Sunday

Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain – Main Stage
Last year we had to suffer the ignominy of missing the UOGB because we were packing the car, this year we’d packed up early before the searing heat and we were in the arena getting a wonderful veggie breakfast at ‘Not the Hot Dog Stall’ for the end of their weird and wonderful renditions of ‘Psycho Killer’ and ‘Silver Machine’, supposedly as soundchecks but I’m convinced they’d just decided to start early. Their mixed up style is instantly likeable and with ‘Life on Mars’ and ‘Substitute’ the large crowd were won over. All this before their hilarious rendition of ‘Miss Dynamit-tee-hee’ re-interpreted in their inimitable style, the music to ‘Fistful of Dollars’ and a crazy re-working of ‘Heard It Through The Grapevine’. But this was nothing compared to the gloriously precise weaving of ‘Pachabel’s Canon’ and ‘God Gave Rock ‘n’ Roll To You’ accomplished with all the skill of a motorcycle display team but on ukuleles obviously. There followed the more traditional ukulele fare of ‘Leaning on a Lampost’ just one problem it’s got a bolero beat! Not content with the subterfuge of corrupting ukulele standards they then dismantle grunge with their own version of ‘Teen Spirit’ before cheekily running away with ‘Le Freak’. Genius! Superbly done and with a deep underlying knowledge of both comedy and musical structure. The biggest crowd I’ve ever seen in front of a stage before noon on a Sunday.

The Zombies – Main Stage
At first looks my thoughts were “Oh no here we go some band I’ve never heard of doing a bunch of old prog rock tunes, anyone under 40 will never have heard of”. This was at first backed up after a song about Love and ‘What Becomes of The Broken Hearted’. But then ‘Hold Your Head Up’ started and I had to reach for the programme revealing that The Zombies included Rob Argent. I’d had no idea and it was a delightful turn of events as we were treated next to The Zombies own ‘She’s Not There’ and there I was thinking it was Santana’s! ‘Time of the Season’ and ‘God Gave Rock And Roll To You’ (for the second time in under two hours) made me realise I knew a fair amount of The Zombies’ tunes and they play the songs note perfectly. A surprise hit.

Chas and Dave – Main Stage
I was up for watching the London duo, but unfortunately my daughter wasn’t! I tried to get her singing along but she was having none of it. Admittedly this was the hottest time of day and it was very, very hot. It didn’t help that I hadn’t brushed up on my Cockney tunes and only knew ‘Gertcha’ and ‘Rabbit’ well enough to sing along. But the crowd were loving it and after a few sound hitches at the beginning they went down a storm. In fact I’m actually rather impressed at just how good a musicians they are, they’re kind of treated as a joke duo but they’re actually much better than that.

A Little Bit of Everything – Surrey Advertiser Stage
The heat and lack of seeing much else but the two main stages means that I decide to have a look at a few other stages. The Comedy Tent is too full to hear anyone on stage from the edge of the crowd. The Rock Cave (wonderfully decorated with little twinkling stars in the black ceiling) is cool but there’s nothing on so I press on to the Surrey Advertiser Stage. When I get there A Little Bit of Everything are playing under sauna like conditions. The low roofed tent means it’s very hot in the tent, but the music from the five piece is really good. Coincidentally as I head towards the front they burst into The Levellers’ ‘15 Years’ and it’s great! They then follow it up with a few of their tunes and they’re also great. They may look a bit unbalanced age wise, but the layers of guitar, great backbone rhythm section, vocals and fiddle create a great folk sound that’s irresistible to jig to. It’s too hot to jig inside though, so I head outside to dance about in the cooler midday sun! Wish I’d caught more bands in this tent this year, will try harder next year.

Marillion – Main Stage
I’m not a huge fan but I have a few albums - Reel To Reel and Misplaced Childhood - and thought I knew a few of their tunes and would get into the whole Marrillion thing. But I recognised none of it and really struggled to remain engaged and the crowd seemed a bit bemused too. They sure didn’t sound like Fish era Marillion and I left disappointed. After so many sparkling greatest hits performances at Guilfest both this weekend and in the past I was expecting similar but it was not to be. I wonder if Fish owns all the tunes I remember.

Martha Tilston – Uncut Stage
Dashing up with my daughter to watch Martha Tilston was an inspired idea. This was a special performance it seemed to us. Strong songs of great depths we slowly moved nearer and nearer until before we knew it the music had captured us and brought us close to the front of the stage. We sat down still able to see her sing and both sat for a few tracks spellbound and appreciative of the beautiful acoustic music. Until the spell was broken when our view was blocked by more of the audience drawn to get close. We headed out of the crowd to listen from a distance and noticed the woman beside us had copies of Martha’s new album ‘Bimbling’ on her rug. So we bought one and listened to it all the way home from Guilfest later that night. Gorgeous music for blissed out late nights.

Lulu – Main Stage
First thing I noticed about Lulu as she bounced onto the stage in black shades, jeans and a big skull belt is how bloomin’ gorgeous she still looks. She may be one of our most famous ladies in pop but she seemed very down to earth as she gives us a terrific version of ‘Teardrops’ and it doesn’t matter how old you are we all love Lulu. After ‘Put a Little Love’ and ‘Where the Poor Boys Dance’ Lulu mentions that she went off to the States, to where it didn’t rain for two months. The one night it did rain and she felt all nostalgic for home. We’re not missing the rain in the slightest however as she slips into ‘Man Who Sold the World’, ‘Independence’, ‘I don’t Wanna Fight’ and a host of other Lulu hits spanning decades. She does the Ronan Keating song ‘We’ve Got Tonight’ and of course eventually ‘Shout’ and it’s been thoroughly fabulous!

Space Ritual – Uncut Stage
Dressed a little more normally this year Nick Turner and the various ex-members of Hawkwind, play a storming gig in the heat that totally blows me away. I just spend the whole set dancing like a loon, well I think I might have been trying to out dance the little girl dressed as a fairy on stage while singing along so raucously that I think I actually put Nick off ‘Master of The Universe’ at one point. Either that or I was convinced I was a dancer at the end of time. I prefer today’s incarnation of Space Ritual more laid back and less visual and really concentrating on the music - well of course there were the dancers too. Some fantastic early era Calvert-Hawkwind tunes like ‘Brainstorming’, ‘Ghost Dance’ and ‘Born To Go’ that probably are the best tunes that Hawkwind produced. Classic stuff!

Daniel Bedingfield – Main Stage
The noise at the front of the stage! The screaming girls! Is there an Adonis on stage? No it’s plain old Daniel in a red T-shirt and yet they’re going crazy! I really can’t see why he just doesn’t look like a sex symbol. But I’m surprised also by how good a range he has on his voice and just how good he is singing live. It’s not my cup of tea but clearly a large portion of the audience think he’s terrific! I take the opportunity to sign up for the air guitar world record while listening to Daniel and watching a Womble chase kids about!

Status Quo – Main Stage
Before the mighty Quo, there’s a little matter of the air guitar record, though as a bass player I’ve checked and air bass still counts, but I can’t stop people walking over my cabs! Led by three Slash-alikes and a Dalek called Derek we thrash out Sweet Child Of Mine and enter the record books, yay! All ages have got involved - fantastic. There’s a short wait while the roadies organise the speakers on stage though they look more like kitchen hobs and cookers on their sides from where we are. Then the mighty Quo stride out and, and, and ... nothing, they sound dreadful though the crowd happily sing along with the numbers they know. But then come the numbers they don’t know and I leave wincing. I returned later to find the crowd in full flow to ‘Rockin’ All Over The World’ and I hear they dragged Rolf on stage later too, who said he’d be back next year. But as a Quo fan I thought it best to remember them as I last saw them in 1985.

Hayseed Dixie – Uncut Stage
And so I headed off to Hayseed Dixie, to discover these guys in dungarees were fantastic, much like the Ukuleles and United Stoats they were trashing cover versions with gusto and humour. They started late - to give me a chance to get there obviously - and started with a hilarious version of ‘Hell’s Bells’ with a triangle. Loads of rock and AC/DC tunes followed - a perfect end to the festival. Metal and country! Priceless!

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