Mr.Tease
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Posts posted by Mr.Tease
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1 hour ago, stuartbert two hats said:
I always read these thread and think "naaah, I'll keep going forever", but I really need a rethink this time. I've missed Sunday headliners before, but it's always been due to overindulgence. This year it was down to downright mild indulgence on the Friday night. I was just knackered. Not super hungover or anything like that, just tired. It was good, obviously it was good, it was Glastonbury, but I can't help thinking that keeping on doing what I've been doing for the last 25 years didn't work this time.
Probably a wake up call to really double down on my personal fitness, either that or drop shit loads of money to not actually camp in the festival, and I'm way, way keener on the first.
I've had to listen to my body the last year or so and alter my fitness and food habits- after the initial resistance, it's not so bad- some changes I feel a bit better for and I do feel physically fitter than I think I ever have been (it is a low bar)- though tiredness (sleepy more than physical) is very challenging to overcome- think I just have to accept I need more sleep and am more susceptible to 'power naps' than I used to be! When I first started going my amount of sleep per night halved each day I was there until it was down to nothing- unimaginable now!😂
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1 hour ago, jannybruck said:
I think with this sort of thing it's a case of "when you know, you know".
I skipped out this year and honestly had an amazing time watching it on iPlayer with some friends. It's OK to not go – or want to go – every single year.
Yeah, this is the first year I didn't go since 2003- wasn't ready physically (due to a recent op), or mentally (still processing the past two years with a ll the covid, death, loss and change). I'd been dreading not going for years, but it wasn't as bad as anticipated- had more pangs of wanting to be there rather than a burning desire. I think I had it my brain that if I didn't go once, then I would never allow myself to return for some reason! Which is daft when you think about it😂 It is alright to not go and see how that feels, it doesn't mean you're banned for life
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44 minutes ago, steviewevie said:
My daughter is struggling with some of the crowds. We might have to leave early.
Must be hard for her (and you worrying about her), especially after the past two years of social distancing/lockdowns etc. If she/ you need crowd detox, like Megatonicmeatwagon said there are quiet areas- the hill above the tipi's is usually deserted and you can go to strummerville, the peace garden by the stone circle, plus all the green fields and Toad hall etc from there, that's usually where I hang about if the crowds are getting to me.
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4 minutes ago, barcelonista1899 said:
Crowded House on the TV the crowd looked tiny.. crowd was broken up/empty past the sound desk.
I'm not there but my two cents are:
- Security/ stewards- if it's the same as last year there is still a big shortage after the pandemic, not to mention staff dropping out last minute with COVID. Was certainly the case last year.
- Weak lineups and the shift to mainstream. I.e. Sugababes and TLC in previous years may have been considered 'novelty' acts which, if up against other strong acts maybe wouldn't have attracted larger crowds? Pyramid stage was piss poor yesterday.
- I think after so long maybe people just aren't used to big crowds and don't remember what it was like previously? Queues have been insane for places for years at night... Maybe we're all just remembering things differently?
I think this plays a role- crowds are the first thing I forget- nearly all my memories of Glastonbury I seem to 'forget' there were loads of other people about- it's only when I go back and look at the photos, everything looks rammed- in my mind it was just me pottering about with a smattering of other people!
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9 minutes ago, Kalopsia said:
I've changed my plans to avoid acts I'm concerned about, Calvin Harris, Olivia Rodrigo, it's really a shame.
I'm not there this year, but I remember doing something similar in 2019, which I thought seemed more crowded than the previous few years, especially on the Thursday- decided then there's no point in planning/trying to see anything on a Thursday in future, and instead would just potter about in quieter places. So it's not necessarily new.
Maybe everyone's (punters and stewards) a bit rusty too and not used to crowds and how to behave/act in large crowds due to the past 2 years of lockdowns and social distancing etc?
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1 hour ago, Glasto Weatherwatch said:
12z update (puts @briddjmask on)....
Thursday:
Late pm showers showing up in this run. Given we know they're going to be very localised, have to cross fingers. Pretty warm, 25 degrees or so.
Friday:
Same as last run, possibly slightly better. Light showers around, good chance of no rainfall during daytime, patches are skirting the site. Clears into evening for headliners. 19/20 degrees, so bit cooler. Dry overnight.
Saturday:
Light rain nearby but dry for the day and overnight. Cooler again, 17/18 degrees. Yellow Hey Jude warning in place from 11pm - 2am.
Sunday:
Dry as a bone. 18 degrees or so.
Monday:
Post-Glastonbury existential dread.
That's the 12z!
Remember in 2004 when this man (Paul McCartney not glastoweather watch)claimed he'd hired a special cloud busting plane to stop the rain- I think I believed him at the time 😂
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15 hours ago, Quark said:
NBJ fritters....you bloody tosser 😂
That cookbook they released a few years ago tells you how to make them- pretty simple too, you can indulge your addiction all year round now!
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5 minutes ago, FuzzyDunlop said:
Mud
Sometimes bits of water would fall from the sky
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I used to like those marathon jamming sessions in some of the tents/cafe things. Think the Banyan Tree used to have 24hr ones ongoing throughout the festival (wasn't hat their undoing? They breached the license times for live music or something?), where people and acts could join in or take over the different instruments and some people were just amazing- seem to remember a jam leading into some Pink Floyd covers or some tribute band or something in 2003 in the early hours of the morning- it was great.
Seem to remember stumbling upon something similar between the market and the circus fields back in 2007 maybe. Though I think they had something similar as a tribute in the Greenfields a few years ago too.
I could never work out whether the music was really great (or even if they were even ongoing jam sessions) or whether it was just because I was high (maybe both!)- but it seemed like mind-blowing stuff at the time! Real or imagined, used to be one of my favourite bits!
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15 minutes ago, Watergirl said:
Haven't read the whole thread, so probably this has been mentioned. Rumours from the outside world trickling in that someone has died (Tony Blair, Cliff Richard etc.). Mobile phones ended that.
Mind you, I was late getting a mobile, so when word went around that Michael Jackson had died while the festival was on, I thought it was a hoax...
Me and my friend did too- we heard the rumour, dismissed it as a hoax and then when all the stalls started playing Michael Jackson music immediately afterwards we said to each other "what a weird coincidence!"- the penny did not drop!😂
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On 5/28/2021 at 10:50 AM, CaledonianGonzo said:
Tell Tale Signs is a good sampler of the era - including one of the best songs he's ever written:
Agreed! Tell Tale Signs is great, filled with loads of great stuff- inspired me to sift through the bootlegs series after initially thinking I'd just work through his studio albums
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Just finished working my way through most of his stuff (began during one of the lockdowns!) after not really liking him that much (I am now ready to repent!)- time well spent!
Aside from the ones already mentioned on this thread, I like these lesser known ones too:
and
I'm a bit worried as the other two things I got not were John Prine, who then perished and Nanci Griffith who also then perished soon after! Anyways, I like the latter's Bob Dylan cover a lot:
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On 3/30/2022 at 11:01 AM, CY 2019 said:
I'm going solo this year.
Has anyone done this before and how did you find it?
Do the good folk of efestivals arrange any meets for this?
I went solo for the first time in 2019- overall very enjoyable! I like my own company and am used to travelling by myself (though am also an anxious chap too!), so that helped, but it was something I always wanted to try and I'm very glad I did (especially since it turned out to be the last one before covid hit!)
Trickiest part for me was the Wednesday, mainly because there's a lot of people meeting up with friends who they haven't seen for a while, and that was one of the things I liked most about the Wednesdays in the past- plus with not too much on, I felt a bit self conscious from early evening until the sun set when people were settling down! But it did give me chance to potter about and reminisce, and sit in the shade as it was hot! Just took a little while to adjust to. Plus you don't have the stress of worrying if there will be enough space for your friends to pitch their tent next to yours or waiting for them to arrive for hours on end.
I can never remember what I do on the Thursday or what it was like!
Once all the main music and stuff got going Friday through Sunday, it was easy-peasy and a lot of fun- freedom to just do whatever you want without having to faff about meeting up with people (though, to be honest I mainly do my own thing even when going with other people, so it wasn't too much different!) Yeah, it's a bit of shame you can't meet up with your friends at night and share what you've done and hang out, but it does give you more time to explore and immerse yourself- it was a definitely worthwhile experience for me.
So yes, apart from the early evening Wednesday hump, I did like it and it turned out to be one of my favourite years. It sounds daft, but I didn't realise before hand that after the Wednesday people aren't really joined at the hip and most people are too-ing and fro-ing between things by themselves, or are sat about waiting for people by themselves or with just one person, so you don't feel as self-conscious and it's a lot easier to talk to people too if you want to.
And like others have said you can join solo camps if you'd like to know some people back at your tent. I didn't (I was quite content camping by myself as I only really go back to my tent for supplies/ changing clothes/ power nap, and it's usually deserted!), but got lucky with some nice tent neighbours so if I wanted to I could chat to them about what I'd been up to.
If you do find yourself getting self-conscious, there are quiter areas to sit or relax- whether it be the woods or the edges of the hills over looking the site, or Strummersville, or the Greenfield's or circus fields etc.
Can't go this year unfortunately as I'm awaiting an operation (would have been happy to go by myself again otherwise), but I do hope you enjoy yourself and have the kind of festival you'd like to have
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1 minute ago, Zoo Music Girl said:
Thank you. That is all really helpful. Oddly I do feel that having a bad experience better equips me for trying again as I have a bit of info to go in with now. More directive and active is the way to go for me I think. And I think I'd be inclined to try a couple before just jumping into something with the first one I saw.
It's really interesting to hear about a counsellor's experience of counselling as well, so cheers for that.
I have a fair bit of experience of online dating and that did work for me in the end so I guess that's a useful analogy to keep in mind!
You're welcome!
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8 hours ago, carlosj said:
That sounds so bad of her, and that she and/or her form of therapy wasn't for you. I've started looking on this site, but not yet reached out to anyone on it. Is this any good for you?
https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/I'm fearful of what it will unlock, I think. My work's scheme were good, in that they thought I have PTSD and didn't offer sessions since they were limited to 6 and didn't want to abandon me partway through.
Anyone else have suggestions on finding a therapist?
This is one of the things that drives me berserk- sometimes you go to the NHS or work schemes and they say you're suffering from something that's a bit more complex and longer term, and they can't tackle it because they can't offer enough sessions. But then there's no where they can refer you to because no where offers the number of sessions you need. So essentially people who need more get less, until they reach crisis point at which point then they have an overstretched crisis service. But I don't get the logic or basic health care in having nothing between short term support and just leaving people with greater need to fend for themselves until they get significantly worse.
You're right, that's one of the main listing sites (I've put the other one in the reply to zoogirl as well as some things that I found helpful when trying to find a therapist myself). To be honest, people can give lots of tips, but what most people do is they go on the basis of the photo's in the profile and gravitate to one or two, and then they try a session with them and get a feel for whether they're the right person for them- that's just as good a method as any!
Some people find the therapist/person/relationship is the key thing, for others it's the type of therapy that's most important- there's no right or wrong, it's just what resonates with you.
You might also feel now is not the right time, or that you don't feel in a safe enough place to go opening things up- there's no shame in that at all.
The good thing about that website is you can also search for definitions about what the different types of therapy are and it will explain them for you (or you can just ask the counsellor). If one sounds like a better fit/ more intriguing, then you can use an advance search to just show the profiles that offer that.
So the main types are CBT (Cognitive behavioural Therapy), Person-centred (or humanistic) and psychodynamic (or psychoanalytic- this is the type you tend to find in tv shows!). Integrative is a mix of the different types. With trauma and PTSD another one is called EMDR, which again you can see that site for an explanation of. Then there's more creative stuff like art therapy or horse/equine assisted therapy if you like horses! there's lots of choice. Here's the comprehensive list of the different types:
https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/counselling.html
I'll cut and paste the main definitions:
Cognitive and behavioural therapies
Behavioural therapies are based on the way you think (cognitive) and/or the way you behave. These therapies recognise that it is possible to change, or recondition, our thoughts or behaviour to overcome specific problems.
Humanistic therapies
Humanistic therapies focus on self-development, growth and responsibilities. They seek to help individuals recognise their strengths, creativity and choice in the 'here and now'.
Psychoanalytical and psychodynamic therapies
Psychoanalytical and psychodynamic therapies are based on an individual's unconscious thoughts and perceptions that have developed throughout their childhood, and how these affect their current behaviour and thoughts.
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9 hours ago, Zoo Music Girl said:
Thank you so much for your kind words. Not seen you here for a bit but I always liked your contributions to the shit thread!
To be fair to my therapist, she did kind of leave it up to me but she strongly suggested she didn't think it was helping and said to email her and let her know if I wanted to come back or not the next week. Which felt like a rejection to me and I didn't think I could go back after that. I actually cried all the way home from that session so it didn't do me any favours at all! I don't think she dealt with it very well and to be honest I think she just got a bit bored with me. I emailed her the next day and she didn't reply until three days later! Which seemed really shoddy. I asked for a referral and she just said to look on the NHS, which seemed pretty lazy, especially since she knows I am willing to pay privately.
The whole thing was pretty weird. Friends who are having or have had therapy did it for much longer but my therapist seemed to think we'd covered pretty much everything and I should be feeling better by now, whereas I still thought we were relatively early in the process.
As a counsellor would you recommend any particular resources for finding a good one in future or is it just hit and miss? She was listed on BACP and another directory whose name escapes me. But yeah probably just not a good fit - wish I'd realised that sooner but I'd thought that any qualms I had about it were things I needed to push through rather than a sign it wasn't right for me. The annoying thing is its taken me years to get the courage to go and I've found the whole thing really challenging so this has set me back somewhat.
Anyway, waffling! Hope all good your end.
What an odd and rather crap counsellor you had! It's not what you need at the best of times, but when you're struggling it can really hurt, no wonder you cried all the way home. I don't know what they were thinking (if at all) that 12 sessions should be enough, and they should have had a basic professional (as well as basic human) awareness that when someones experienced bereavements, then you really need to handle the ending of the counselling really sensitive otherwise it can tap into feelings of abandonment, feeling dropped, all kinds of stuff really. Plus, who wants to come out a counselling session having felt dumped?!
Though as an anxious person, I am quick to assume people are looking at me like I'm an unwelcome development, or critically in some way (and I genuinely have no idea whether they are or aren't!), which is what I find most difficult when I'm having counselling myself! I guess we'll never know with this therapist what was actually going on their side of things, but they certainly left you feeling worse off and they didn't clock it or have the sensitivity or take the time to check what was going on or what it was like for you.
You and Carlosj are one step ahead of me- the main listings for private counsellors are indeed:
https://www.bacp.co.uk/search/Therapists
(that one lists them in some sort of order relating to the centrally pegged google location to the area searched for )
and
https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk
(that one lists them in a randomly generated order, apart from the first three who pay extra for preferential listing)
I wish I had some good advice for finding the right counsellor, it's something I've always struggled with myself! If it helps, once I'd had a bad experience and realised that it wasn't my fault and that it wasn't because I'm a bad client or because I was 'doing it wrong', then I was able to use that to help me find a better counsellor.
So usually they'll offer a free consultation and so in that I'd tell the prospective new counsellor why my last experience was bad, and then that was useful because I could use their response to see if they understood/were empathic/got me and it also helps them out because they then know what's not helpful for you and what to not do! Sometimes it's worth having a consultation with a few and getting a feel for which is the best for you. Unfortunately there are some real stinkers out there's nd there are some bad fits, but there are also some good ones and some good fits too.
Also, I think I felt a bit less intimidated by counsellors when I thought of it as instead of being "how are they going to make me better", to "how am I going to use them to help me get better", as it gives you bit more agency and makes the relationship a bit more collaborative and equal.
Some of the things to consider/ look out for is what kind of qualities you find helpful or not- do you want them to be more directive, or more trusting of your judgement with you taking more of a lead? Do you want them to be more passive (so they basically give you plenty of space to talk while they listen) or more active (so they'll engage more with what you're saying). I like my counsellors to be funny/ self depreciating and have a history of anxiety themselves, as I feel more comfortable with that type of person. Others prefer more 'professional'/aloof/ serious. It's all personal preference really! Also helps if you have an idea of what you don't like (for me I hate it when they never entertain the possibility that they might be wrong or assume that they know best), as again you can share this in the consultation session and find out if that's how they are/work.
I do hope once you've recovered from your bad experience and feel ready to try again (if you decide you actually do want to try again!), I do hope you have better luck- I guess it's a bit like how I imagine online dating is really!
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11 hours ago, Zoo Music Girl said:
Would absolutely echo this. I ran out of up votes really quickly, but was delighted to see this thread back again.
Talking about these things is definitely good. I feel very lucky that I can talk to my other half about pretty much everything, but also there can come a point where you need something external to that or you can't just rely on them so heavily all the time. I'm very grateful to have him, though, this last year maybe more than ever.
I'm struggling with anxiety that comes and goes - it can be debilitating but then I feel totally normal and happy so it's hard to see it as a constant problem I need to medicate for. I'm not completely against meds and they have been recommended to me by others but I don't yet think I'm in a place I need them all the time. I'm trying to stay open to it though.
As others have said, plenty of people do really well on them. Some of the closest people to me in my life take citalopram and sertraline respectively and report nothing but good things so it can definitely work. If you try them and it's not for you then there's nothing lost - just make sure to come off them safely.
I've had a shitter of a few years, starting with my best friend's death from cancer, then my partner's dad being diagnosed with cancer, then another of my best friends who is still with us and in constant treatment. Then my mum died last summer. This is all on top of some existing anxiety and the pandemic and has left me feeling unable to cope at times, but part of me thinks its understandable to react this way to these difficult things. The trick for me is finding ways to cope.
Pre pandemic I relied on stuff like Glastonbury, gigs and holidays to get me through. I'd always be looking for the next fun thing to get me through. It's not that sustainable though and the last couple of years have forced me to look for simple pleasures and find happiness in the day to day. Not always easy and I'm lucky to live with a great partner who helps me, which of course not everyone has.
Exercise definitely helps. Have kept up that habit for best part of 15 years now. Can be hard to motivate yourself if you're new to it but when you find something you like and make it a habit it helps so much. No matter how shit I feel, yoga, spin or even just a walk tends to clear the cobwebs at least a little. Appreciate how hard that can be for some, though.
I started seeing a psychotherapist weekly at the end of December. I wasn't 100% sure it was helping but I was hopeful that the act of talking would benefit me. I'm sure if did to some extent. However, at the end of my 12th session, she basically said she didn't think it was helping me and suggested I see a GP or look for CBT on the NHS. Really fucked me up being dropped quite abruptly. But she seemed to think churning up everything that had upset me was not helping me and that might be the case. The problem is it's all at the surface now and I've kind of been left with it!
Am taking a break from therapy but going to try to find someone more directive who does CBT or even ACT. I'm able to pay privately so will be doing that rather than clogging up the NHS waiting lists for people who need care more urgently than me.
I'm disappointed it didn't help when I have friends who speak so highly of therapy. I'm not sure if maybe it was a case of wrong therapy or wrong therapist or maybe I wasn't opening up enough. Still not sure. I do know plenty of people say it takes a while to find the right one so hoping it's just that but the fact I stayed for 12 weeks makes me think I'm not a great judge of what I need! If I see another one I will lead with this experience I think.
Another thing that can help is having a creative outlet. Am trying to get back into writing as that was always my thing when younger but again getting the motivation and making the time is hard.
Sending love to you all.
Sounds like life has really walloped you the last few years, and you had a bit of a stinker of an experience with your therapist- at the very least they should have actually asked you if you felt like it was helping or leaving you feeling worse rather than suddenly and arbitrarily deciding for you, and if you’d decided it was being detrimental then they should have at the very least worked with you to end safely and helped while you got something else in place, rather than dump you! It’s like they stopped an operation half way into it!
It’s hard to feel safe in a world when so many painful things have happened to you and the people you love, and life’s unrecognisable from what it used to be. I think when people you love die, you don’t just lose them, but also the way life used to be- everything just feels off and worse. No wonder you’re struggling with anxiety, and in turn no wonder you lose trust in yourself and your ability to cope- it’s scary and a tough double whammy!
At the same time it sounds like you are a really judge of what you need (and especially what you don’t need and what isn’t helpful!), you might not be able to define it at the moment, but you’ll know what it is when you find it and in the meantime it sounds like you’re feeling your way through the different options- it’s like divining for water! (though it’s hard to not lose hope when it’s proving to be elusive).
As a counsellor myself, I’ve had some terrible counsellors and some not particularly helpful ones but also some good ones- nothing earth shattering though! But I have a better idea now of the type of person I do and don’t want as a therapist now.
I think you’re right though, sometimes you end up with the wrong therapist for you, sometimes it’s the wrong kind of therapy, sometimes it’s not talking therapy that you need, and sometimes I think luck or timing comes into it. It’s hard to heal from a gunshot wound while you’re still being shot- sometimes you need life to stop dumping on you and give you break, it’s unreal when horrible things just keep happening.
I do hope everyone on this thread finds the kind of help they need- when you’re stuck in the midst of it, it’s hard to see out of it, and it’s hard not to detach from people and things to protect yourself from the pain. I always think of Gil Scott Heron when he was talking about his drug addiction- to paraphrase him, when it comes to life, sometimes you feel on top of it and then sometimes it just kicks your ass
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12 hours ago, steviewevie said:
definitely something going on with Gove. Hardly see or hear from him anymore, maybe he's just doing stuff behind the scenes and keeping away from the media? I wonder how long he'll stay in politics.
Suspect a combination of substance misuse issues (allegedly) and splitting from his wife after cheating on her (allegedly). There was speculation that the Media have been shielding him (they knew about the affair and split for ages) because he’s a mate of murdoch (why the Times and sun didn’t run with it) and his wife is a Mail columnist, and the Telegraph are fans of his. Nice healthy democracy we live in with a nice healthy press system.
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33 minutes ago, Ozanne said:
One rule for them and another for us.
Barnard castle Part 2, both in terms of shamelessness and the fact it will likely critically undermine compliance with the self-isolating thing.
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On 6/27/2021 at 4:45 AM, kalifire said:
Lauryn Hill. The danger signs were there from various videos of prior sets online, but Miseducation was so seminal, and an appearance so rare, I think many of us felt duty bound to be there and hope for the best. Unfortunately we all lost that bet. Firstly, she was late. Second, much of her valuable time was used by a DJ playing ‘warm up’ tunes (for what purpose? You don’t need to hype us up, it’s fucking Glastonbury!). When she eventually appeared, yet again her perfectionism spoilt what could have been a wonderful Glasto moment. She seemed consistently annoyed with the sound, gesticulating wildly to sound crews and her production team, at one stage even stopping proceedings between songs and visibly laying into someone verbally, side of stage. We just wanted the hits and a singalong, but Ms Hill didn’t seem to want to be reduced to that, betraying a huge disconnect between the artist and crowd; the kind that kills sets. Killing Me Softly was dutifully trotted out as a kind of token last-song offering but it was too late. Many of us were disappointed, regretting our decision to sacrifice The Comet is Coming at West Holts for this.
Ah, I'd lost track of the time and didn't realise she was late and couldn't see the screen so wasn't bothered by her coms to the production staff. Music and singing seemed fine and folks were dancing where I was at
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On 6/27/2021 at 10:36 AM, waltere said:
Got to agree with the Lauryn Hill mentions.
In the immortal words of someone on this forum shortly after that festival "I didn't realise Miss Lauryn Hill was an instruction".
I'm not the biggest lauryn hill fan, but I thought her performance was fine-didn't really get all the hate! What was the issue with her? I'd read all sorts of horror stories about her sets on the lead up, but thought she was okay on the day, not sure what people were expecting?
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Paul Simon on the Pyramid 2011, just so boring! Does anyone remember anything about it apart from all the chairs you had to navigate to get anywhere near the stage and the bit where he did 'call be Al' at the end?
Garfunkel on acoustic a few years later was better despite his voice being shot to shit!
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15 hours ago, stuartbert two hats said:
After seeing all the old clips, it really brings home quite how spectacular that Coldplay production was for Live at Worthy. At least twice as elaborate as your average headliner.
They really do raise the bar for visuals every time they enter that field.
Compare their pyramid performance in 2005 when essentially they just had a light bulb he swung round and a Casio style digital watch display, and it’s ridiculous how much they upped the ante. I don’t like their music, but I do think they’ve done some of the nicest light displays their last few headlining performances
Hands up if you caught Covid there?
in Chat
Posted
Wish we could go back in time and tell us that 2 years ago before we wasted all that time engaging with that infamous covid thread!😂