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Funny things overheard at the festival


MichaelsBeard
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I love this one.

 

Heard this whilst on my way to the taps one morning.

Hungover guy #1 - 'Oh no'

 

Hungover guy #2 - 'Whats up?

 

Hungover guy #1 - 'I think I facetimed my ex last night at Shangri La'

 

Hungover guy #2 - 'Oh no. What happened?'

 

Hungover guy #1 - 'She just kept repeating 'Go to bed Ian' over and over.



 

 

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At the brothers bar a man asked one of the staff

"Are these all ciders?"

Girl nods

"Do you do anything else"

Girl shakes head

And at the Brothers Bar again 4 girls in front of me ordered their drinks, were asked if they were all over 18 to which they replied yes, and we're duly served; brilliant ID checking!

Oh, and not quite overheard but near Williams Green 2 girls asked us for directions to the Beat Hotel so we pointed in the direction & said go around the Pyramid & it's on the right, she looks at it & asks "is that the Pyramid?" my response, admittedly quite sarcastic was 'yes the thing that's shaped like a Pyramid... ' Ejits

Edited by verrymerry
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Heard from the long drop cubicle next to me.

Guy shouts to his mate waiting outside for him. "Mate, I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna go for a shit"

Mate replies "What, really?"

.......after a bit of a pause first guy says "Actually, you might need to come in here and massage my stomach while I push"

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2 lads walking past the longdrops to the right of the pyramid, lad was telling his mate about a "fit" girl he had met and was going to meet her later and was asking his mate to go with him...his mate says "has she got any fit mates for me" first lad pauses then says "yeah yeah course mate" second says "ok then yeah mate I'll help you out"

She definately didnt did she haha

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In the queue for London Underground on Thursday, and a guy had obviously got his timing slightly off for how long it would take to get through the queue as he was gurning like a champion.  Just heard him mutter "If they don't get me in here soon they'll have to peel me off that fucking wall".

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Heard from the long drop cubicle next to me.

Guy shouts to his mate waiting outside for him. "Mate, I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna go for a shit"

Mate replies "What, really?"

.......after a bit of a pause first guy says "Actually, you might need to come in here and massage my stomach while I push"

 

and we have a winner!

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Overheard a group of 20 year old glasto virgins having a conversation along the lines of

 

Person 1; It is just like Reading but about 100 times better;

 

Person 2: Yeah and in a much nicer setting.

 

Person 3:  The line-up at Reading is quite good this year.

 

Person 2:  But that is about the only thing that is good about the place.

 

Person 3:  Unless you like having your tent shat on by your neighbour in the middle of the night.

 

Made me chuckle and glad that they were appreciating the good things of Glasto

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We had a young welsh couple next to us who were having some trouble with their in-tent lavatorial arrangements overnight on one of the first nights (lad was just too mashed to walk to the toilet I think, it wasn't even raining!)  after his girlfriend screamed when he'd clearly missed whatever he was aiming for it goes quiet and he reflected...

 

"You know... sometimes surviving Glastonbury is about sleeping in piss."

 

She wasn't convinced.

 

We're not sure, but we think he tried for a #2 a bit later too because she went absoluely apeshit telling him to put his arse away.

Edited by Magma
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Also

Walking back from shangrila at 5am Friday morning, overheard a girl still gurning badly to her friend

"Gonna go back to the tent, pop a Valium, re-evaluate my life and have a shit"

:lol:

Edited by Matt42
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As I was queuing to get in on Wednesday morning, a small child behind me said to his dad

 

"Why don't I have to have a ticket?" His dads reply was "Grown ups need a ticket to get in but children don't, we don't pay for you to get in until after your twelve and then you wont come again" "oh" said the child then just went very quite.

 

Made me chuckle after the long queue/walk from the car park 

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Nope, Big Ground.  But I have a feeling that the sentiment was being echoed by 18 year olds across the site.

 

Almost word for word....

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Some young stereotypical rocker ladsladslads after telling me Shubunkin and the Mineshafters were the best band ever and their set was amazing:

 

Me: You guys must be proper buzzing about Libertines on the Pyramid then

 

Them: Who? Libertines? Na mate don't know any of their stuff.

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