the owner or a reputed festival website told me, nay insisted that U2 were the Special Guests lined up for one of the Park Stage gigs.

[BobCarolgees]

thirdly and finally, the great tom jones, along the lines of ...

Tom Jones: "can everybody hear it alright?"

Crowd: "YES"

Tom Jones: "someone tell the sound guy to turn it up, they cant hear it"

[Phil-itfc]

I was walking past the pryamid and this couple were having a conversation walking the other way the girl said to her fella,

'he's on this gay porn site called speedo boys'

[sammysundae]

these are great. but i can usually add way more to them. i must not have been drunk enough

[Glitter+Vodka]

these are great. but i can usually add way more to them. i must not have been drunk enough

[Neeeeeedles]

2 things i found truly hilarious

1) A fella dressed as jesus was trying to get through the crowds down at the bottom of Pennards Hill, he coughed loudly so everyone could hear and did the moses action where parted the waves but as if to part the crowd. They parted and as he walked through the middle he said '2000 years and i still got it'

2) Naked fella walking along the muddy road where the cars and that come and leads you to trash city etc. Yeah walking along and stops in front of a truck full of people so they come to a halt and says ' Stop! Naked Police'

Never laughed so hard in my life for either of them moments

[BlackHole2006]

"Glastonbury isn't as good as it used to be"

[Laura_Babs]

me and my daughter walking through crowd with 6ft inflatable penis when a girl about 9 asked her parents what it was, they pretended not to hear her and carried on talking she asked again and they said it was a balloon oh she said I thought it was a cock....

I laughed so hard I nearly wet myself

[Mishy]

Walking back to the tent late on saturday night, a woman said to one of the campsite crew "I can't find my tent" ......"It's near a big tree"

We were laughing so hard for about 10 minutes, then realised she was walking behind us and felt really bad.

I hope she found her tent.

[Crackfox]

A little off his tits kevin and perry lookalike comes sprinting up to me while i'm waiting to use a portaloo. Taps me on the shoulder and looks like his world has fallen in, "mate, have you heard the news. Michael Barrymore's dead". I'd have pissed myself laughing if i didn't need a dump as well.

[liverlou]

On Thursday evening:

Girl 1: Oh my god Michael Jackson is dead!

Girl 2: Oh well, at least it's not Lilly Allen...

[Joshuwarr]

Did anyone see the guy who fell over at the Brothers Bar on Thursday (I think)? He became really agressive pushing this girl with him about and throwing stuff. It looked like he was about to cry and wasnt getting up. Wasnt funny but I just remembered it :/

[hendoflex]

Two for me were:

1) During Madness "Wings of a Dove", my friend said to my girlfriend, "How does a Dove fly?", my gf replied "Doves don't fly." My friend burst out laughing saying "they did," to which my gf replied, "Oh yeah. I was thinking of pigeons."

2) During Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds, the same friend said to my gf, "The drummer looks like Geoff Bilbog." Gf asked, "Who's Geoff Bilbog? Are you thinking of Bob Geldof?"

You can't make that up.

[VCK]

Before Springsteen, I can't remember what they were talking about but some pissed up guy went in his mate's face and said "I'll be fuming! Fuming be I'll! Be I'll fuming!"