balti-pie

In 2008 i went down on the wednesday with some mates, parked up in purple miles away from gate C as per normal, pitched up the tent etc and got everything sorted - then my girlfriend at the time drove down on the thursday, and she wasnt great at directions so she got lost on the a303 somehow and she ended up in the hospitality parking about a hundred yards outside of gate A, in that very spot you've marked 😄 dunno how, she had a normal parking pass, but i presume the dudes on the gate thought she looked like she might kill someone if she wasnt parked as close as possible . . . it made the monday morning an absolute breeze tbf

Just googled Obscene Extreme, it looks ace! Definitely a fair few bands i'd watch, that'll be a belter 👍

Before it was Truth, it was Hell, so i presume its just a gentle rebrand as per the whole evolving Shangri-la thing. Wouldnt mind it being a bit differently set out, so there isnt a throughfare at the back as much (and a bit more heavy stuff on there would be lovely too, bring back Napalm Death etc!)

Hiking in scotland would be a great way to ignore it all yknow. I've hiked the West highland way and the Speyside way in the last few years, and its been great - book up the accommodation well in advance, plot your route so you're not undertaking ridiculous distances, and its a brilliant way to spend a week. Start each day with a fryup, bit of hiking through some amazing countryside, about six hours a day/15 miles ish so room for afternoon nappage and a couple of pints with dinner somewhere, and then b&b/little hotel/pub rooms for a wonderful night's sleep and ready to do it all again the next day. Perhaps a little whisky here and there to aid your feet too! If i were avoiding a glastonbury, thats precisely what i would do

They have a coconut and lychee one, that sounds amazing - the pineapple and grapefruit sounds good too. I do like a rum, but i like a bash of it before dropping £25 on a bottle. Got to see if i can spy it in a pub at some point so i can try it 👍

I think, for the purposes of research, that youll have to have a little snifter and review on this very thread. Ahead of the festival, obvs.

The fairly standard wooden mushroom, which was dipped in mud and driven home to go on the mantelpiece - where its remained since 2005, and itll be his 19th anniversary this summer! Mud is still present on his nose. Every year i look at the candle powered little boats and say i'm going to buy one, despite not really having a vessel that would show it off to its best - and it wasnt even there last year so the (ahem) ship may have already sailed, so to speak

No, they're funny. In the same way that Spinal Tap is/are funny. big bottom is an absolute banger tbf, Sleaford Mods wont ever be able to get within a hundred miles of such a tune. Didnt Spinal Tap play early on the pyramid one year? That needs to happen again!

If an acoustic set by Ocean Colour Scene - in the year of twenty twenty four ffs - isnt the worst possible potential activity of the glastonbury weekend then i'm a dutchman. And that includes all volunteering and working shifts.

Plus the pattern of: Acoustic Avalon hang on, they're going alphabetic on stage announcements! Shangri-la no they're not, there is no pattern 😁

The Earache artists are: Bob Vylan Cam Cole Delilah Bon High Fade Kneecap the last four i've not heard of to be honest, but i'll check em out in the hope i find my new favourite thing 👍

This is a loyalist wind-up 😄

I'd not anticipate any Slayer at all at a Kerry King gig tbf - he's an awkward sod at the best of times 😄 his stuff doesnt sound bad at all, quite enjoyed the couple of songs i've heard, but not anywhere near enough to drop £50 on a ticket unless the venue was a hundred yards down the road from me

TMI obviously, but a good poop is part of my morning ablutions and i don't feel right with the world til ive had one. In a long drop or a compost loo, not a portaloo, and typically between 8 and 9am. My first glastonbury was 2005 and i was a bit more squeamish about things then, i didnt poop from the thursday when i got there until the sunday morning, and then i had the mother of all movements just off the railway track in a long drop 😁 it was soundtracked by the Levellers, who were playing nearby at the time. I always think of them as im pooping open air. It was followed by a second huge bowel movement about an hour later, and since then i've shat like a prince at glasto. right, i feel i've overshared now 🤠

I'm rocking up first knockings on monday, staying in the Travelodge by Podimore on the sunday night so i can head straight in and get my campsite sorted in the oxfield from 10am. Get wristbanded and get my shifts and everything from about 1pm, then ill head into site for a stroll around to see some sights, sit under a tree, work out when im working and who i can see 👍 Other working mates in other areas will be there, some late monday and others on tuesday - but im more than happy to stroll about with a few cans and find some quiet spots for a sitdown. I've always managed to somehow not be working first thing on the wednesday, so i tend to get up early and get up to the sign for about 8/8.30am, and watch people streaming in, the fields slowly filling up with tents and excitement. And arguments 😄 i love watching people carrying all their sh*t, knowing their moment of absolute bliss is under an hour away, but they have to go through the sweaty heavy trauma first to earn it