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Festival Problems


Alban
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Dear Jim.

Please could you fix it for me to be the lead singer of a band that is able to catch and drink a cup of thrown beer at me whilst crowd walking at a festival?  I've always wanted to do this.  It kind of falls into the hygiene, camping, cooking etc categories so I hope you'll see favour in me.

If you need any help designing how it should be videoed, this link might help.

Link

Thanks in advance,

Ian xx

PS, I am happy to look into your saggy bollocks issue but not until I've got a free Wednesday morning.

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Hi Alban,

Sorry to see you've been bombarded with all these non-problems... hopefully you can fix mine for me though.

My issue is that when I'm quite near the front of a festival crowd the noise level from the music makes it difficult for me to have a conversation with my friends. At the moment we have a bit of a workaround involving repeatedly shouting at each other, but it takes ages to cover a topic as simple as that video of a cat I saw on facebook earlier today.

I don't know if it's appropriate to solutionize here, but perhaps some sort of signalling system so the band could see I was talking and keep it down a bit until I'd finished?

Thanks!

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Hello Alban. I've had a saggy ballsack for 2 years now. It's debilitating, but I've never let it get me down. Sometimes it gets so sweaty at the festival, I have to pull it up and tuck it over my entire penis. I look like an Action Man. But the thing is, the thing I never forget is, it that there's always hope. Hope that a product design student could design something that might help my affliction.

*Stirring coldplay music*

I'm crying with joy now. Not sadness. When I think of the power of hope. Of the power of dreams. And the way one man, one tiny, insignificant man with a saggy ballsack could - with the hope of prayer and the help of a product design student, with the hope of a glimmer of a chance...could change this old world we live in for the better.

Please pm me your phone number and let's get started.

 

 

My biggest problem is i'm now going to be scared an Orangutang with it's bollocks pulled over its penis is going to be standing near me in the crowd.  

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How about creating an all in one festivals university pack.  In it you need a surveymonkey questionnaire about one of 3 things: Branding, Sustainability or Transport.  Basically you could punt these out at a price to the kind of people who believe that 'events management' is a worthwhile degree before the cold hard truth of the world of work and paying off the debt of the last few wasted years.

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On 8 November 2015 at 16:56:13, ian the worm said:

Dear Jim.

Please could you fix it for me to be the lead singer of a band that is able to catch and drink a cup of thrown beer at me whilst crowd walking at a festival?  I've always wanted to do this.  It kind of falls into the hygiene, camping, cooking etc categories so I hope you'll see favour in me.

If you need any help designing how it should be videoed, this link might help.

Link

Thanks in advance,

Ian xx

PS, I am happy to look into your saggy bollocks issue but not until I've got a free Wednesday morning.

That is the greatest video I've ever seen...

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