Dilemma...

[morph100]

Go for the full thing plenty of meet ups and things to do on the Wednesday and Thursday. Efestivals meet, glastochat fb meet, other pre arranged meets. You could join one of the solo camping groups and go from there. 

Hope you work out the best way forward but whatever you decide try and get some good things to look forward to, Glastonbury or a holiday or just days out. Hard times but time heals and things will get better.

[russycarps]

Gosh, what a horrendous harpy she sounds. How dare she tell you that you can't go.

You must go. It's absolutely none of her business.

[Sasperella]

Definitely go! Camp solo sounds awesome and I'm sure you'll the efestivals meet will be full of us friendly types. I also spent most of Glastonbury last year with my boyfriend, but this year he is going with the chick he replaced me with in November. Devastation ensued but meh...Glastonbury is big enough to know I won't have to run into him! I can't think of anywhere better to get over someone

Edited March 25, 2017 by Sasperella

[toppo]

My first Glastonbury 2009 I was going with my then girlfriend and 2 others. Hired campervan and was all set to go. Turned out she was a cheating @#$/$. So cancelled camper and came very close to cancelling ticket. But I bit the bullet and never looked back. Went alone and despite my fears it was a life changing experience. Went solo twice. Then in 2013 my GF sister and niece went. This year will be my 7th and my (now) Fiancées 5th. We got engaged at stone circle in Aug 15 having just bought a wooden mushroom off Sawdust Surfer. And this year we will be having a hand fasting there. I will also be fulfilling an ambition since my first Glastonbury and I will be working for Festival Medical Services as an event responder.

Yes I felt at time what's the point in going we'd planned it together but looking back going alone was arguably one of my best decisions. So don't listen to her. She has no right telling you you cannot go. 

[Sack truck]

Without being harsh, she probably doesn't want you to go as potentially seeing you there will stop her enjoyment of it which is incredibly selfish of her and certainly not the glasto spirit

 

Go, have a ball and use the whole time to let your hair down and forget all your woes. It's the best place for it

[henry bear]

1 hour ago, henry bear said:

Sorry to hear the news. I don't see why she gets to go and you don't! I agree with the others - pay for your ticket and decide later when you're better placed to make such decisions. I had terrible news a week after securing Glasto tickets, news which seriously jeopardised my chances of going, but the thought of Glasto itself was something I held onto and now it seems certain we're going. Don't let this dream go. 

Out of interest, why the downvote? 

[midlifecrisis]

Lol! Sorry. Think that might have been me. Fat fingers scrolling small phone! Thought I'd hit a down vote but couldn't find it. I've up voted you to balance out just incase it was me!

[Avalon_Fields]

Most definitely go, absolutely agree with everyone else, might just be the spur for a fresh start and all that. Yeah come to the efest meet, happy to buy you a beer too. It's great you can feel comfortable to share this with us all here and I'm sure every one is 100% wishing you the best.

Edited March 26, 2017 by Avalon_Fields

[char90]

Go, meet some great people have some laughs and escape from reality for a few days. There's nothing like a Glastonbury 'moment' to re-energise you for whatever crap may come the following months. I also don't get why she gets to go but you should stay home. Get yourself down :-)

[Curlygirl]

@The Red Telephone you should definitely go. Do a few meets Wed and Thurs, camp with solo, you'll have a great time. Think on the other hand if you don't go... sat at home, watching it on tv, feeling lonely, resentful, bitter?? She has no right to tell you not to go!! I'll send you my number if you want and you can camp with my crew/meet up and party? You're never alone at Glastonbury! 

[adamg1602]

Cheeky cow!! I can't believe she has the audacity to say she thinks you shouldn't go. I think you should go.. Most definitely. There's options for people going solo and from reading on here it seems that camp solo has a great bunch

Edited March 26, 2017 by adamg1602

[kalifire]

2 hours ago, The Red Telephone said:

I am utterly heartbroken and am struggling to see a decent future for myself at the moment.

Give this bit time. It'll probably take months. Your future will make itself apparent and you'll be able to look back on this instead of being 'in it'.

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My priority now has to be my little boy and enjoying the time I get to spend with him.

And I reckon that ought to be your focus. Let him give you the strength to get by as you remain strong for him.

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So, what to do about Glastonbury? We were both going together with another couple this year. It was our first time together last year and it was one of the happiest times we'd had together. I had been previously three times in the 90s, she had never been prior to 2016 ... She said that she is still going and doesn't think i should go.

She probably feels like she'd like to enjoy it without the chance of seeing you, which is understandable. But, it's her problem. That's not something you have to worry about. If you want to go, then go. It's up to her to decide what to do about it, not up to you to manager her problems for her. If you don't feel like you can go if she's there, then you're both on the same page so one of you will need to compromise (were you planning on bringing your boy? I'd be inclined to be where he is). If you can handle her being there somewhere while you're there as well, then come to Glastonbury.

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Maybe I could just go Friday-Sunday when the need for company isn't so great?

Bollocks to that. Get there on the Wednesday and soak it all up. Come to the eFests meet, bimble about and indulge in the stuff that's there on Wednesday and Thursday - there'll loads of things on. I think you need to redefine what being alone means (instead of it being 'away from her' which is how it'll probably feel right now). If there's one place to embrace that and ground yourself, it's Glastonbury. Go easy on the booze this year.

[Keithy]

1. Pay for your ticket. You can get a refund after balance payment date.

2. Camp with a solo group. @Scull99 will help you. You'll have a group of people who'll embrace you.

3. Go to efests meet. It's very friendly. And if Rupert Murdoch dies, @eastynh is buying jelly and ice cream. 

4. Also claim your @kalifire pint.

5. Glastonbury is an amazing escape from life. It can also be really tough if you're emotionally not in a good place ... but.... there's nowhere that has such good support mechanisms, whether it be the welfare tent, efesters, or the general crowd. People will help you. 

6. Make sure you control your destiny. You can't control what others do but you can control what you do. If it's over, it's over. Don't let events dictate.

7. Nobody has ever lay on their deathbed wishing they had gone to less Glastonbury Festivals. 

8. Do you really want to miss out sitting up at the top of Park, late at night, looking over fields of tents, stages and lights and thinking how wonderful life can be?

9. Pablo Honey.

 

[siweltrebor]

If you want to go to Glastonbury, you should go to Glastonbury, it sounds like you really need it and will do you some good to be back on the farm, it's given me great perspective, strength and positivity that sticks with me long past the end of the festival each year I go even the difficult moments have their silver linings.

[Wilfko]

I'll happily meet you for a drink anytime bud. I went Glastonbury in 2015 a month after going through some very heavy shit, I went with all my friends but very uncharacteristicly spent every night wandering the place alone and teary eyed, sounds tragic but walking that placed and having time to contemplate things really helped me. No matter how crap things are you have to be made of stone to walk around and not feel positive about the world.

I'll try play devils advocate, there's obviously the possibility that her being there can affect your enjoyment, you might be scanning crowds or have her on your mind.. but you need to remember, you can always go home if you're having a bad time.. it's not a trap.

Edited March 26, 2017 by Wilfko

[BlackZeppelin]

Mate, you're fucking going! Don't underestimate the healing power of Drugs and Rock'n Roll

Exactly the place you should be - who knows who you'll meet.....certainly someone who won't advise you against doing something that gives you the greatest joy - fuck that!

And you're more than welcome to meet up with me and my two Aussie mates (not as bad as it sounds on the surface)

Mind you, you'll have to bring your own mushrooms 

 

 

[eastynh]

Mate have you thought about working the festival? It might be the perfect solution to your dilema. It would keep your mind occupied, perfect for meeting new people, you would be doing something positive and still get to enjoy the festival.

I don't know if it is too late in the day to apply, but it is definitely worth considering.

[The Red Telephone]

6 hours ago, kalifire said:

Give this bit time. It'll probably take months. Your future will make itself apparent and you'll be able to look back on this instead of being 'in it'.

And I reckon that ought to be your focus. Let him give you the strength to get by as you remain strong for him.

She probably feels like she'd like to enjoy it without the chance of seeing you, which is understandable. But, it's her problem. That's not something you have to worry about. If you want to go, then go. It's up to her to decide what to do about it, not up to you to manager her problems for her. If you don't feel like you can go if she's there, then you're both on the same page so one of you will need to compromise (were you planning on bringing your boy? I'd be inclined to be where he is). If you can handle her being there somewhere while you're there as well, then come to Glastonbury.

Bollocks to that. Get there on the Wednesday and soak it all up. Come to the eFests meet, bimble about and indulge in the stuff that's there on Wednesday and Thursday - there'll loads of things on. I think you need to redefine what being alone means (instead of it being 'away from her' which is how it'll probably feel right now). If there's one place to embrace that and ground yourself, it's Glastonbury. Go easy on the booze this year.

No, he's only 4 and weren't planning on bringing him until the 2020 festival. We'd arranged for her mum to come and stop at ours like last year and look after him. Hopefully things will be ok on the access front, don't envisage too many problems....at the moment!

[The Red Telephone]

1 hour ago, eastynh said:

Mate have you thought about working the festival? It might be the perfect solution to your dilema. It would keep your mind occupied, perfect for meeting new people, you would be doing something positive and still get to enjoy the festival.

I don't know if it is too late in the day to apply, but it is definitely worth considering.

It's an option, although it may be too late? Something to consider for future festivals though....think I'm going to treat this year as "rite of passage/ clear my head/ I can do this" thing!

[The Red Telephone]

Haven't slept much (what sleep I had was punctuated by a Glastonbury dream of Radiohead opening their set with "Bloom") but feel much more positive this morning.

Been for a run and thought about June. I'm going to pay for my ticket with every intention of going. Gonna start looking at tents later on. If she wants to go, fine. If I see her their I deal with it.

Thank you all so much for the support. I'm not usually an over-dramatic/ over-sharer but felt so low last night and this place has picked me up no end. I am going to the efests meet and claim my 523 free drinks and look at camping with the solo brigade.

Bring on Tuesday and the announcement! (hopefully)

[The Red Telephone]

6 hours ago, Keithy said:

1. Pay for your ticket. You can get a refund after balance payment date.

2. Camp with a solo group. @Scull99 will help you. You'll have a group of people who'll embrace you.

3. Go to efests meet. It's very friendly. And if Rupert Murdoch dies, @eastynh is buying jelly and ice cream. 

4. Also claim your @kalifire pint.

5. Glastonbury is an amazing escape from life. It can also be really tough if you're emotionally not in a good place ... but.... there's nowhere that has such good support mechanisms, whether it be the welfare tent, efesters, or the general crowd. People will help you. 

6. Make sure you control your destiny. You can't control what others do but you can control what you do. If it's over, it's over. Don't let events dictate.

7. Nobody has ever lay on their deathbed wishing they had gone to less Glastonbury Festivals. 

8. Do you really want to miss out sitting up at the top of Park, late at night, looking over fields of tents, stages and lights and thinking how wonderful life can be?

9. Pablo Honey.

 

All of this

[oneeye]

Truly sorry to hear about your current situation; emotionally draining for all.

You should go though; Glastonbury is great therapy.

Just be careful that it all doesn't get too much, remember there is 24hr help dotted around the site, don't be afraid to use it if you need to off load.

Go, have a great time, laugh, cry and kick start your future.

Good luck and best wishes x

[GlastoEls]

Unanimous : eFesters say GO!

[Nobody Interesting]

I feel for you with the breakup. Time will heal.

As for Glastonbury - go. Pay your balance and go.

Maybe camp with Camp Solo folks (thread on here somewhere) but go. Go to the Efests meet and meet the folks on this forum.

It is down to you and you alone if you go not anyone else and certainly not someone you are splitting from.

If you do not go you will regret it - if you do go and find after a day or two you are not happy then you can leave.
 

Live your life and don't let others dictate to you what you should or should not do.

[giantkatestacks]

52 minutes ago, The Red Telephone said:

No, he's only 4 and weren't planning on bringing him until the 2020 festival. We'd arranged for her mum to come and stop at ours like last year and look after him. Hopefully things will be ok on the access front, don't envisage too many problems....at the moment!

I was going to ask that too. If she is going to be away for 5 days then it might be a good opportunity for you to take him away on holiday somewhere. He is going to be finding it much more confusing and hurtful than either of you tbh and how you act with him will affect the rest of his life. 

Sorry to be overdramatic but I have been through it with my children.