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  1. 69 points
    Caitlin Moran and Emily Eavis, 40, at Worthy Farm last monthTOM JACKSON The Times, June 14 2019, 5:00pm Share Save Glastonbury, 2017 Sunday afternoon. Barry Gibb – legendary frontman of the Bee Gees – launches into Stayin’ Alive under a blue sky. There are 175,000 people on site, and a good half of them are here – going absolutely crackers to one of the greatest songs ever recorded. The audience aren’t the only ones, for, as Gibb plays the opening chords, the entire front-of-stage security detachment – all in their blue “Specialized Security” T-shirts – form a line and break into a surprise, synchronised dance routine. Really, you don’t know what the phrase “unlikely joy” means until you’ve seen 50 burly Glaswegian security guards hip-thrusting to the falsetto screaming of, “I’m a woman’s man, no time to talk.” Halfway through the song, an audience member – wearing an amusingly huge set of Gibb-honouring false teeth – throws a sparkly gold jacket onto the stage. There’s an anxious moment – Gibb is always on a trigger-alert for people mocking the Bee Gees’ disco-era image, as those who saw him walk out of an interview with Clive Anderson in 1996 will know. But Gibb, on seeing the jacket, puts it on delightedly, busts a funky dance move, and the crowd erupts. The sunshine on the sequins makes him look like a 72-year-old glitterball, as befits his slot: “Glastonbury legend”. Beyoncé, 2011PA Gibb is playing on the last day of the biggest festival on Earth, with 2,800 performers over 120 stages, with a combined audience of 28 million watching at home, on the BBC. Over the previous five days, Gibb has been preceded by Katy Perry in a silver body-stocking throwing herself into the audience and crowd-surfing; Stormzy in a “We Heart Grenfell” T-shirt prompting Glastonbury’s biggest ever mosh pit; Jeremy Corbyn blinking, startled, as a whole field chant, “Oh! Jeremy Corbyn!” at him, and Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga appearing on the Pyramid Stage to record a pivotal scene for the forthcoming A Star Is Born. It’s been a year of iconic moments. But, elsewhere, Glastonbury is going about its extraordinary business as usual: over in Arcadia, a 40ft high spider belches flame into the air. The NYC Downlow gay disco operates in full-scale, film-set replica of a ruined Seventies Lower East Side tenement. The Unfairground sports a crashed East German plane. There’s a secret underground piano bar; a pirate ship; saunas; whittling workshops; Power Ballad yoga; 30 bars; 3,300 toilets – 1,300 of them fully compostable; 250 food stalls/cafés, and 175,000 unique experiences happening in tents, yurts, camper vans and around campfires. This is a rural factory of memory-making – if you have attended Glastonbury, chances are at least one thing that has happened here will be in the Best Bits montage that flashes before your eyes as you die. The Glastonbury Festival has a population larger than Bath. Its scale is so vast it has its own hospital, wholesale market, sewerage system, and cast-iron preparations in case of disease outbreak or terrorist attack. Next year, it celebrates its 50th birthday – going from a £1 per ticket event in 1970, when Marc Bolan played and all attendees received free milk, to one of the defining events of the British calendar – attended by Prince Harry and Prince Charles, Brad Pitt, Kate Moss, Benedict Cumberbatch, the Beckhams and the Dalai Lama. It has survived floods, lightning strikes, stages being burned down, riots, protests, births, deaths and endless controversy, to become one of the best known, best loved brands in the world – the yearly scramble for tickets when they go on sale is global, with applications from Australia to Afghanistan. The organisers have been offered endless multi-million dollar deals to sell the brand, expand it, franchise it, roll it out internationally – all of which they have declined. Michael Eavis, Emily’s father, and a maternal rights campaigner, 2017GETTY IMAGES For, uniquely among festivals, it donates more than £3 million of its yearly profits to charities – Oxfam, Greenpeace and Water Aid. It has funded a whole housing project in the village of Pilton. It pioneers sustainable supply chains – this year, it goes wholly single-use plastic free – and its organisers are in demand, world experts in humanitarian disaster relief, for who else has the experience of building whole temporary camps in appalling weather, surrounded by freaked-out people? Glastonbury is one of the greatest British artistic and philanthropic success stories of all time. And yet it is a temporary, fleeting thing. The city appears at the summer solstice, in the Vale of Avalon, under the gaze of Glastonbury Tor, parties hard for five days, sending out kinetic images across the world – and then disappears, leaving not a single trace on the trampled grass. It’s like a Mardi Gras Brigadoon or cider-fuelled Land of Green Ginger. For the rest of the year, it’s just an ordinary, working dairy farm in Somerset, off the A361. For the rest of the year, it’s primarily a massive, ambitious, anxious, extraordinary idea in the head of Emily Eavis. And for Glastonbury 2019, I am following her, from start to finish, as she puts on the biggest festival on Earth. Sunday, October 7, 2018 261 days until the festival 8.30am. I am woken by six alarms going off in various rooms across the house. My teenage daughter wants to go to Glastonbury this year – and so she is up early to be ready online on the dot of 9am, when tickets go on sale. I go into her bedroom. She has her laptop, my laptop, my husband’s laptop and her phone all on the Glastonbury ticketing website. She is on FaceTime to a group of friends – who are all similarly poised before a bank of computers, ready to press “buy” the minute the site goes live. “I’m so scared!” she says. “What if I don’t get through? I WILL DIE OF SADNESS.” Sadness is fairly likely – this year, an unprecedented two million people have pre-registered for a ticket, but only a lucky 135,000 will be able to buy them. In 2017, the entire allocation sold out in 50 minutes flat. With no festival in 2018 – it was a customary “fallow” year – 2019 is predicted to be even quicker. “Oh babe, I’m sure you’ll be lucky …” I start. Paul McCartney, 2004GETTY IMAGES “Shut up! It’s happening! Oh my God! OH MY GOD!” she says, as the sales go live. She starts pressing “buy” on each available screen. On Facetime, I can hear all her other friends panicking and doing the same. Unable to bear the tension, I go downstairs to make a cup of tea. Twenty minutes later, I hear a scream: “F***! I’VE DONE IT! I’M GOIIIIIING!!!!!” The BBC News website is recording that Glastonbury 2019 has sold out in record time – 135,000 tickets at £248 each in 36 minutes flat. She is one of the very, very lucky ones. At 10am, I light a fag and call Emily Eavis. “How you doing, love?” I ask. “What you up to?” “I’m just walking around the site – I’m by the Pyramid Stage,” she says, slightly out of breath. “It’s a gorgeous day.” “So, record-breaker,” I say, “how are you feeling?” “Relieved it’s over, to be honest,” she says, cheerfully. “You want it over and done with quickly – so people can get on with their lives. So at least they know the sad news before breakfast.” “There’s a lot of trauma on Twitter,” I say, unhelpfully. “I know!” She sounds genuinely agonised. “It’s terrible – I just want to bring everyone in. We get people ringing the office at the farm. Someone called from Afghanistan at 9.30am, absolutely desperate. We get a lot of parents telling awful stories about how their child is the only one in their friendship group who didn’t get one and pleading. People sending in doctor’s certificates, saying it’s their last wish to go. We keep an allocation back for those,” she adds. “So, 175,000 people will be turning up in 261 days,” I say. “How are you feeling about that?” “Pressure,” she says, frankly. “Three months ago, it looked like we had three headliners – and now we’ve lost one. We’re reassuringly tense. My husband’s having sleepless nights, but I’m like, ‘It’ll be fine. It always is.’” I tell her I’ve been looking on Twitter, at all those disappointed by not getting tickets, and they’re suggesting several ideas she might want to consider. “Go on.” “Jodie B says, simply, ‘Why don’t you just make Glastonbury bigger?’” “What – big enough for all two million people?” “Yeah. Come on, you lazy cow.” Caitlin Moran and Emily EavisTOM JACKSON “The valley’s not big enough,” she says, like someone who has actually looked into throwing a festival for two million people. “We use the land of all 12 nearby farms now, and it physically can’t get any bigger without putting camping sites on the other side of a main road, which would be dangerous. So, sorry Jodie B. We’d love to, but we can’t.” “Jon Langford says, ‘I have a theory that only people who work in IT have broadband fast enough to get tickets, and so this ticketing system unfairly privileges nerds.’” Eavis laughs. “We’ve looked at the stats, and it’s an even spread across the country. We have tested the site – we sat in our office in Somerset and all tried to get on to buy tickets – and some could, and some couldn’t. And we’re not in IT. So we know it’s quite random.” With tickets so tight, people have, over the years, found … innovative ways to get into Glastonbury. In 2017, someone got over the 15ft high Super Fence “with a jet-pack. He landed in the Green Fields. At least, he toldus he’d used the jet-pack to get over the fence. Who knows?” She shrugs, amused. Then adds, casually, “There was a guy with a hang glider, too. He glided over the fence.” Did you throw him out? “Well, we were like, if you’ve gone to all the trouble of sorting out a hang glider, fair enough. Even security applauded him when he landed.” Eavis gets asked for tickets all the time. “The most notable was just after I gave birth to my first child,” she says. “It was a brutal, forceps birth. He came out screaming. And, as they were stitching me up, the midwife said, ‘Eavis … Eavis? Could you …?’” “What did you say?” I ask, aghast. “I said yes. I was off my face!” she laughs. January 16, 2019 160 days until the festival I am at Worthy Farm. It’s cold but sunny, and the ground is firm underfoot. I have been to every Glastonbury since I was 17 – back in 1992 – but I have never been here when the festival isn’t on. This sounds really obvious, but – it’s just a farm. There’s nothing here – no people, no stalls, no Dolly Parton, no tents, no flags. Only the Pyramid Stage, which stays up year-round, and a huge wooden pirate ship in the Greenpeace Field tell you this is anything other than a normal dairy farm, in a particularly lovely part of Somerset. “The local kids come and play on the pirate ship. We built them the new outdoor play area at the school, as well,” Eavis says. The festival generates £73 million for the UK economy We’re in a Land Rover, driving around the site. Every so often, I see a place I recognise from festival time – that tree, for instance, is where I saw a heavily disguised Lady Gaga out partying at 3am in 2009. And that glade – that glade is Strummerville, where the late Clash frontman used to hang out, around an all-night campfire, jamming. “Joe Strummer offered me my first ever drugs,” Eavis reminisces, changing gear as we go up a precipitous slope. “It was my 16th birthday, and he offered me a wrap. I didn’t want it – I’d seen too many people out of it, at the festival – but he thought I was just shy about having his drugs. He was being so courteous. He kept going, ‘Go on – it’s OK!’ And I was like, ‘I’m actually fine!’” We pull up outside the farm. In 2014, an office was built to house the organisation of the festival. Before then, all meetings still happened around the farmhouse table. “See that barn over there,” Eavis says, pointing. “The festival is in there.” I look confused. She laughs. “We try to minimise waste, so most of the festival – the stages, the signs, the benches – are flat-pack. When it finishes, we just fold everything down, put it in labelled containers and put it in there, ready for the next one.” We go into the office building. There’s a huge Lego model of the festival on the table, and a massive, life-sized cardboard cut-out of the Rolling Stones, who headlined in 2013, signed, “I was wrong – it was a great day,” by drummer Charlie Watts. Today is a massive planning meeting for the festival – the primary topics being security and sustainability. For 2019, Glastonbury – always one of the greenest festivals – is having an extra eco push. “We usually use over one million plastic bottles per festival,” Eavis says, starting the meeting. “This year, the target is zero.” The Rolling Stones, 2013PA All vendors on site will be banned from selling soft drinks in plastic bottles. Instead, they will sell cans of pop and water, which the festival will recycle in its own forge. Of course Glastonbury has its own forge. The festival is installing 37 stainless-steel water kiosks, 60 water stations and 500 drinking taps from which people can refill reusable water bottles – either their own or official Glastonbury ones they buy on site. “Be careful with the branding on the bottles,” Eavis warns. “I don’t want to make it look like we’re pushing merch at people. The message is, ‘Bring your own – but if you’ve forgotten, you can get one here.’” At the bars – which usually pump out more than 1.2 million drinks over the festival – new cups have been ordered. Instead of the traditional cardboard models, which are lined with non-recyclable plastic, the festival has tracked down a 25-year-old who has invented 100 per cent biodegradable bottles made of old newspapers. “Ask him if he thinks he could prototype a cup using the same technique,” Eavis suggests. There is a discussion of how they could fund him to pioneer this technology. No one else has tried it, but Eavis is determined. For 2019, the festival is also aiming to cut its power needs by a third, with a combination of efficiency measures and using the farm’s digester, which is run on methane produced by cow manure. The Pyramid Stage is already wholly run on a combination of methane and solar power. Eco matters sorted, the conversation moves on to security and event safety. What kind of things do you have to plan for, I ask. “Weather, contaminated drugs, bacterial outbreaks, terrorist threats,” Eavis begins, briskly. “If there was an outbreak of foot and mouth, the whole festival would be off. Volcanoes! When the Icelandic volcano erupted in 2010, we had loads of cancelled flights – artists just couldn’t come in. Lightning storms – we have to shut all the main stages. Rudimental didn’t play at the Pyramid, because we could see lightning coming in across the valley. Heatstroke – last year was so hot, we had to spray people with hoses as they came in, as they were so overheated from queuing. Structural collapse – festivals in other countries have had stages blow away. We stress-test everything. We had 80mph winds in 2008. We’re OK at 40mph. When it gets to 50mph, you have to close all the tents.” It’s a pretty terrifying list. Joe Strummer offered me my first ever drugs over there “2016 was the worst,” says Adrian. Adrian is operations director. “2016 was an extreme challenge.” So much rain fell in the preceding days that the Eavises had to warn people to delay their arrival. Michael Eavis said afterwards it was the worst weather they’d had in the festival’s entire 46-year history – the place was a treacherous, slippery swamp. I saw people sliding down liquid hills as if they were skiing. That year was an endurance. “I’ve never had so many people in tears in my office,” Eavis recalls. “The beefiest security guards, they’d walk in and just weep. There were very strong suggestions that we pull the entire festival. The roads were blocked, we couldn’t get people on or off site …” And yet, despite the nightmare for the organisers, most festival-goers will primarily remember 2016 as the year they pulled on their wellies, had an extra nip from their hipflasks, still enjoyed headline sets from Adele, Coldplay and LCD Soundsystem, and vowed to buy tickets for the next year. “That’s why, at the meeting, we finally decided we’d crack on,” Eavis says, shrugging. At this point, Michael Eavis – Emily’s father, founder and co-organiser of Glastonbury – comes in. Despite it being January and cold, he’s wearing his customary outfit of shorts and sandals, augmented with black, leather, fingerless gloves. He’s a powerful presence, even at the age of 83. He immediately seems to know what the conversation is about. “The only thing that will ever stop us,” he says, firmly, “is Chinese chicken flu. That’s the only one. We never stop for rain. Nothing would ever, ever stop me.” “Michael loves a crisis,” Eavis says, fondly. “People were sliding in the car parks – and they loved it!” Michael cries. “It’s an adventure training course! It’s character-forming!” During this meeting, it has occurred to me that Emily Eavis doesn’t just run a festival – she is basically the head of an alternate future city-state, with pioneering technology. 1971CAMERA PRESS And yet it’s not a role anyone can apply for: there has never been a vacancy for “organiser of the Glastonbury Festival”. It is a role this quiet, shy woman has unexpectedly inherited – taking over from the charismatic, ground-breaking King of Festivals when the family faced a life-changing crisis. In a way, she’s like the Princess Elizabeth of revelries – set for an ordinary life, until fate took a couple of left turns and landed her with responsibilities she could never have dreamt of. May 31, 2019 25 days until the festival Eavis picks me up at Castle Cary station. At festival time, the car park is filled with thousands of festival-goers, sitting on rucksacks, smoking fags, politely queuing for the festival’s fleet of double-decker buses. Now, in May, it’s empty. “Things are going good!” she says, in answer to my inquiry, barrelling down country lanes. “We’ve got 200 people on site now, building – by May, it’s got its own momentum. We’ve got our final headliner – the Killers! And we’re building a giant, 50ft-high head in Block 9,” she concludes, as if this is a perfectly normal thing. “This bit of the year is so addictive. The buzz. There’s nothing better.” What makes this conversation extraordinary is something Eavis casually mentioned last time I saw her. That, as a child, she hated the festival. “Yes – I can say that,” she says, thoughtfully. “I hated it. I just associated it with … fear. My parents would be so, so stressed about it. They often didn’t book the headliners until March, April – so there would be a whole year of being scared we wouldn’t actually have any bands. When the festival was on, I would just close my bedroom curtains and pretend it wasn’t happening.” I’ve been going to Glastonbury every year since 1992. It is, without exception, my best week of the year: five days in a place filled with joy, creativity and endless diversion. Eavis is only five years younger than me. I can’t believe she hated having the most amazing festival in the world happen in her own backyard. “Really? You hated it?” I query, astonished. “Do you want to see something?” she asks, turning the car down a single-track lane. After half a mile, Eavis pulls into a lay-by, and points. “Look.” There, in the middle of the field – on top of a hill – is a huge, white crucifix, 30ft high. “That’s been there since 1990,” she says. “A neighbour put it up. To protect the village from the evil of the festival.” I look at it. “It lights up at night,” she says, helpfully. “You can see it from the festival site. The festival had a bad reputation when I was growing up,” she says, turning the engine on and driving away. I watch the crucifix recede in the rear-view mirror. “At school, the rumour was that there were people at the festival who went around injecting people with drugs. I’d get kids all the time, saying, ‘My parents say your parents run a festival where people inject people with drugs.’ It was … difficult.” As a child, I hated the festival. My parents would be so stressed The village treated the Eavises warily. There were constant complaints to the local council – about the traffic, about the travellers, about the noise. Every year, it was a major fight to put the festival on again. In 1990, its future was put into doubt after violence broke out between travellers and the on-site security guards, in an event that was subsequently known as “the Battle of Yeoman’s Bridge”. Despite having performed at the festival at the age of five – singing Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star on the Pyramid Stage, before the Style Council headlined – Eavis felt wary about it. Then Britpop happened. “I was 14, 15, and suddenly bands I likedstarted to play. I can remember Rage Against the Machine headlining in 1994, and thinking, ‘This is amazing.’ Then Pulp headlined in 1995, and that was it. I loved it. I thought, ‘I am going to enjoy these last few years.’” Back then, the plan was that the festival would end, on a glorious high, on its 30th birthday – June 2000. By the time the BBC started televising Glastonbury in 1997, the “edginess” of the Eighties had dissolved, and Glastonbury had begun to establish itself as part of the English season: like a pagan Glyndebourne or Wimbledon, with drugs. But the family had sacrificed any semblance of a normal life to do it – and so the Eavises planned to finally retire in 2000 and enjoy some sunset years of stress-free leisure, without 175,000 people pooing in their hedges. However, brutally, and unexpectedly, Jean was diagnosed with cancer in January 1999 – and died just four months later. “It was awful – so fast,” Eavis says, now. “We found out in January – and by May 15, she was dead.” The shock still shows on her face now. The 29th Glastonbury Festival started, relentlessly, just 41 days later. “That was a bit of a blur,” Eavis admits. “We were just … so sad.” Plunged into mourning, with all his retirement plans in pieces, and not really knowing any other way to deal with the grief, Michael Eavis made a decision: he would now continue Glastonbury, as the only way he knew to pay tribute to his late wife. Aware of just what an immense emotional burden this was for her father, Eavis, aged just 19 – and by now a trainee teacher in Newham, London – gave it up to return home and co-run the festival she had once hated; at first alone, and then with her husband, music manager Nick Dewey, who was a long-time attendee of the festival. The first year he attended, he had no ticket; he blagged his way in by pretending that he managed Coldplay. “He had … the Glastonbury spirit,” she laughs. Adele, 2016REX SHUTTERSTOCK Eavis turned up to her 2009 wedding to Dewey in a customised East German IFA jet on wheels – courtesy of the festival’s endlessly creative mechanical team – and had a later pagan ceremony on the festival site, by the stone circle. Guy Garvey of Elbow, James Dean Bradfield from the Manic Street Preachers and the Chemical Brothers played at the reception, as befits festival royalty. Over the years, as Michael got older, Eavis and Dewey gradually assumed more and more responsibilities for the festival. They had a sense that what was a very white, male and increasingly ageing musical line-up desperately needed rebooting for the 21st century, and, in 2008, Eavis and Dewey took the necessary risk of securing the festival’s first ever hip-hop headliner: global superstar Jay-Z. “Oh, God,” Eavis says, still visibly traumatised by the memory. “That year was so, so terrifying.” The controversy over his booking was immediate and overwhelming. The music press were up in arms, as were a vocal contingent of old-skool Glastonbury-goers. Oasis’s Noel Gallagher spoke for many of them when he gave an interview, saying, “I’m sorry – but Jay-Z? No chance. Glastonbury has a tradition of guitar music, do you know what I mean? I’m not having hip-hop at Glastonbury, no way. It’s wrong.” Because of the controversy, for the first time in years, tickets didn’t sell out in advance – the festival’s finances were in a perilous state, and many accused Eavis of “ruining” her father’s festival. Michael Eavis himself was unsure of the booking: “He was supportive of our choice, but he wanted Rod Stewart,” Eavis says. Friends who know Eavis said she was, at the time, “almost broken” in the run-up to the event. “It was an intense amount of pressure for her to be under,” one says. “It seemed as if she was fighting on several fronts: to help the festival grow, to maintain its identity and integrity – but also stay at the cutting edge of festival culture, which was changing.” A male-dominated music industry and press seemed intent on casting her as a clueless, wilful girl into “the wrong” kind of music. Her friend summarises: “I worried it was just too much for her, and she basically wouldn’t put on the festival again.” Emily Eavis and the Dalai Lama, 2015GETTY IMAGES In the event, however, Eavis’s carefully calibrated risk-taking was a vital turning point in Glastonbury’s fortunes. Not a billionaire hip-hop mogul by accident, Jay-Z had prepared cleverly: coming onstage singing Oasis’s Wonderwall, in acknowledgment of the controversy – and then, having won over the crowd with one perfectly weighted, swaggering in-joke, ploughing into a version of 99 Problems so incendiary, the field erupted. Not only was it one of the all-time Glastonbury Moments, but the resulting euphoric reviews allowed the festival to open up to a phalanx of genres and acts previously unthinkable: Pharrell Williams, Mary J Blige, Kanye West, Stormzy, Beyoncé. Suddenly, the biggest hip-hop, R’n’B and grime acts were “Glastonbury material”, at a time when white guitar-rock was dwindling. The festival gained a massive injection of energy and relevancy. Beyoncé’s booking – still spoken of in tones of awe – was a massive coup. Eavis courted her assiduously when she came with her husband, Jay-Z, and “bombarded” her with information on the festival’s ecological and philanthropic activity: “I think Beyoncé was my finest hour – we pulled out all the stops.” Beyoncé’s legendary advent onto the Glastonbury stage – Crazy in Love into Single Ladies, with £50,000 of fireworks going off – was an heroic act. “No one knew she was pregnant, and she had terrible morning sickness just before she went on stage. Proper …” Eavis mimes finger-down-throat vomiting. “Acts like that don’t need the festival, and we don’t have the fees other festivals can offer, because we give so much away,” Eavis explains. “So we have to love-bomb them.” Glastonbury’s unique appeal is a combination of incredible exposure – the BBC covers it less like arts programming and more like a major cultural news event, meaning that acts’ back catalogues regularly go into the Top Ten the week after broadcast – and a growing cadre of former performers who will evangelise about how the Glastonbury audience is like no other. After he played Glastonbury in 2013, Kenny Rogers persuaded Dolly Parton to appear the next year (“Kenny puts a word in with everyone he meets in his circle”). Coldplay brought Barry Gibb along and convinced him to play his 2017 set. After Carrie Fisher died in 2016, Eavis discovered she had attended the festival every year with a group of friends: Princess Leia had been wandering through the crowds and no one knew. Real royalty – Prince Harry – had done the same: turning up in 2013 with minimal security, he spent the weekend without anyone recognising him. “I recommended he should go on into the night,” says Eavis, “because the nightlife is what Glastonbury is all about.” He didn’t leave until 4am. When Harry’s father, Prince Charles, attended the festival in 2010, his presence was, unfortunately, more noticeable. “He was up in the Greenpeace Field, checking out some ecological initiatives,” Eavis recalls, “and one of the Greenpeace guys working there had met Charles before, on another project. He went running over, shouting, ‘Hi!’” As far as Prince Charles’s security were concerned, however, a very hairy man was running towards the heir to the throne – and so they pulled their guns to protect him. “We had to do some very fast talking there,” Eavis laughs. “God! Imagine! If we’d had our first ever shooting – and it was the royal household taking out a hippy. In the Greenpeace Field.” Emily and Michael Eavis in the EightiesEMILY_EAVIS/INSTAGRAM We are, by now, in Eavis’s back garden on Worthy Farm. Willows brush the daisy-speckled lawn and the air is heavy with a tangle of roses. Her three children play on a swing. The incongruity of the scene is the embodiment of Glastonbury – a cheerful but quiet woman, fresh-faced in dungarees, pours tea into bone-china cups, as in the background the constant “beep beep beep” of reversing JCBs reminds you that over the wall the world’s biggest party-cum-cultural-event-cum-vision-of-the-future is being erected on her fields. As we sip our tea, a helicopter buzzes the site. “People always want to come and check it out,” she says, waving. “Apparently, Prince William flew over last week.” There is no real privacy when your address is a byword for excitement. Last year, a French teenager turned up, “having walked all the way from France. He kept saying, ‘Radiohead?’ The festival wasn’t on.” What did you do? “We just gave him a sandwich.” Similarly, a coach full of Japanese tourists once parked up in the driveway – confused as to why all they could find was some cows. “We didn’t have enough sandwiches for all of them,” Eavis sighs. Perhaps it’s because I have a Pavlovian, haptic memory of all the joy I have experienced here, but as Eavis is joined by her husband, and I watch this young, warm, simply good couple talking about their plans for the future – how Madonna would be their dream booking for next year; how to provide more physiotherapy for the exhausted set-builders on site; how to increase their involvement in refugee camps – I feel impossibly moved. Eavis has built a 15ft-high grassy mound at the end of the garden, so she can sit and watch the festival site unobserved, and I sit there, smoking a cigarette, and thinking what an absolutely unique thing Glastonbury is. It’s not done for money – there’s no corporate branding, no advertising. While the festival generates £73 million for the British economy, Dewey and Eavis live a very modest life. And it’s not done for fame or glory – Eavis, in her dungarees, attends no parties or red carpets. It’s done for a reason we hear so little of these days: to make hundreds of thousands of people, in the English midsummer, happy. A non-stop, round-the-clock, 120-hour celebration of what humans can do when they want to immerse themselves in the simple exuberance of existing – from the Dance Tent in the valley to the deep peace of the Park; a whole city lit with lanterns and fairylights. The Eavises have made a little kingdom of joy here, fuelled only by decades of exhilarating ideas made real, and there is nothing – nothing – else like it. Here’s a thing: every so often during the festival, you will suddenly hear a cheer begin – a cheer, followed by wild applause. The first time you come, you presume something has happened – a celebrity has arrived, a show has finished. Eventually, you realise: people are just cheering the festival. They’re just cheering being alive. They’re just cheering being here. “When the gates open on June 25,” Eavis says, joining me, as we watch the JCBs trundle across the meadows, “my father and I go down to greet everyone coming on site. He greets everyone, like, ‘Hello! Welcome!’, and they hug him. They all recognise him.” And what do you do? Do you say “Welcome!”? “Oh, no. I just stand back and watch,” she says, smiling.
  2. 66 points
    RAM jam jar = no rain recorded in 24 hours Well sticky sick = no water in well. Mud showing at 3 inches but good to firm. big dogs paws = dry. Some slobber from gob after walk ground dry, no mud warmer today and some patchy sun.
  3. 63 points
    So we had rain over night. It is currently NOT raining in Pilton but looking very overcast. RAM jam jar = 3mm rain fell over night Well sticky stick = no water in well. Mud showing at 3.5 inches soft to wet big dogs paws = Refuses to go out. Must have a bladder the size of a space hopper by now. ground wet will update this afternoon after I’ve dragged the mutt out (by the collar if necessary) and walked the top of the farm.
  4. 60 points
    Hi all. I CANNOT BELIEVE IT!!! I won the eFests competition! Just emailed Neil over my details which I’m sure will all be fine! SO HAPPY! Good luck to everyone else in the competitions and if I should win (unlikely) I’ll see if I can sort them for someone here! Thank you Neil @eFestivals
  5. 58 points
    It seems to have become a bit of a regular thread now. Not sure quite which year I first started it but it's back! Towed a couple of crew caravans onto site this evening. The ground is as dry as Ghandi's sandal. I suspect that this will change, but only slightly, during the next few days as some light rain is expected on and off for the next week or so. that's not such a bad thing as it was very dusty driving around site. I'll update this thread from time to time with posts increasing as the show gets closer. A few rather poor pics from this evening. The light was starting to fade by the time I'd installed the workers into their new homes. First pic was me trying to show the huge clouds of dust thrown up behind Ste's (Bro in law AKA Hagrid ) Transit. Didn't capture it very well. Only doing 10 MPH. Dread to think what it is like with heavy plant trundleing around in working hours.
  6. 52 points
  7. 40 points
    Hey everyone! I reckon I've just about finished updating the Glasto tube-style map for 2019. You guys have given some useful feedback on this the last couple of times and I know a few of you have found it useful so let me know what you think! This is based on as much as I could glean from a fairly recent General Site Plan and various comments from all over. I've managed to cram in a few more points of interest, hopefully without getting too cramped, reworked Silver Hayes to better reflect the layout, and updated the naughty corner to match the current set up. It aint perfect – wanted to add a few other bits and pieces – but think it's pretty much ready. Are there any glaring flaws? Obvious omissions? Want to draw a line under it soon so I can get it printed to go outside the Green Welfare tent 🗺️☕🎪
  8. 38 points
    Just left site. Not too bad. Gateway into Crew Field blocked to avoid swampification but ground still very firm.
  9. 36 points
    You twisted my arm... put another log on the fire and pass the hip flask. It's a long yarn, but a good one. Anyone who was there in 2007 knows there was only one way to survive that weekend - and it wasn't to be present in your own head. My housemate and I had made the dubious choice of buying a load of random crap from EDIT before the festival (the folly of youth!) - various leaves, extracts and pills... almost all absolutely awful resulting in grinding teeth and headaches. By Saturday morning there was nothing left apart from tired legs and crushing hangovers, so we made the executive decision to head over to Dance Village and take in a Wrong Music showcase whilst keeping an eye out for passing, ahem, 'businessmen' who might sell us something that actually works. Didn't take us long and we'd found someone who sold me a handful of "absolute bangers, mate" outside a bar tent... in the pouring rain, I decided the safest place for them was a container that used to contain some of the legal highs. As I'm closing up the lid, I get a tap on the shoulder from a Stuart Security bloke... look round and there's three of them. B*llocks. I quickly made sure to tell them my friend had eff all to do with any of it and he disappeared to let our other friends know what had happened whilst security took 'care' of me behind one of the fences. Gave me the full unpleasant security experience to the best of their abilities... in my bag I had the remnants of the legal highs, over half an ounce of lovely thai stick and the newly acquired pills and a few bits of clothing... everything including my clothes and bag got dropped in the mud whilst they "searched". The security meatheads made sure I knew I'd be arrested, ejected from the festival and would end up with a court date in the next month or so... they even said I'd be banned from future festivals. After a thoroughly unpleasant half hr with them the Avon and Somerset police turned up with a Land Rover and took over. Drove me a short way to two portakabins they had set up just outside the fence with another guy who was obviously in a similar situation to conduct formal searches. The other guy got led by another PC into one of the rooms first and as he did, he flicked a little baggy out of his pocket into the mud. The officer standing with me, saw it, picked it up and gave it to the other cop then came back to me... "Did you see that?" "Yeah, did he toss a baggy into the mud?" "Yep, now my colleague has to get his rubber gloves on and give him the full works. You're not going to do anything that silly are you?" "Err, absolutely not officer..!" From then on we had a pretty decent banter going... he took me into the other portakabin and took all the dodgy stuff out of my bag... legal stuff on one side, pills and weed on the other. We were in there probably 30 mins waiting for transport to the temporary cells at the Showground and we chatted the whole time... he was complaining about the fact security kept bringing them in soft targets like me who "aren't causing any trouble, but just cutting loose on their time off" who the cops really didn't care about rather than genuinely violent/nasty people who would make the festival dangerous and unpleasant for everyone else. By the end of it we had agreed in any other circumstance we'd probably enjoy sharing a pint together. He said the worst I'd get was a caution and a free bus back into the site. When the transport to the showground arrived, the guy took my bag of weed, put it with the legal highs and told me to put it all back in my bag. "I need to send the pills for testing because that's what you were brought in for, but I'm happy everything over here is fine and you won't get searched again" Utter legend of a man. Was at the showground for around 3-4 hours... everyone else was there for an hour or so. Get in, test the drugs, caution, back on the bus. After 3 hours I call over to a PC and ask what's taking so long "Not sure, but we're having trouble with your test results. I'll try and get someone to come over." In the end they took me for processing without the test results... the pills had tested negative for MDMA and Cocaine and those were the only tests they had on site. Yep, unless I'd accidentally bought something really weird, they were DUDS. In the end, they bus me back to site on bail pending results of the further tests which took some explaining at the gate (everyone assumed if I was on bail rather than just getting cautioned on the spot I must have done something SERIOUS!), but I finally made it back in and back to my tent around 2am and I can honestly say I have never enjoyed a cuddle from two men and a spliff as much as I did right then. On Sunday afternoon I had a call from the WPC who interviewed me the night before. The results had come back and the pills contained.... CAFFEINE. 😣😂😤
  10. 35 points
    Okay let do my best here to tip some folks wise: Genosys – major doof with a twist HAAi is the new superstar of the Daniel Avery / Andrew Weatherall / Erol Alkan world. Trippy, rock-informed techno. She will level the place. Same too Anthony Parasole and Randomer. Massive warehouse bangers with a hint of trance uplift. Here's a good starter on HAAi: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=btFDS6bdb8w Honcho is the best gay party in America, Leeon is a resident of Bogota's Video Club, Partok is the biggest name to come from Tel Aviv's The Block, Dan Beaumont runs Chapter 10, Roi Perez is a current poster boy of Panoramabar and Siren are a young collective running great pro-femme underground raves in London. You're basically getting the cutting edge of queer techno in the open air, in spaces which used to be for the veterans of Detroit and Chicago, which is a bold and great move imho. IICON – big league experimental electronics under a ridiculous conceptual structure best seen to be believed Batu and the Zenker Brothers are behind two of the hottest labels going (Timedance and Ilian Tape respectively), absolutely phenomenal DJs blending all aspects of broken techno, garage, dubstep, breakbeat, whatever. Bruce, Hodge and Stenny will play similarly but this, from Batu, is best go-to: https://soundcloud.com/dkmntl/batu-at-dekmantel-selectors-2018 Moor Mother is like an Afrofuturist Kate Tempest. This lecture is fascinating stuff and her performances are pretty astounding: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VPWi2wJELh4 L-Vis 1990, Kode9, Manthe Ribane, Demdike Stare, Lee Gamble will all fall into sounds of the UK underground that used to fill the actual London Underground, envoys of Hyperdub, DDS and Night Slugs. Don't miss the small-font Hessle Audio, which is Ben UFO, Pearson Sound and Pangaea. Musically, the stage is largely a monument to the "continuum" of jungle, dubstep, soundscapes, rave etc. NYC Downlow & Meat Rack – queer mania Legend O'Clock: Mr Fingers will be the deeper version of Larry Heard, I expect. Add him to Tony Humphries (Club Zanzibar in New Jersey, think Ron Trent level thick, disco-y house and you're there) and Erick Morillo (tribal king of NYC and Ibiza) and you've got a mega trio. The Black Madonna people probably know, this time b2b with Garrett David, who's a resident at Queen! in Chicago's Smartbar and releases on Lobster Theremin too. They will be great fun. Same too Midland and Gideön, they know the territory intimately. Sweely is one for the minimal lovers, quite like Traumer or Margaret Dygas. Interesting pick for there. Mexican Jihad also interesting, part of the NAAFI label, eclectic bass stuff. Wes Baggaley, Dan Shake, Trouble Vision et al carry this on in the Meat Rack, which is even more sordid. Dan was very good fun last time, played a lot of Brazilian edits which had sweat dripping. Hope that helps
  11. 34 points
    I DID IT GUYS!!! I’ve managed to grab a slot off them, just filling out the form now for the festival. Wow. Incredible.
  12. 33 points
    Band sings a song about killing tories, national news. Tories enact policies that end up killing the poor, the sick, the disabled, the homeless, the elderly and end up reducing the life expectancy of the whole nation, just another day at the office.
  13. 33 points
    Update..... We both now have tickets!!!! We tried for tickets last October but weren't lucky. A few months later my wife became pregnant so we weren't fussed about missing out. A very shitty 10-week pregnancy was followed by a miscarriage, which we were obviously devastated about. Decided to try for tickets in the resale to have a bit of a blow out but were again unlucky. Then a few days ago my friend, who is a booking agent said he may be able to sort two tickets. They've now been confirmed. I am down as one of his DJs photographers, so have to take photos for him when he's playing (not my forte but I'll learn fast). But fuck it, we're going to Glastonbury!!!!! So emotional right now.
  14. 29 points
    Apologies for radio silence this morning. I was busy trying to stop Big Dog from getting killed/ killing the scaffolders as he is incredibly nosey. Good job he can’t climb ladders....or at least I don’t think he can. ok so since last reported we have had 1mm of rain recorded in the RAM jam jar. Current level is 36mm since Monday lunchtime. there is NO water in the well. The stick is showing 6 inches of wet from the mud but this is where the water would have drained away this morning. So a better reading will be tonight once the draining has finished. the sun is out, light breeze and it’s warmed up loverly. Big Dog has even decided it’s nice enough to lay out in the garden. Although this could be because he’s passed out, exhausted from keeping an eye on the scaffolders and not having a morning snooze/ fart session as per normal.
  15. 28 points
    The sun is out now and it’s warm. Got a proper sweat on during my run. Not many puddles to dodge either. The tidal wave at the side of the house has now disappeared, as if it never existed.
  16. 27 points
    You think they’d release the weather now the full lineup is out.
  17. 25 points
    Hi guys. As suggested by @JoeyT - I've updated the Rainfall records summary table I put together in 2017... The historical data is taken from here: https://www.metoffice.gov.uk/hadobs/hadukp/data/download.html And the 2019 June figures are taken from here: https://wow.metoffice.gov.uk/observations/details/?site_id=3017226 Neither are Pilton specific, but they give a general view of how wet the weather was in the build up to the festival. The rain yesterday seemed to hit the weather station (which is just west of the M5) more heavily that on the ground reporters @deebeedoobee, @pilton digger and Big Dog would suggest. If anyone knows a closer weather station that records rainfall, please let me know. Some thoughts... 2007 shows that grim mud will still arrive if heavy rain continues to fall over festival weekend, even if the build up is dry. 2009, 2010 and 2017 show that a dry spring will let the ground easily cope with a wet first week of June. Like we've had so far in 2019. 2011 and 2016 show that a pretty soggy fortnight prior to gates opening will result in tough conditions. So.... As has been suggested many times, the table backs up the view that if the wet stuff can keep calm over the next couple of weeks, the pretty rubbish start to June will be forgotten. Also, if we'd had a festival in 2018, it would have been like tarmac. Conversely, 2012 would have been snorkels and canoes all round. (Seriously, compare the numbers to 2016 and 2007...).
  18. 25 points
    Just want to say thanks for watching my video glad you all enjoyed it. Sorry about the beeping noise 😂
  19. 25 points
  20. 24 points
    Here's my updated list based on recent posts in this and related threads and with some updated locations. Not limited to traders who have confirmed for 2019. I'm salivating like a wolf. Apparently there should be some music as well. Meal Name/Description Area Bread Lynda's Loaf Greenpeace Breakfast Breakfast Club Between Darble and Gate A Breakfast Children's World Café Between Cabaret and Circus Breakfast Diver's Diner Bottom of Cockmill / Muddy Lane Breakfast Greenpeace Café Greenpeace Breakfast Hall's Dorset Smokery Williams Green Breakfast Yellow Van Between West Holts and Leftfield Cheesy Anna Mae's Mac N Cheese Between Pyramid and Bandstand, Acoustic Cheesy Cheese Truck Top of Big Ground, Exit from Shangri La Cheesy Le Grande Bouffe Between West Holts and Yeoman's Bridge, Market Area Cheesy Le Rac Shack Opp Cider Bus between Pyramid and Williams Green Cheesy Tom's Toasties Campervan Field Chips Chunky Chips Wicked Dips Silver Hayes Coffee Camper Coffee Between Pylon Ground and Silver Hayes Coffee Greenpeace Café Greenpeace Coffee Proper Coffee Corner walking from Williams Green into Circus Field Fish/Seafood Crabbieshack Leftfield Fish/Seafood Fabulous Fish Finger Market between Pyramid and John Peel Fish/Seafood Happy Maki Sushi Williams Green Indian Bhangra Bus Leftfield Indian Chapati Man Between Other and Leftfield Indian Dosa Deli Between Pyramid and Silver Hayes, Williams Green near Meeting Point Indian Gandhi's Flip Flop Between West Holts and Williams Green Indian Goan Seafood Company West Holts Indian Peckish Peacock Between Pyramid and Beats Hotel, Park by Rabbit Hole Indian Samosas Other Stage on left from Pyramid Indian Seasonal Samosas Avalon Indian Thali Café Park, Craft Indian Zouk Indian Street Food West Holts International Flavours of Africa Williams Green International Jumping Bean Burritos Between West Holts and Williams Green International Luardos Burritos Bright Pink truck on far right of Other Stage International Soulful Food Near West Holts International Tapas Flamenco Lady Near West Holts International Tibetan Kitchen On left of Pyramid, between Other Stage and Silver Hayes International Uptown Catering BBQ Jerk Chicken BBC Introducing, Williams Green near Bread and Roses Jacket Potatoes Tom's Spuds Green Kids Meat Burger Bear Block 9 Meat Burger Beyond Between Other and Pyramid Meat Buttermilk Chicken Burgers Silver Hayes between Sonic and Wow Meat Eat the Farm Yellow VW between West Holts and Leftfield Meat Flying Cow Park Meat King of the Yorky Puddings Pyramid on right hand side Meat Piggie Smalls Silver Hayes, West Holts, Fire Pit J Market Meat Roaming Rotisserie Williams Green Pies & Pasties Barnaby Sykes Between West Holts and Leftfield Pies & Pasties Welsh Oggie Between Other Stage and Silver Hayes Pizza Pan de Mania Theatre & Circus - Astrolabe Pizza Pizza Tabun Croissant Neuf Pizza Tommy's Pizzeria Block 9 Pizza Wood Fired Acoustic Vegetarian Club Mexicana Between Other Stage and Pyramid Vegetarian Goodness Gracious Houmous Other Stage, Pyramid, Meeting Place, Park Vegetarian Henry's Beard Green Futures Vegetarian Leon's Meze Park, West Holts near Brothers' Bar Vegetarian Manic Organic Between Avalon and Greenpeace Vegetarian No Bones Jones Between West Holts and Yeoman's Bridge Vegetarian Veggies Green Futures Vegetarian Wholefood Heaven Buddha Bowls Between Pyramid and Leftfield near Chameleon bar Sweet Cake Hole Acoustic Sweet Fruit Cup Yeoman's Bridge between West Holts and Williams Green Sweet Los Churros Amigos Entrance to Park Sweet Lovington's Ice Cream & Milkshakes Yeoman's Bridge between West Holts and Williams Green Sweet Mendip Moments Ice Cream Park Sweet Shaken Udder Milkshakes Between Pyramid and Leftfield, between West Holts and Greenpeace Sweet Small World Tent cakes Green Futures Sweet Smoothies Silver Hayes, West Holts Thai Thai Angle Leftfield
  21. 24 points
    Jackson Five 4, Gang of Four 5
  22. 23 points
    Why did I have this? I own a small property clearance business and this was amongst the rubbish cleared. Why did you take it to Glasto? Why not, as soon as I saw it it was meant to be. Come on, we all know that feeling. What did you do with it at Glasto? Walked around with it, stopped at random busy pathway junctions and used it to it's full potential much to the amusement and embarrassment of my three kids. Was also handy for warming french bread and brie up over the camp fire. Would I take another crossing lollipop to Glasto? No, that would be silly.
  23. 23 points
    'Twas the night before Techno Christmas, when all through the acid house Not a creature was stirring, not even a Deadmau5
  24. 21 points
    Just put finishing touches to my 'Armadillo' caravan (with beer tin roof) whose first major outing will be to Campervan West...it was inspired by James Noble's Arkette which has been in the Greenfields a couple of times.
  25. 21 points
    You got to make sure you take points off the teams around you.
  26. 20 points
  27. 19 points
    How about a little efestivals fundraiser. As laid out very honestly in the Gold Membership Time thread in Glastonbury Chat, the ad revenue for this site has really dropped off, despite being as popular as ever, so if we want it to continue we'll have to get a little creative... I've just won two tickets for Christine and the Queens All Points East. It's for Sunday 26th May in Victoria Park. £65 each I think. I can't use them as a) I live in Cumbria b) I work on Sundays C) not really a fan tbh I reckon a blind auction could raise a few quid for the site. Message me with a bid you are happy to pay for the tickets. If, at the end, yours is the highest bid then the tickets are yours. A few quid in the pot for efestivals and a couple of cheap (but not too cheap hopefully) tickets for you. If we say midnight Sunday 19th as the cut off point. I'll let the winner know on Monday and once they've paid their donation to efestivals (show a receipt or Neil confirms maybe) I'll email the tickets over I've checked and as far as i can tell there should be no problem with entry (tickets have my name on and 'Competition Winner') but if anyone knows any different please say Don't post bids on here, message me with them, and good luck! Feel free to share far and wide especially if you know a fan who wants tickets
  28. 17 points
    he has been round and eaten some rabbit scut, failed to spot a security guard in high vis walking past until it scared the bejeesus out of him, studied the going and we can say that it is officially good to firm.
  29. 17 points
    Currently very pleasant in Pilton. Back doors open, washing drying on the line, birds are tweeting (loudly...shhhh) and completely dry. In fact i have added a very high spec rain fall calculator (glass jam jar...recycling) to complement my sticky stick well measurements. Don't listen to the scientists, I'm here on the (very hard) ground in Pilton.
  30. 17 points
  31. 17 points
  32. 17 points
  33. 16 points
    Wouldn't even click on the link.
  34. 16 points
    I certainly did not do that as that meant it was murder getting back out - sure we would camp next to our cars but we always made certain it was closer to a exit route - sure there was always some drivers that were so out of it they were never going to move but it was rare that we were ever boxed in - that onsite mechanic must have made a bomb as there was always cars that needed a jump start or they had ran out of fuel - never had to use them myself so have no idea what they charged.Sure under current H&S rules and with so many cars it would never work now but it was good while it lasted. +-*
  35. 16 points
  36. 16 points
    Sure, they've dismantled and reassembled a monolithic dock crane into some sort of installation based around fiery prehistoric world building, and sure they've booked some of the biggest and best DJs in the world to play it, but if there's no acrobats then I'm afraid I will be writing to the ombudsman.
  37. 16 points
    Fellow Resalers.... I’ve done it, gone and bagged a spot on the stewarding team for Oxfam!!! A great great poster messaged me and I managed to grab it! I can’t believe it!!
  38. 16 points
    Hi guys, Super long time lurker here posting my first post, couldn't remember this being mentioned before, but apologies if it has already been discussed. I've been to the festival many times as a paying customer but this year will be my first going there to do my day job, ambulance dispatcher. We've been told that we will be using a free app called 'what 3 words' to help find people if they call 999 from site. I don't recall this ever being actively encouraged or advertised anywhere, not sure why as the more people who know about it can only be a good thing. So in the unlikely event any of you guys need to call for help (and even more unlikely event you have enough battery on your phone) you can switch on your location, open up the app and give the three word sentence generated by the app to give your exact location to within 3 meters. This is not just handy to know at the festival, but more and more emergency services across the country are starting to use it in every day life too. Also, after having spent 3 hours searching for my car on the Monday morning of 2016, I would've paid good money for someone to tell me its exact location, so the app could come in handy for that 😁
  39. 16 points
    Deadline for readying all the assets hitting now. They can't push it beyond the weekend – next 48hrs it's due. Suffice to say, no-one is walking away from this thread unhappy. Some absolute pearlers and one hell of a redesign.
  40. 15 points
    Folks please calm down. Those of you who don’t live in Pilton - you have weather , same as Pilton, but not the SAME as Pilton. so we had drizzle from 2.30 yesterday. It did NOT bucket down, it just rained. This morning, currently it is not raining. The birds are tweeting. The high tech ram jar rain measure says 2cm
  41. 15 points
    Due to the amount of angst being displayed about the state of the ground me and the dog have been for a wander in the nice weather down past site. Whilst in the G car park he coincidently has carried out some confirmatory ground hardness testing in the form of a Clegg Hammer Reading test conducted by dropping a large turd from height but it proved inconclusive. The clever bit was when he went straight into a modified Rockwell Hardness procedure which I shall now designate as the Rockwell Hardness Scale L (BBD) using a Big Black Dog as the indenter. He took the initial Clegg attempt turd as the applied minor load and used his back right foot as the major load. The major load was applied on top of the minor load and then in classic Rockwell style, removed leaving the minor load (minus the bits now between his toes). The depth of penetration from the zero datum is measured, the penetration depth and hardness are inversely proportional as we all know. He then inspected for indentation as if surprised he had stood in his own shit. I was happy to see that despite people’s massive overreaction to a bit of a shower, an indentation was not visible. It is still as hard as a hard thing in hard town on hard Tuesday I have since spent some time cleaning shit out of a dogs paw. Living the feckin dream again
  42. 15 points
    Was such a lovely warm evening. Here’s a few images
  43. 15 points
    I was at a WBC Organiser Planning meeting yesterday Carlsberg Tuborg will not be at Glastonbury 2019 - I am sure many will be glad of that - I have been banging onto the WBC for years to sell normal Carlsberg. it will be Carlsberg Danish Pilsner - two versions of Cider with Burrow Hill Cider being cheaper !!! A new version of the paper cup will be used. No plastic bottled water - they will be selling water in a tin no details of the prices yet as I know ' they don't fix the prices until next Month ' as I mentioned elsewhere some of the WBC Bars will be revamped and the big thing is ' they are ditching the old card system ' for a hard wired system so you wont see servers standing on tables to get a connection. some bars will be using a new EPOS system - its a trial to see if it works at Glastonbury.
  44. 15 points
  45. 15 points
    Or we could, you know, not chant about Jeremy Corbyn at all?
  46. 14 points
    So that burst was 2mm, mostly in my house, in a short space of time. well sticky stick = no water in the bottom. 4 inches of wet below the surface big dog got dragged out before he added to my wet carpets
  47. 14 points
    Not at all grim in Pilton. T shirt weather. Nothing more than a sprinkle that didn’t even wet the path. the well is well dry. Still no water. We are a desert. The sticky stick shows some moisture about 3 inches into the bottom but nothing more than it has been for two weeks now. still having to water in the veggie garden. Was on my hands and knees weeding the potatoes ( it seemed easier at the time) and my trousers didn’t get damp. The soil just brushed off. Even the water butts are half empty. please smile and celebrate folks for presently we are high and dry.
  48. 14 points
    There was a report on here quite recently from a user who had been sexually assaulted by a stranger who entered her tent at night. Speaking as a man I think we're ignorant to how ingrained this shit is, but stuff like unwanted touching and groping in public spaces seems to be an inevitable fact of life for most women in this country. It's naive to say there aren't shitty men at Glastonbury because there absolutely are, and they're not fringe weirdos. There will be literally hundreds, if not thousands, of men at Glastonbury who'll partake in some everyday harassment and worse. We probably need a female perspective in here or somebody itk about this to give us advice on what we should do about looking out for women at Glastonbury and making it a safe space, but I'd guess that getting to know your tent neighbours and calling out any shit you see is a good start.
  49. 13 points
    Blissful, isn’t it! Still half dozy / half pissed from the night before, ideally feeling only tired with one of those ‘kind hangovers’. Watching the hardcore late night caners trooping home happy and juuuuuust slightly louder than we want them to be, but heyyyy, it’s Glastonbury. They’re not doing any harm. The ground a bit dewey, maybe a little mist and / or the steam of sleeping bodies and swiftly warming tents hovering in the air. The distant clang of a local long drop door, the hungry shitty guzzling hum of a gully sucker emptying out their tanks, a tractor over there somewhere. Bloody hell. Not long now!
  50. 13 points
    I had notifications on for this thread so my inbox had about 100 emails telling me about new posts in here When I skimmed through I saw one titled "Congratulations from eFestivals". Hands started shaking, couldn't click it quick enough! I had a colleague out in the car with me today who started laughing. I genuinely had to open the car window, take my sunglasses off and sit there to compose myself before replying. Pretty sure they thought I was mental I'm taking my fiance who has never been to Glastonbury before - what a way for her to start!


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