Personal Worst / most embarrassing event

[karaseen]

1 hour ago, **claire** said:

Oh bless your heart - there's defo some thought that needs to be given to festival attire isn't there, we've all learned from our past mistakes! 

I learnt that lesson the hard way!  Whenever I see girls in playsuits at Glasto I think back to my horror!  Why would you want to have to undress to use the loo!? UGH.

[karaseen]

1 hour ago, incident said:

So wait, your Glastonbury one is more graphic than that? It must be goodd

[cazzatron]

1 minute ago, karaseen said:

Nah you need to share now...

[joeltg]

Not a personal one, but I enjoyed it more due to it happening to my manager at the time.

Up in block9 in 2014 and my manager decided to slip away and return 5 minutes later with alot less on, thought it would be a laugh to come back in just a leopard print thong before we went into NYC Downlow.

He has a tendancy to get into certain situations and as I turned away for all of 30 seconds to grab two moustaches, he was jumped by one of the colourful entertainers, When I turned back round, he had been pushed down into the mud, hands and knees, and was being rode ike seabiscuit...balls hanging out either side, this big guy/girl slapping him across the ass.

Quite a big group formed to take some snaps, and I know now why he likes to ban the group taking photos at Glastonbury

I bet not many have seen there manager in such a precarious position! He is a good crack bless him.

 

 

 

[sweetsounding]

15 minutes ago, joeltg said:

 He is a good crack bless him.

Lol pun intended?! The craic is mighty with that one 

[donthaveacoolname]

Mine happened some time back in the mid to late 00's not sure when exactly,  we were all sitting round a campfire having a few ciders and other assorted fun aids, when I decided I had enough, so got up to go to bed but didn't cop on to the fact that my legs had fallen asleep until I tried to put all my weight on then. I ended up falling, nearly knocking myself out on one of the girls knees who was the other side of the fire. I was sprawled out on the floor recovering from the shock of the fall and the bang on the head as everyone else was shouting at me and trying to drag me from where I was, apparently my legs were still in the fire!!!!!!!

[Badlands]

We're all friends here so I think I'm safe telling this one.

2011 late Thursday PM/ Friday AM.

The wife completely steaming drunk and unable to walk after an evening at that whiskey blues bar thats no longer there. 

I'm practically carrying her back to the tent, almost as drunk, but more concerned by how I'm absolutely desperate for a pee - total 'kicking your legs about, unable to stand still as you think you'll piss yourself if you stop' desperate.

I miss two or three toilets on the way home as she cannot walk without assistance, things are reaching a critical mass.

I'm practically running to the tent, dragging wife with one arm, her bag in the other, fantasizing reaching the tent where that sweet sweet Comfort bottle will take away this bladder bother.

Eventually we reach the tent, I'm that desperate I'm practically unbuttoning while I'm running, manage to pull the zip down, get the wife onto her bed, and I've made it.... utter bliss.....  grinning like an idiot, relieved I've managed not be 'that lad' that pisses himself at glastonbury.

It's only after about 10 seconds that I realise that I'm actually having a piss in her bag.

Not my finest moment.

Come the morning after, i wake up to the missus shouting and panicking, thinking we've been robbed as someone's been through her bag and just chucked her stuff all over the place. I have to explain to her that they're infact 'drying'.

 

 

[**claire**]

I'm surprised at the volume of sharting that occurs at Glastonbury!

[Woffy]

4 hours ago, cb4747 said:

I feel that. I used a shewee at reading, stood next to my better half and was really chuffed that we were sharing a man wee together and then made a mess. 

That sort of behaviour really should be saved for the bedroom / shower.

[blackdog]

Running to catch the end of Muse in 2010 & knocking someones dinner out of their hand, sorry i didnt stop, my mate saw it all from behind!

[johnomatic]

Quite simply throwing up right  in the middle of The Park at about 2am one night, to a wide variety of responses from people nearby.

Definitely not my proudest moment. 

[Spindles]

1 hour ago, Badlands said:

It's only after about 10 seconds that I realise that I'm actually having a piss in her bag.

Not my finest moment.

Comedy gold.  Thank you

[pie_and_a_pint]

Dropping almost all of the egg out of my bacon and egg sandwich down the front of my last clean pair of leggings. The stain it left looked somewhat, er, dodgy, so I decided to give them a quick wash under the tap (yes, I was still wearing them) but then I just looked like I'd pissed myself until they dried...

[Woffy]

4 hours ago, incident said:

So wait, your Glastonbury one is more graphic than that? It must be good.

 

Fairly boring for me - after the headliners I hiked up to the top of Big Ground to use the flushing toilets. Did what needed doing. Pleased with a job well done, went to the bag to get some paper.. None there. Not even anything that could be improvised.. Spent the next 30 minutes very, very carefully shuffling back to the campsite in what felt like the most uncomfortable way followed by a deeply unpleasant session with wet wipes etc. Didn't feel clean until I took a shower the next day.

Not even a sock or underwear, incident?

[Harmonic Prospector]

About 4am on the Sunday morning in 2013 me and my friend were winding down up near Croissant Neuf after the Motown Party at WG (would love for that to come back!). We were chatting to some randoms, all of us talking about the fact that we all were starting our shifts in only 4 hours time and how we should all be heading off to bed. I wasn't feeling particularly squiffy but as we stood up I felt the world start spinning and had to sit down on a bench. I quickly became very messy indeed and proceeded to grip hold of one of the recycling bins (presumably because I felt it was anchoring me) before actually sticking me head inside as it made me feel safe. My next recollection was coming to next to my friend and him saying to me "How are you feeling now? Are you aware of what just happened?" I replied that I had just been feeling a little tired and emotional. He said "You've been more than that mate!" I apparently removed my head from the bin stumbled a few steps before completely crashing out taking out 4 recycling bins in the process. Completely passed out and unresponsive. A group of about 10 people came over and helped my mate lift me off the floor and get me into a safe position before moving on at which point I came back around. 

Not totally embarrassing as I have no recollection of that 10 minute period but what it did demonstrate was how quick people are to help others out at Glasto when things have taken their toll. You can always guarantee that when someone is a little worse for wear passed out somewhere with no friends around them, there will always be a stream of passing people coming to check them over to see if they are OK or need help. I don't really see it at any other festival and to me it really is what makes that Glasto spirit so unique and special. 

[Woffy]

2 hours ago, Badlands said:

We're all friends here so I think I'm safe telling this one.

2011 late Thursday PM/ Friday AM.

The wife completely steaming drunk and unable to walk after an evening at that whiskey blues bar thats no longer there. 

I'm practically carrying her back to the tent, almost as drunk, but more concerned by how I'm absolutely desperate for a pee - total 'kicking your legs about, unable to stand still as you think you'll piss yourself if you stop' desperate.

I miss two or three toilets on the way home as she cannot walk without assistance, things are reaching a critical mass.

I'm practically running to the tent, dragging wife with one arm, her bag in the other, fantasizing reaching the tent where that sweet sweet Comfort bottle will take away this bladder bother.

Eventually we reach the tent, I'm that desperate I'm practically unbuttoning while I'm running, manage to pull the zip down, get the wife onto her bed, and I've made it.... utter bliss.....  grinning like an idiot, relieved I've managed not be 'that lad' that pisses himself at glastonbury.

It's only after about 10 seconds that I realise that I'm actually having a piss in her bag.

Not my finest moment.

Come the morning after, i wake up to the missus shouting and panicking, thinking we've been robbed as someone's been through her bag and just chucked her stuff all over the place. I have to explain to her that they're infact 'drying'.

 

 

Fantastic!!!

[Woffy]

4 hours ago, sloseph said:

I think we've found a winner and it's only page 2

We all know your best/worst embarrassing Glasto moment. I love it to this day! Legendary!

;-) ;-) ;-)

[dexydexy]

3 hours ago, Badlands said:

We're all friends here so I think I'm safe telling this one.

2011 late Thursday PM/ Friday AM.

The wife completely steaming drunk and unable to walk after an evening at that whiskey blues bar thats no longer there. 

I'm practically carrying her back to the tent, almost as drunk, but more concerned by how I'm absolutely desperate for a pee - total 'kicking your legs about, unable to stand still as you think you'll piss yourself if you stop' desperate.

I miss two or three toilets on the way home as she cannot walk without assistance, things are reaching a critical mass.

I'm practically running to the tent, dragging wife with one arm, her bag in the other, fantasizing reaching the tent where that sweet sweet Comfort bottle will take away this bladder bother.

Eventually we reach the tent, I'm that desperate I'm practically unbuttoning while I'm running, manage to pull the zip down, get the wife onto her bed, and I've made it.... utter bliss.....  grinning like an idiot, relieved I've managed not be 'that lad' that pisses himself at glastonbury.

It's only after about 10 seconds that I realise that I'm actually having a piss in her bag.

Not my finest moment.

Come the morning after, i wake up to the missus shouting and panicking, thinking we've been robbed as someone's been through her bag and just chucked her stuff all over the place. I have to explain to her that they're infact 'drying'.

 

 

OMG i'm actually crying with laughter!

[dexydexy]

Not Glastonbury but Oxygen / Oxegen around 2006. I got really drunk and separated from my friends, had my phone stolen (which was shit, obvs) so made my way to the tent to call it a night. Got woken up about 2am by the couple that actually owned the tent I'd fallen asleep in! 

[ohvienna]

7 hours ago, verrymerry said:

I got it wrong with a she pee, it wasn't even my first use!

I also did this. Felt so confident when I had a trial run at home sober, not wearing any pants, all of the room in the world.

Drunk in a portaloo at Glasto just resulted in me weeing on my own leg

[Slugworth]

2 hours ago, blackdog said:

Running to catch the end of Muse in 2010 & knocking someones dinner out of their hand, sorry i didnt stop, my mate saw it all from behind!

I was enjoying that chicken curry.

[Mezhyp1]

Whilst attempting to piss into a lucozade bottle, I absolutely soaked my air bed last year, the way I saw I was it was too late and I was too fucked to do anything about it, so put a towel down and got a slightly warm nights sleep

[fur_q]

Was once so monumentally  bejollocksed that I found myself dancing to James Blunt. 

Edited May 17, 2016 by fur_q

[Gnomicide]

7 hours ago, T-Mouse said:

This didnt happen to me thank god but it was without question the funniest thing i have ever seen at Glastonbury.

Its 2013. Alt J are due on the Other Stage any minute. Im tapped on the shoulder by my friend. Hes noticed that my other mates pint cup is leaking from the bottom. He makes sure our whole 15 strong group is aware of what hes about to do.

He grabs everyones attention. "Hey hey. Guys. Watch this", he says with a cheeky expression on his face. Confidence flowing through him. This is his moment. Hes got that twinkle in his eye. "This will be utterly hilarious" he says to himself.

He proceeds to bend down, open his mouth wide and catch the liquid escaping from the bottom of my friends pint cup. The cheeky expression is replaced with one of shock. Eyes wide as saucers, he realises the folly of his actions and recoils in horror. 

Little did my friend know, the liquid escaping from the bottom of the cup is urine. My other mate is not-so-slyly pissing in to his empty cup. We all see this immediately as hes stood behind us doing it. Unfortunately for poor Adam, he was stood behind and simply could not see what we saw, which led him to the assumption that the golden liquid was cool delicious lager, and not the warm stale urine of my friend.

I dont ever condone peeing on the land. We gave him grief for doing it and rightly so. But i spent the entire hour of Alt Js gig in complete hysterics. My friends has literally never been the same. Forever reliving the moment he caught piss in his mouth willingly.

Not at Glastonbury and I'm not embarrassed but In a related story, a mate once pissed on my head in the middle of the night,  apparently mistaking me for a toilet.

Anyway, it's not as unpleasant a taste as you might imagine.

[Gnomicide]

2 hours ago, Harmonic Prospector said:

About 4am on the Sunday morning in 2013 me and my friend were winding down up near Croissant Neuf after the Motown Party at WG (would love for that to come back!). We were chatting to some randoms, all of us talking about the fact that we all were starting our shifts in only 4 hours time and how we should all be heading off to bed. I wasn't feeling particularly squiffy but as we stood up I felt the world start spinning and had to sit down on a bench. I quickly became very messy indeed and proceeded to grip hold of one of the recycling bins (presumably because I felt it was anchoring me) before actually sticking me head inside as it made me feel safe. My next recollection was coming to next to my friend and him saying to me "How are you feeling now? Are you aware of what just happened?" I replied that I had just been feeling a little tired and emotional. He said "You've been more than that mate!" I apparently removed my head from the bin stumbled a few steps before completely crashing out taking out 4 recycling bins in the process. Completely passed out and unresponsive. A group of about 10 people came over and helped my mate lift me off the floor and get me into a safe position before moving on at which point I came back around. 

Not totally embarrassing as I have no recollection of that 10 minute period but what it did demonstrate was how quick people are to help others out at Glasto when things have taken their toll. You can always guarantee that when someone is a little worse for wear passed out somewhere with no friends around them, there will always be a stream of passing people coming to check them over to see if they are OK or need help. I don't really see it at any other festival and to me it really is what makes that Glasto spirit so unique and special. 

Did they take the hammers out your pockets?